guilty-obsession
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since: 04-16-06, id: 521077, Profile Updated: 01-09-10
country: USA
Author has written 13 stories for Romance, Humor, Essay, Love, Life, Humor, Young Adult, and Thriller.

Hey, everyone! I'm Lorah! I'm an 20-year-old, fun-loving girl from the Midwest. I'm only 5'1" (yes, I KNOW I'm short...) and my life is awesome! I attend the University of Missouri (aka Mizzou) in Columbia, MO and major in Journalism with a double minor in Spanish and Psych! I'm pretty optimistic, so there isn't much you can say to me to get me down!

Some recent news about me: I'm officially a published author!

Favorites:

Movies: (in no particular order) Harry Potter, Juno, A Walk to Remember, Knocked Up, Superbad, Napoleon Dynamite, Dodgeball, December Boys, Driving Lessons, How to Deal, Apocalypto, Marie Antoinette, Saved!, and Dirty Dancing

Books: The Harry Potter series, ANYTHING by Nicholas Sparks, the sisterhood of the Traveling Pants series, the Georgia Nicholson series, One Of Those Hideous Books Where The Mother Dies, Hard Love, Stoner and Spaz , Keesha's House, The First Part Last, Summer Boys, Tropical Kiss,Forever, What My Mother Doesn't Know, Perfect, What Girls Learn, Someone Like You, Speak, Tears of a Tiger, Even Now/Ever After, This Lullaby, and That Summer (these are all fantastic books...you should definitely read them!)

T.V. Shows: pretty much anything on VH1 or MTV, Project Runway, 7th Heaven, Family Guy, America's Next Top Model, Secret Life of the American Teenager

Quotes:

Me: "I think half the people at my school are products of one-night stands." Rae: "I think half the people at my school are products of incest."

"I killed a muppet." -- Rae

"Isn't this great. Just two friends sitting in a revolving restaurant." -- Monk

"So I'm wearing these earrings today..." -- me

"School is like being pecked to death by a chicken." -- bumper sticker

"When in doubt, pull it out." -- Mr. Klaessy

"ALTO THUNDA!"

"History class is the ultimate sleep aid."

"It's none of her damn business." -- Mr. Klaessy

"Work harder--I'm on welfare." -- bumper sticker

"Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life." -- bumper sticker

me: "You're a horrible mother." Rae: "No, I'm not." me: "You're right. You're a horrible God!"

"Kate, do you feel buzzed?" -- me

"If that's what I've got to do to get a cuddle, then I'll do it." -- Ivy

"Well, I have a husband, so I really shouldn't be telling you this..." -- Ellen

"You look funny when you smoke..." -- Ryan

"Bless this fucking sandwich." -- Cody

Me: "Is that girl pregnant or is she just a fatass?"
Ellen: "It's probably safe to bet both."

"The Weasley Kids: If they don't kick your ass, their mother will." -- bumper sticker

"Grandma, I spent 100 on you. You need to LOVE me." -- Maddie, Audrey, me

"I'm HOT." -- Ivy, Maddie, me

Ivy: "I love doing makeup."
me: "I hate it, but I like doing other people's makeup."
Ivy: "I hate doing other people's makeup. I always make them look like prostitutes."
me: "You always make yourself look like a prost--."
Ivy: "I'm HOT!"

"Please don't pluck my arm hair." -- me

me: "Mr. Allison, I don't think I'm going to be able to dissect the fetal pig." Ivy: "But you can eat bacon?" me: "It's not the same. Bacon doesn't have a face, looking up at you with sad little baby pig eyes, asking, ‘Why are you cutting me open?’."

Ivy: "So, I think swim meets should become our new favorite hobby." me: "At least until swim season is over..."

