Name: Wangan Yu.
Age: 13.
Gender: Female, thank you very much.
Eyes: Mudbrown. Small.
Hair: Black. And thick. No fringe. Pretty long.
Height: Ugh...average? I really have no idea. Okay, it's...5ft 4.3 inches. Don't look at me like hat, I just found out like two seconds ago!
Address: I don't know yet. I'M MOVING TO SAN DIEGO!!!
Okay, let's cut to the chase. Quotes that are weird, random, profound, whacky, or whatever, by me and my friends. Here goes.
Me
School has found a way to end and make me miserable.
No!!! The rainbow circle!!
Note lack of enthusiasm.
Pain doesn't hurt when it's all you've ever felt.
Note fake enthusiasm.
RAINBOW CIRCLE!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was starting to think a gator got you.
I have to go bratsit my brother.
Hey! Take out your earplugs!
I have no tears...
He was so...talkative when we were young. Ha, 'when we were young.' I think I'm getting all nostalgic again. I think it's the Moving On Ceremony.
Sometimes, what's best isn't what's popular, and what's popular isn't what's best. Usually, okay, ALWAYS, in fact.
OMGSH, so you didn't fake your own death!
Only a fool is sure.
Ew, I stepped in gum!
When life hands you lemons, make blueberry acai. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
Okay, now my head is really starting to hurt.
I have somehow awakened an innate instinct that I have hidden for five years. And now it is clawing at me.
Butterscotch ice cream...NOOOO! It's melting! Damn you weather, Daaaaaammmnn YOU!!!!!!!
My sweat glands are getting overworked, here!
Just wait one minute...-sticks head in fridge- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Didn't work. -Sticks head in cabinet- -SCREEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAM-
In a nutshell, I'm not conceded - You're just WRONG!
Shut the hypocritical pie hole or I will.
I saw a dead rat.
DROP IT. DROP THE BOMB NOW.
Whoever said love and hate were two different things needs to get air holes drilled into their heads.
You sure this person doesn't have a degree in gibberish? I'll bet they majored in gibberish.
You're sane? OMGSH!!
When you're locked in a room full of homicidal crazy people, it is best not to make any loud noises or address them at all. Hm. Now I know why Richard is so quiet all the time.
Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness needs to give themself a dope slap.
Dark is just the other side of light. And it's a thousand times better there.
Time numbs the pain but the memory's still there.
If honesty is the best policy, I'm a used band aid.
Who said giving your heart away was a bad thing?
CHIPMUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like finding a chunk of malachite.
What's wrong with proper English, apart from the fact that you don't know it????
I'm the sane and smart one with the overachieving dad.
I like to blurt out all my secrets when I'm lonely. I've found people come back when I do.
Don't think. It's bad for your health.
Turn into a vampire!!
-throttles bat- I think I killed it. See? I would make a wonderful Fate.
Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Wow, I have great lung capacity.
Mexican food makes me throw up.
What can I say? Computers hurt my head.
My forehead is never big.
Emily
NATHAN IS HARASSING ME!
GAR.
Jerry
Be good and hit Doris over the head for me.
I got my ears pierced.
I live a life of sin but it's all right. I don't give a damn.
I don't play your rules, I make my own.
Are you dead?
Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death!
Are you talking to yourself...again.
Lets keep notes on who pisses me off.
Make the stupid people shut up.
Cute but psycho things even out.
Hattie where´s cheese bert??
I'm what the bunny says.
I live over the rainbow and down the rabbit hole.
Love means never having to say sorry.
What did we say about killing people?? Remember, you're trying not to do that anymore.
Doris
I have PMS and a gun. Did you have something to say?
Lily is dead.
Marc (Not really a friend, he's Doris' brother)
Now I know why there are so many taxis in New York! Most of them aren't taxis!
Alice
Tell me, baby, who do you wanna be?
Haha, I'm popular.
Moshing should be a professional sport.
