Well, I don't know if anyone actually reads these things, but I thought I'd make an effort -grin-

I scribbled up a silly profile using an animal classification as a model. Laugh at it because its dumb and because it might help you to understand the extent of my crazy.

Error-Author- Commonly known as ‘Kayla’

Order: Writer

Family: Fiction

Species: Man-love

Habitat

The ErrorAuthor enjoys a solitary living, preferring to spend its days wandering in quiet contemplation. It is a ‘diurnal animal’- that is, active during the daylight hours. At night, it attempts to rest for eight hours before beginning its daytime routine.

At daybreak, the ErrorAuthor awakens and begins its forage for food and creative materials to add to its collection of fiction. It is a passive animal prone to random outbursts that are usually result of excess caffeine.

Food and Feeding

When the day breaks through the window of the ErrorAuthor’s den, it immediately begins its routine. It awakens to consume its first meal of the day. Most of the time it enjoys a balance of cereals, fruits or toasts. Some days, however, it deviates to chocolate or chicken noodle soup. After its meal, the regime of coffee consumption begins and continues until midday when its energy supplies run low and it feeds again. Occasionally it will repeat this cycle for the evening but it often ends up too spent from the morning effort.

Did You Know?

- The ErrorAuthor can consume 8+ cups of coffee a day without passing into unconsciousness or caffeine-related coma.

- If disturbed while in its moments of caffeine induced creativity, the ErrorAuthor can become either aggressive or completely unaware the visitor is even there.

- The ErrorAuthor is often very shy about its work and is hesitant to explain it to old people in cafés that approach, asking about it.

Related Species

The ErrorAuthor is closely related to the hetero-romance writers in the category of original fiction. The difference lies in its typical protagonist and love interest characters- they are both male as opposed to the more common fiction containing one male and one female character.

Natural Enemies

Being a passive species, it tends not to make a lot of enemies. One of the few it actively peruses with aggression, however, is the species of Fan-Fiction Writer. Researches are not sure why, but they have speculations the lack of originality and mangling of the original fiction the Fan-Fiction Writers tend to butcher is what sets the ErrorAuthor off to become aggressive. Again, as it is found the ErrorAuthor is a passive species, it tries to avoid the Fan-Fiction territories all together.

Statistics

Born on January 5, 1989, this particular ErrorAuthor goes by the real name of Kayla. She continues to reside in her birth place of Manitoba, Canada.

She took a real interest in fiction in 2004. Since then, her interest in the hobby has increased exponentially until it becoming what it is today: A strange obsession.

Oddly enough, the writing has slightly warped her mind- even so far as to allow her to believe she may one day make a living out of her writing. Researchers, however, know from other studied cases that writers who follow this outlandish belief often perish under bridges, huddled in cardboard boxes, chewing on old shoes for sustenance. The lack of income they tend to experience is often their downfall- following their craft loyally to the bitter end.

Hobbies

ABJD's (Have two with another on the way), horses (er, four lol to be fair, my dad is the cowboy of the family), Writing (... Yeah, that's something in common with a lot of people here on FP hey?), drinking eight cups of caffeine a day, lighting too much incense in my room and getting ill, leaning over candles and accidentally setting the tips of my hair on fire, slipping into multipersonalities, suffering from frequent retarded anxiety over stupid things, and many more.

FICTION WARNINGS

Disclaimers: Unrealistic happenings, mysterious lacks of plot, dodgy characters, a suspicious lack of female characters, a surplus of homosexual romance, often confusing proceedings, uneven chapter lengths, disappearing secondary characters, people with issues, odd male PMS, stuttering, and quite a lot of gay.

Warning: May cause nosebleeds, squealing, character attachment, and/or itchy, tired eyes. The author does not endorse an unhealthy lack of bathroom breaks and uneven nutrition/hydration while reading. Not for the following people types: Ignorant, Close-Minded Types, Homophobes, Younger Audiences, Older Audiences, and Caffeine-Sensitive Individuals.

I appreciate any criticism and will do my best to fix anything suggested. Add me on msn if you want, I'm friendly, if a little insane, heh. ( error_author@hotmail.com )

I do not respond well to flamers. I think flaming is a utterly childish act. I will not try to justify myself nor will I get angry and flame you back. You will recieve no reply and will be blocked and reported. Please, let's be mature adults, here.

Some of the Best Work on Fiction Press

ObscenelyAboveAverage - lurvely lurvely stories here folks; lots of pretty boys in fun scene set ups, oh yes. Be warned, you start, you get addicted. Home for boys, vampires, and sexy characters, Oh my!

Sychaeus - Trill has the most fabulous down to earth way of writing that makes you just connect with her work. The 'real' factor in her work is so refreshing and mix a little manlove in there? You got yourself another addiction!

Deaths Requiem - Looking for an epic? Here is a world, a species, and touchable real characters all created from scratch. Take a wander into Etherworld and prepare to be ensnared and spellbound. Or, on the flip scale, looking for a pretty city boy with an attitude trapped at summer camp? Whatever suits your fancy, she's got it on her page.