“I just wanted to be held.” -- loserface “lessthanthree” Devon

“Friends are the people who hate the same assholes that you do.” -- bumper sticker

“What? I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you. I was too busy being awesome.” -- Ellen

“His enthusiasm to mate was obvious.” -- Advanced Biology video host

“MOVE, pizza.” -- Ivy

“HE’S RETARDED?!” -- Alyson

“I don’t want to win the bet, okay??” -- Kyle

“Am I seriously expected to wait ANOTHER four years??” -- Ellen

“‘Just a Gigolo’ -- get it up!” -- Ryan

Kyle: “So, how’d the dissection go?” Ellen: “We found three babies inside our shark!” Kyle: “That’s horrible!” Ellen: “Why?” Kyle: “Oh! You mean, like, baby sharks. At first, I thought you meant babies, like ‘WAAAA!!’ ones.”

“It’s really dark over here. And dat bitch stole my spoon.” -- Cody

Cam: “It’s peanut butter jelly time…” Everyone else in Gold Jazz Band: “IT’S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!!”

Me: “My lips are numb…” Brandon O.: “Blowjobs make your lips go numb?!”

“Body piercings and tattoos show early signs of schizophrenia.” -- Mrs. Gutzky

“He’s too busy being friends with baby-daddies to clean out the frickin’ car.” -- Ellen

“Sllllaaatttooonnnn.” -- Mitch

“I wonder what time it is? … AHHHH!!” -- Maddie

“So, I was just buying some cigarettes, and who walks in but Lorah…” -- Maddie

“Dude, I’ve got a secret: THE BIBLE!!” -- Jordan

“I’m telling you, Jesus would’ve been pissed. He was hungry!” -- Jordan

Me: “And he was like, ‘good night honey tty tomorrow sweet dreams’.” Chanda: “Why are you calling me honey?”

“I like your bunnage.” -- Brandon O.

Chanda: “You are officially a DDR loser.” Me: “Does that make you a DDR winner? … There is no such thing.”

“If your name is Lo’rah, can my name be Chandiquafer?” -- Chanda

“It’s like your birthday, only much, MUCH lamer.” -- Dan

“Heaven forbid they read Cosmo.” -- Dan

“Doo bah doo bah doo bah doo bah stanky poo!” -- Doug the saxophone guy from the Leahy Sextet

“Now, guys, there will be NONE of that janky Galesburg swing.” -- Doug the saxophone guy from the Leahy Sextet

“Keep it in your heart…or your trapper keeper.” -- Doug the saxophone guy from the Leahy Sextet

“His ears are so big, and his teeth, oh, man, they’re bad. He’s got a weird-shaped head, too. Oh, and he’s a snake-kisser and he had a big pimple on the back of his neck. But I’m not saying he’s ugly or anything…” -- Ivy

“Get me the f out of Disney World.” -- Ivy

"I'm not going to sponsor your...your...SEXCAPADE." -- Ivy

Kelly: (reading a Laffy Taffy wrapper) "What do you call a mean-tempered horse?" Morgan: "Your mom."

"I HAD a high heartbeat." -- Amanda

"For the sexually active, getting a period is like Christmas morning." -- bumper sticker

"Only 25 cents? Grab like...8 of them." -- random guy at work

Sports: Baseball (Go Cardinals!) and Mizzou Football (Go TIGERS!!)

Computer Games: The Sims/Sims 2/Sims 3 (any of them), Roller Coaster Tycoon

Foods: Caesar salad, pizza, McDonald's cheeseburgers (I only like the ones from Mickey D's), deviled eggs, my grandma's mac and cheese, and pickles

Dislikes:

snakes

ignorant, lazy people

people who don't deserve to have kids and treat them badly and still keep popping them out

Shakespeare (If you want to hate me for it, go right ahead.All I'm asking is, why couldn't he have spoken normal English? Also, I know this contradicts one of my favorite movies, so let me specify: I hate READING Shakespeare.Watching a movie where you can interperet it a little easier makes it so great.)

feeling fat

bad hair days

sharks/crocodiles/alligators (how about this: anything that can eat me whole)

Crocs. Enough said.

So, I've got ideas for tons o' stories. So while I get all of my thoughts on them sorted out, please bear with me, 'cause I'm doing the best I can. I'll keep you all updated on how they're coming along as best I can. Here are my newest ideas:

A Walk to Remember - It's What We've Gotta Do: Landon and Jamie's wedding...with a twist! Their parents can't accept it and their friends think they're crazy, so Landon and Jamie decide to elope...what will happen? COMPLETE!