He doesn't seem to want to join in this harmless banter...
She, he, it's all the same.
My goal in life is to annoy as many people as possible. I feel it's going fairly well...
Back. With my cool gloves.
Nooo cool trousers!
Eliza is my pet!
Um, this isn't actually Alice, everyone!!
I think that was a prank call...
My hands are cold...
God save the queen. She ain't no human being.
Oh dear, what have I gone and done now?
Sing me to sleep, daddy.
AHHH!! DEEP FRIED TOUFOO!!
I LOVE ARM BANDS !!
Hannah
I almost wished you loved me too.
EVERYONE GET BEBO.
HE'S ALIVE!
Tears don't fall. They crash around me.
SO DIE ALL PLASTICS AND CHAVS.
I am in a violent mood.
It's hard being so blonde!
The music burns...BURNS.
I'm drinking ice cream through a straw...well, trying...
I wish I had a friend.
30 STICKS OF SHERBERT!
I could be your pet vampire! It all fits together...
I took a picture of my shoe.
I'm sorry that I like talking. It's not my fault I'm dumb.
My computer made me leave...
Life is but a dream for the dead.
Soap...
No blood. Need blood on my homework...
I AM DUMB.
Your history is mine.
TAKE THAT! DIE!!
Thank you for the venom.
Welcome to the bat parade.
Being shut up is boring.
I don't make much sense.
Richard
I think I am here. But I'm not too sure.
Are we actually talking about anything?
I'm Chuck.
Neil
I'm just another person to fall into the Grim Reaper's hands.
I'm a deep person.
I live at 667. Next door to 666.
There is a boy here.
I feel like I don't exist.
You have broken me. Now I'm going to break you.
Lucy
I'M LONELY.
Charlee
I'm not a meanie, you're just a sissy because nobody likes you.
Emma
I'm lost in thought and seeing as it's unfamiliar territory, I might be gone for a while.
I poke
Anita
Ghosts are even better than kids.
Loving is giving, and giving is loving, even though all I want to give is hatred.
Poor pianos!
I could dance with you until the cows come home...On second thought, I'd rather dance with cows when you come home.
白云深处有人家
---
Me: Bebo??? You really can't spell. Either that or you've been secretly studying gibberish. Which isn't possible because you're already fluent.
Hannah: Bebo.
Anita: Your mom can't be that bad.
Me: Your's must be very disappointed to have a nutcase for a daughter.
Me: Hey, RICHARD!!!!! You being held hostage by some maniac, or did a crazy man steal your keyboard?
Richard: I think both.
Me: Was it the same man?
Hannah: IT WAS YOU AN, WASN'T IT? HOW COULD YOU?
Me: Um...no, of course not...-shifty eyes-
Richard: Yes.
Me: Well school's out and I'm bored! Nyah nyah.
Hannah: -swearword-
Anita: No. No. Mo. Mo. No.
Me: Someone skipped out on their hospital checkup...
Me: She just called you a mother...Feel free to punish her in front of us!
Sarah: Who??
Alice: It was An.
Me: Alice.
Alice: I swear it wasn't me! She made me!
Sarah: I WILL KILL YOU!
Me: Yes, it was...your inner demon. Not.
Alice: It was! His name is Marcus. I feel so rejected.
Me: Welcome to another episode of Alice Makes Up Random Excuses.
Sarah: How come you said 'she made me,' then called him Marcus??
Me: He's a hermaphrodite!
Alice: Huh??
Me: -sigh- A hermaphrodite is an animal that changes genders a number of times throughout its life.
Alice: Wow, I wanna be a hermaphrodite!!
Jerry: You go and be one, Alice.
Alice: Yes, yes I will.
Me: Note to self: Next time people don't know the meaning of a word, it's for the better. If they don't know what it means, they can't use it.
Me: -tastes ice cream- -gasp- This isn't butterscotch!! It's toffee!!!!! This is an outrage! I must sue!!! Wait...-looks back at box- Tooooofffeeeeeeeee Riippppllllllllllleeesss...Never mind...
