7/4- Um...so it's currently 1:08 in the morning now. Um, woah. (I should seriously consider adopting a human sleeping pattern -shrugs-) Oh Well! Lalala. So um, I'm posting an update on Dude, Where's My Cat, because the newest chap should be out tommorow. Seriously, it's a wopper, ringing in at over 6,000+ words. Yeah, I know. But um...I'm going to post a little excerpt to tide you over till tomorrow. It's surprisingly popular...lol.
“I want each of you to spit into the cup.” He ordered—receiving a few skeptical glares. But everyone listened, and respectively took a spit for the water. Casper did his clean and quick, followed by me. I couldn’t give either way, so wasn’t embarrassed by having to try a few times for anything to come out. If Casper thought anything of it, he didn’t comment.
Coach paused dramatically, a small smile on his lips. “You two just had sex.” I smiled slightly at Jammie’s red face from the desk over. Odd number of genders blew. “I want you two to now take a sip from the water.”
6/25- Um, so I just snagged myself a beta. Which, is a really good thing for someone as grammatically challenged as me! The lovely, Twist Their Emotions has offered to take on the task. They are wonderful. Go give them much love, and reviews. (And by the off chance you're reading my bio, thanks again. This is helping a load.)
3/13- Hey, we changed our pen-name, so if you used to know us by "Falling-December" we're now A Box of Sharp Objects. :) So no need to be confuzzleded my preeiities
About me (Ed): I'm a 5'2 kid with really dirty blond hair. I have a shit load of layers. They are cool. I say they are. End.
My eyes are this weird ass colour of gray and brown having sex with blue and then cheating on gold, and basically this silvery thing. They are also cool. I'm going to dye my hair bleached blond soon...yay. Fun stuff right there peeps. My humour is dry. I'm sarcastic, and I can be mean at times. Not because I intentionally hurt people, but because i'm blunt. About as blunt as a spoon.
And...I pretty much love writing and art. Art came first on the talent scale, though (I've always been able to draw) and I've always been writing, but it was sort of kind of recent that I realized, "Not crap at this, not crap at this, not complete crap at this. Score." Life altering revelations. They're cool. Try it some time.
My occupation is hibernating for the winter. If I had to choose I would be a transformer and be all "Bang bang bang," and then all, "Vvrroom, vshew, ping ping, " and then be all like, "ERRR!!". You know what. I'd just fly.
I would be Optimus Prime. My lover would be Bumblebee. Shut the fuck up. You may not comment. My income would be 3.33 a week. I could buy altoids. Yay.
May I offer you some Listerine Birthcontrol? Effective, and delicous!
No? Well...
Perhaps Altoid Viagra is more your cuppa tea huh? Even more effective ;)
No again?...
WELL. -points lasergun-
Dead.
The most effective of them all.
Likes: Um...my friends.
Karl
Gay people
Guys ;) (That one's a good one)
The music I whore off my friends
The movies I whore off my friends
The clothing I whore (steal/barrow) off my friends.
Dislikes: Humans as a general race
Conservative Christians
Dollar Tree
K-Mart
People who preach their beliefs to you
The colour purple (don't know why, but I just don't really like it)
Double standards
Status: Currently single
Orientation: straight
Sign: Sag.
Belief: Um...God? I don't have a labeled one. But I do believe in God
Location: Turlkeslavania...T_T Um...maybe...fucked in, Georgia?
Age: Old enough ;)
HEY! I finally decided to put something up here , so here is a quiz!!
1 - My ex...
Uh...yeah. Derek was his name, um...nothing was his game. Don't know. But that's him -shrugs-.
2 - Maybe I should...
stop being...so damn awsome? Too wonderfully fantabulously gorgeous for your eyes to take all in one shot? I know ;)
3 - I love...
FOOD. SlEEP. SWEEDISH FISH!! (not all in that order...of course.)
4 - People would say that i'm...
Sarcastic and blunt. -sighs-
5 - I don't understand...
um...basically most things social...
Clarification: Social things that involve guys.
6 - When i wake up in the morning...
I go back to sleep? Shoot a monkey? -shrugs-
7 - I lost...
My wooden snake T_T. I'm actually quite pissed at this one.
8 - Life is full of...
BETCHES!!
9 - My past is...
Full of awkward moments, bad experiences, and a helluva a lot of immature moments. The fuck was it fun though ;)
10 - I get annoyed when...
someone complains about their weight (when they know they're skinny as all hell combined and then shoved on a sandwich) just so that you say "no you're not." Seriously. If you're fat. You're fat. Get some exercise K? M'kay.
11 - Parties are...
Loud...and awkward. Unless you're with your friends...or stoned? Fun too.
12 - I wish...
My temper wasn't a bitch. I've named her Caryl, and she's a nasty little whore. Die Caryl. Die.
13 - Dogs...
Stupid. But cute. They're like boys...:)
14 - Cats...
are going to eat us. I hope they get fat, and just...just get so fat that they...yeah.
15 - Tomorrow...
I'll probaly kick it with some friends :/
16 - I have low tolerance...
for...anything with the Dollar Tree logo. Hate that store. A lot T_T.
17 - If I had a million dollars...
I'd...get a boob job, a nose job, um...anything that has to do with 'preserving' your youth. So. I guess that's pretty much everything with botox, and um...face lifts perhaps? And just for precaution's sake, I'd get liphosuction. And um. I'd become a singer (but since I can't sing, I'd just higher a producer that can make it seem like I can sing.)
Nah. Ha ha har. So just joking. But no, I'd just like...I don't know. Shove it in a bank or something?
18 - I'm totally terrified...
of the dark. And SPIDERS!!
NUMBAH B+
1 - YOUR REAL NAME:
The dullest name you will ever hear T_T
2 - YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first three letters of your name and izzle)
= emiizzle
3 - YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
= red pheonix
4 - YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live on)
= marie bramble...hahaha
5 - YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
= demem
6 - YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (your 2nd favorite color, and favorite drink)
= black vault
7 - YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, and last letter of your mom's)
= Mmeusan
8 - YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (your parent's middle names)
= cutler joseph
9 - YOUR GOTH NAME: (bloody and your pet's name)
= bloody fuzzhead (haha, so not kidding)
Will have more later, promise. M'kay? M'kay.
Thank you for showin up my children. You are not only like...my gerbils or something, but also my...my sled dog team or whatever. You keep me going. So...Keep it chillin', and don't die.
Visit again, and maybe this baby will be pimped -shrugs- who knows? I don't. Lalala.
I'ma gonna go make me a nice Pecan Pie!