A Walk to Remember - The Dreamer's Child: sequel of IWWGD Follow a seventeen-year-old Halia Carter as she bumps along life's road. published, work-in-progress (currently on hiatus)

Original Idea - One Time At Band Camp...Something Wonderful Happened: The story of two young people at band camp...how they met, how they fell for each other, and their story. Kind of based on how my ex-boyfriend and I got together during our marching season two years ago. (This will be located under the marching band section of the misc. category or possibly on fictionpress. btw, my screenname is "guilty-obsession" on that site!)

Okay, so I'm a VERY busy girl. I am in college. Enough said. Updating can kinda start to overwhelm me with everything that's going on. If I'm not as quick with updating as you like, please be patient. Just know that I'm trying!

Okay, I know I've only gota couple of storieson here, but I mostly write fan fiction. If you have enjoyed my writing on this site, you can read more of my work at http://www.fanfiction.net/" target="new">http://www.fanfiction.net
">www.fanfiction.net. My penname is shanelover89. Here are some more ideas I have for this site, though.

Original Idea #1 - One Time At Band Camp...Something Wonderful Happened: The story of two young people at band camp...how they met, how they fell for each other, and their story. Kind of based on how Ethan and I got together during our marching season my sophomore year of high school. (This will be located on either this site or under the marching band category of the misc. category of fanfiction.)

If you have read this entire profile without skimming, I congratulate you. I talk a lot. You'll get used to it :)

Enjoy reading what I have on here. I know I'll enjoy getting your reviews:)

~Everyone please keep writing! I love reading your stories.~


1. Run reviews
Seventeen-year-old Jaime only went for an afternoon run.
Fiction: Thriller - Rated: M - English - Horror/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,610 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 5-16-10 - Complete
2. That's No Diary It's a Journal »
My actual diary from my first year of college. Un-edited, all-truth, and sometimes graphic, these are my thoughts on life. Will be updated weekly.
Fiction: Young Adult - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,072 - Updated: 9-14-08 - Published: 9-13-08
3. 21 Things I'd Love to Tell You
21 Things I'd Love to Tell You
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 201 - Published: 9-8-08 - Complete
4. Throw Me In reviews
A parody of the tune "Take Me Out to the Ballgame." It's not supposed to be taken seriously, so please, no flames.
Poetry: Humor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 89 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7-2-06
5. The Last Two reviews
It's all so overwhelming...
Poetry: Life - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 105 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6-5-06
6. We Never Thought
They went out drinking. They didn't think anything would happen. And that was the real tragedy.
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 164 - Published: 5-25-06
7. No Risk of Heartbreak reviews
Maybe your first time would be better with someone you don't know. That way, there's no feeling behind it and you won't be too disappointed when the relationship never happens... Please read and review!
Poetry: Life - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 165 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4-21-06
8. A Hold on My Emotions reviews
Just a poem I wrote for English about a realtionship I was in. Please read and review!
Poetry: Love - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 120 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4-21-06
9. The Reunion reviews
Craig and Bridget had dated all through high school, when she left for college and he left for the military. Due to a miscommunication, they had both thought that they had found someone else, and they didn't talk again. Now it's their 10-year reunion.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 232 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4-19-06
10. First Time reviews
Halley and Eric have been dating for over a year, and they still haven't had sex. What will happen when Halley invites him over and they are unsupervised? Read to find out! Please review. Note: One-shot unless I'm asked to go on with the story.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,070 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 4-19-06
11. Anthem reviews
Here's an essay I wrote after I read Anthem by Ayn Rand. Tell me what you think!
Fiction: Essay - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 775 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4-19-06
12. You Who? reviews
Just a dialogue I wrote for English one morning. I hope you like it! Please read and review! Note: One-shot.
Fiction: Humor - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 350 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 4-19-06
13. One Special Night reviews
Eli Clarke couldn't have been more nervous. Morgan Powell couldn't have been more naive. A night on the beach leads to the rest of their lives. Please read and review! Note: This is a one-shot unless I get asked to go on further with it.
Fiction: Romance - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,127 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4-19-06