Alice: Arc. Hm...kinda boring.
Me: At least it's a word. And most three letter words ARE boring. That's why only three letters want to be in them.
Jerry: Now who would miss me, An?
Me: Not me.
Alice: I don't like it. Sports Day was canceled.
Me: Unless 'sports' is code for something, it doesn't sound very fun.
Alice: Wow, I'm a bit obsessed with names today.
Me: Hey, you're talking to a person who has a name bank!
Alice: Wow! A name bank! Like a normal bank but with names instead of money!
Me: Pretty much! With origins and meanings. Some I made up though...
Alice: Hm...I have nothing that cool...I have some pink and black shoes though..
Hannah: I have very good English skills.
Me: You keep telling yourself that...
Hannah: Doctor Who. On Friday. It's a miracle! -runs out of room- It's not on...It's not on. -starts rolling around on the floor-
Me: Don't look at me! I didn't do anything! This bottle I'm holding is NOT Essence of Insanity!
Me: Just Alice.
Alice: Hey, that's my name. Alice...
Me: You passed the hearing test.
Alice: WHOOP!
Jerry: Wow.
Me:Wow?
Jerry: Yes, An, wow.
Me: What, the big words give Jewy a headachey?
Alice: Have either of you heard of the Smashing Pumpkins??
Me: 'Either of you'? Who else is here? -looks around- AHH!!
Me: I wanna pet python.
Jerry: Then buy one off eBay!
Me: PYTHON.
Jerry: EBAY.
Me: By the way, just before you left for Paraguay, John Bosco said you owed him money like 20 bucks or something.
Jerry: The only thing I owe him is a punch to the nose.
Sarah: It's so quiet.
Me: I know!
Alice: I know. Too quiet...
Me: It'll be so much fun to ruin it!
Hannah: I see...
Jerry: You do? That makes one of us!
Me: You people don't know anything!
Jerry: I know my ABC. Abcdhhdsvgjsghgbagsd7ggrbatdghjgjjhgsdfsjnusdfvb. See?
Alice: Now I know my ABC, let's all do the 123.
Me: 1234567890!
Sarah: 1234567890!
Jerry: No, it's: fgtnaejghhgbahfdgbajfgnajhgghjhsfjhgsfhqeyr742y76y72567157tyhugy3thgq7y1430u68123456789101112131554894.
Me: Do I know her???
Hannah: No...
Me: Did Richard go in a coma?
Richard: No.
Me: Oh, too bad. I mean, that's great!
Me: Someone's going nuts.
Jerry: A lot of them are.
Alice: Hm, what should I say to the Neil dude?
Me: Hmm, you should say, "How're you doing, hammerhead?"
Sarah: Webster just barked!
Me: I thought Webster was a dictionary but dictionaries don't bark...
Hannah: My head hurts from all the people talking...
Me: Yeah really, could people be any louder? Wait, it's just me.
Lucy: I'm lonely.
Me: When I'm lonely, I go blurt out all Jerry's secrets.
Sarah: Did you know that it is six months today since Richard and I have been together?
Me: Wow, you are obsessed! In a good way.
Alice: Hmm I wonder where that Jerry chap has got to...
Me: I did NOT put him in a coma. I repeat. I DID NOT.
Jerry: Hey there.
Me: How did you get out of your coma? Uh...not that he was in one...
Neil: Oh.
Me: Yeah...
Jerry: So, cats and dogs?
Hannah: Oh gosh. You think my mum will notice that I broke a glass?
Me: Uh, yeah.
Sarah: Yes!
Me: If she can notice her son's undergarments strewn across his bedroom floor, she can notice a broken glass.
Alice: I guess I'm afraid to try to listen to...um...Hilary Duff.
Me: I did. I threw up. End of story.
Neil: I have to go. Time for A SHOWER.
