AN: I just realized that I had anonymous reviews blocked. You have no idea how much that depressed me especially when I saw that almost 300 people checked my story out. Its been fixed now, but its like too little too late ya know? Anyway, since I saw how much love my story was gettin (or would have) I've decided to try and hurry up with updates. But it actually is important for ya'll to either read my AN's in the stories or check out my profile 'cause like I said, I AM EXTREMELY LAZY. So I'ma try for ya'll but don't expect much.

LIL INFO 'BOUT ME:

My Name: also one of my fav. types of music

Gender: hint- it ends with an e

Age: a 2 digit number

Height: tall

Weight: too much

Income: not enuff

Eyes: a color

Hair: a different color

Ethnicity: a darker color

Fav. Color: another color

Fav. Authors: Laurell K. Hamilton, J.R. Ward, L.A. Banks, Lori Handeland, Sherrilyn
Kenyon, Kim Harrison, Linda Howard, Gena Showalter, Patricia Briggs, Karen Chance, Keri Arthur

Fav. Books:

Obsidian Butterfly and Stroke of Midnight and Danse Macbre- Laurell K. Hamilton

Night Embrace and Dance With the Devil and Night Play- Sherrilyn Kenyon

Lover Eternal- J.R. Ward

The Bitten- L.A. Banks

Blue Moon- Lori Handeland

Blood Bound- Patricia Briggs

Kissing Sin- Keri Arthur

Charmed By Shadow- Karen Chance

Every Which Way But Dead- Kim Harrison

Awaken Me Darkly- Gena Showalter

Mr. Perfect- Linda Howard

Fav. Music: R&B, Hip Hop, Some Rock, Jazz, Soundscapes, and Oldies.

Fav. Avtivity: Reading, Writing, Daydreaming, Chillin w/ma friends, Watchin movies, Playin cards/games,

Fav. Websites: Yahoo.com, Barnes&Noble.com, Myspace.com, FanFiction.net

Fav. Quotes: 'But I do nothing upon myself, and yet am mine own Executioner.' -Mark Twain

'For the Angel of Death spread his wings on the blast,
And breathed in the face of the foe as he passed;
And the eyes of the sleepers waxed deadly and chill,
And their hearts but once heaved, and for ever grew still!' -Lord Byron

'Let us swear while we may, for in heaven it will not be allowed.' -Mark Twain

I'm... pessimistic, impatient, apathetic, a smartass, cheap, what ma teachers call "brutally honest", tempermental, lazy, weird, anti-social. To sum it all up, I'm Complicated.

JOKES FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT _

Women's English:

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry

We need = I want

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

You're ... so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot

You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs

Do you love me= I'm going to ask for something expensive

How much do you love me= I did something today that you're really not going to like

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV

Is my butt fat= Tell me I'm beautiful

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me

Are you listening to me= Too late, you're dead

Men's English:

I'm hungry = I'm hungry

I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy

I'm tired = I'm tired

Do you want to go to a movie= I'd eventually like to have sex with you

Can I take you out to dinner= I'd eventually like to have sex with you

Can I call you sometime= I'd eventually like to have sex with you

May I have this dance= I'd eventually like to have sex with you

Nice dress = Nice breasts!

You look tense, let me give you a massage = I'm trying to feel you up

What's wrong= I guess sex tonight is out of the question

I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?

I love you = Let's have sex now

I love you, too = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!

Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me

Will you marry me= I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys

I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together = I am gay

Who's Boss?

When the Lord made man, all the parts of the body argued over who would be boss.
The brain explained that since he controlled all the parts of the body, he should be boss.
The legs argued that since they took man wherever he wanted to go, he should be boss.
The stomach countered with the explanation that since he digested all the food, he should be boss.
The eyes said that without them, man would be helpless, so he should be boss.
Then the ass hole applied for the job...
The other parts of the body laughed so hard that the ass hole became mad and closed up.
After a few days, the brain went foggy, the legs got wobbly, the stomach was ill, the eyes got crossed and unable to see.
They all conceded and made the ass hole boss.
This proves that you don't have to be a brain to be a boss. Just an asshole.

10 Ways to Get Fired

1) Whenever answering the phone, and its for your boss, say "He's under his desk screwing his secretary. Can I take a message?"

2) Strip off all your clothes. Complain about how hot it is in the office, regardless of the temperature.

3) When your boss is on the phone scream "Dammit! I'm expecting a call! Stay off the phone!"

4) If your boss bumps into you, start screaming sexual harassment. Talk in great lengths about the state laws on harassment. Get the authorites involved. Threaten to sue.

5) Sleep with your boss's daughter. Videotape it. Pass out copies around the office. Brag about how easy she was.

6) Steal various office equipment (pencils, staplers, desks). Frame your boss for it.

7) When asked to do something start laughing hysterically. Continue this for five minutes. Calm down and say, "Oh, you were being serious?"

8) Loosen the bolts on the boss's chair.
Laugh loudly when he/she falls down. Play innocent.

9) Whenever the boss starts to tell you a story, interrupt him/her with a story of your own. Make sure the story is boring and has no point whatsoever.

10) Send a dozen roses to your boss's house when their spouse is home. Sign an ex-flames name on the card. Next day, ask him/her how their evening was. Be obvious

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Author's Note: The way I write is that I won't write it if I, myself, wouldn't read it. As you might be able to tell, if my favorite authors and books are any indication, I like paranormal murder mystery suspense filled action packed romances. I need at least 3 outta 5 to read a book, so thats pretty much all I do and am ever gonna write. And once again I'm reeeaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyy lazy so it'll take me awhile to update ma crap, but I promise I'm a good writer, I'm just extremely lazy; so bare wit me.

Also: look for me on Fanfiction and check out my stories there. I have the same name, so just look for Obsidian Tigress.