Extremely Fexcellant! Thing of the Week: summer...ahh...

Hi. I'm Fred. (Not Weasley. Sorry.) Not much to say...although you must be pretty bored to be reading this. Almost as bored as I am to be writing this.

Current song rolling through my head: "Better Together" by Jack Johnson
Current book being read: The Lunatic Cafe by LAurell K. Hamilton
Last movie watched: The Proposal

Out of pure boredom (and because I have a thing for quotes), here're some of my favorites.

Pacha: AH! Demon llama!

Kenny: Mi lama es muy picante. (My llama is very spicy.)

Jen: Miscengination; that wasn't s'posed to happen!

Me: Do they have a name for this era?
Laura: CHEEZIT!!
Me: Oh, okay.

Mrs. Duncan: What was the main cash crop grown in India?
Me: Opium!!

Mrs. D: Where did African slaves come from?
Class: AFRICA!!

Laura: -slaps down water bottle- Ha, your water broke!
Jen: Anything you'd like to tell us?
Me: I raped Justin Timberlake and am having his baby!

Tucker (on a newspaper worknight): Mrow. Mrrrrrrroooooooow. Mmmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooowww.

Godley: Derka, derka!

Godley: Gigglegiggle gigglegiggle. Gigglegiggle, gigglegigglegiggle. Giggle.

Ally: We go to the bathroom as a family!

Tucker: Excuse me, I am raising my hand!

Foote: -holding a black marker and a brown marker- How black is Jim, this black or this black?!

Chaya (in reference to telling this other school's newspaper, where they yelled at each other and lived in mortal fear of their adviser, about our newspaper): It was like telling a child from a third world country how great America is!

Jen: Birka NO!

Godley (in strong Indian accent): Dat wuz not part of agreement. I wuz told...

Mr. Varas: Ew, a bug!

Lauren: I throw my mohawk at you!

Godley: Dat one wuz good...

Newspaper T-shirt: NO means YES ... (just kidding)

Other Newspaper T-shirt: I promise your daughter will be safe with me...

Will: Damn diggity damn!

Me: WILL, STOP HICCUPING!! WHY ARE YOU HICCUPING?!
DJ: You hiccup when your stomach is trying to move back into place.
Me: Really? Wow... -drools-

Jordan: Pen-island spells penis-land. I didn't know that!

Sidebottom (talking about my autistic brother): Oh, so he's like House, but with an excuse.
Me: -falls out of chair- Exactly!

Lauren: Antonio was hot, you're average pimple.

Beth: Thou shalt not text-message during boom-boom.

Tucker: He fell into a well. Lassie had to get him out. It took a while.

Radio: The human race is a mystery wrapped in an enigma.
Andrew: Covered in secret sauce.

Me (from Jen/Latin textbook): The servant girl pleases the cook.
Godley: What if the cook is gay?
Me: Then the servant girl is a drag queen.
Godley: Touche.

Nick: I think Mexicans always go to heaven by climbing over the gates.

Nathan (after his five minute demonstration/speech on how to put up a tent): And so, this is a tent.

Super Condensed version of Huckleberry Finn (as condensed by the lovely condensers at Book-A-Minute Classics):
Huck Finn: (goes rafting) (goes home) THE END

"'Light fuse and get away' may work for a Roman Candle, but not so much for the wrath of a woman scorned."

"Someone's boring me. I think it's me."

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."

"So you see, imagination needs moodling- long, inefficient, happy idling, dawdling and puttering."

"Well, speaking as a completely objective third party observer with absolutely no personal interest in the matter..."

"Some settling may occur. That's probably what Columbus told the Indians."

"Hey! O'Connell! Looks to me like I got all the horses!"
"Hey, Bennie! Looks to me like you're on the wrong side of the river!"

"I shall simply deny you the crown and-live...forever."

"We fixed you- me and the nuns."

"That's because you were taken in by the BBC! Filthy British lies! But did they ever say a bad word against Churchill? Churchill, UGH! With his cigars and his brandy and his rotten paintings. ROTTEN! Hitler, now there was a painter. He could do an entire apartment in one afternoon; two coats."

"You're the diet coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough."

"How would you beat him?"
"With a stick, while he slept."

"Ford?"
"Yes?"
"I think I'm a sofa."
"I know how you feel."

"I think I'll be safe with a nice toffee...Alas. Earwax."

"Life is just one damned thing after another."

That's all for now. Sorry it was so long. But come on- who doesn't want to talk about llamas?

Oh, yeah, one more thing. Although my name is Fred, I am a chick...just so you know. It's a long story of how I got that nickname that happens to do with science and biological isotopes and a lot of other things that get extremely complicated. So...yeah.