Jerry: Have fun, send a post card.
Me: Point to the horizon, Captain!
Jerry: Right, who is the captain again??
Me: Uh...not you, you have terrible leadership skills.
Neil: MCR.
Me: Please do not string together those three letters. We don't want to start an uproar.
Me: OMGSH SHUSH RICHARD IS SPEAKING!!
Richard: I am confused.
Me: -_-
Jerry: Wtf?
Me: Go wash your mouth with lye soap, Jerry!
Alice: Ugh, that wouldn't taste very nice...
Jerry: I don't have soap.
Neil: Ah, don't worry.
Me: Worry? Worry isn't in my dictionary! Probably cuz it doesn't know any English...
Me: No more OMGSHes-
Richard: Hannah said I would suit glasses.
Me: OMGSH Richard talks again!
Jerry: In the time it takes for me to die, you will already be in hell waiting for me.
Me: Jerry? I LIVE in Hell, okay? And I won't be waiting for you. I'd be burglaring Lucifer himself!! And totally getting away with it.
Neil: Oh dear. Muse is one of the biggest bands in England.
Me: Who are you again?
Neil: Me Neil. Alice's mate.
Me: Ah. Still don't know who you are. But I'm willing to let that slide.
Lucy: Me have no love.
Me: Me no want no love...none of you breathe a word.
Jerry: Why is it that whenever love goes wrong, nothing else seems to go right??
Me: Because the one you love becomes your everything, and when you lose them, you are robbed of your essence
Alice: No...he'll freak out...
Me: I haven't seen anybody freak out since I sneaked on Tony with a knife! I mean...a, toy!
Neil: I crap at English.
Me: I know. That sentence wasn't grammatically correct.
Me: Trust me.
Jerry: Why should I trust you?
Me: You shouldn't.
Jerry: ...But you just said, 'trust me'!
Me: You shouldn't have believed me!
Hannah: How be you?
Me: I be fine. I be trying to find my grammar check. I normally have it built in. It be gone.
Jerry: Are Doris and Artie still going out?
Me: One of them dumped the other, remember?...I'm telling a goldfish to remember...
Neil: How can you forget me?
Jerry: Like this. Who are you again??
Me: I wanna be a Fate.
Hannah: Fate?
Me: You know, Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos? In the Greek Myths. One spins the thread of life, the other decides what happens in somebody's life, and the last cuts the thread and makes the person die.
Jerry: Which one would you be??
Me: I'd be Atropos. I'd cut all the threads at once and watch the people fall like cornstalks in a field.
Jerry: Something is not right here...I know you're still alive.
Me: I am still alive! I just like Hell better. No sappy people.
Hannah: Something is ringing...
Me: Your head?
Hannah: THE PHONE.
Doris: Does the world hate me?
Me: Nooo. The world hates me. Me. Me, not you. Me. Me. Okay, I think I got the message across.
Neil: Hello!
Me: Oh! So you didn't die?
Neil: No, not yet.
Me: Oh. Just tell me when and I'll be counting the seconds!
Me: GOD THAT STUPID UNREASONABLE SELFISH IDIOTIC STINKING SKANK JUST MAKES ME WANNA RIP OUT HER SPINE AND MAKE HER EAT IT!!!! ...Sorry, just thinking about the skank.
Alice: Oh, um that's okay.
Me: What do you see yourself doing ten years in the future.
Richard: I'm not sure.
Me: Okay. Just thought you might have some goals tucked in there. -hammers head with knuckles- Ow.
Alice: I've got a throat infection. So I had soup. You know what's nice? Sprinkles on toast.
Me: Banana marshmallow mushroom peanut butter on toast...Who says I'm too serious??
Alice: Lolly.
Me: Buttered ice cream.
Alice: Nacho sauce and minstrels.
Me: Umm...Lamb chops! Broken planet watch.
Alice: Apron ducks.
FictionPress.com - let the words flow
