Fuck yeah, I'm a snail, chilling on your arm and not giving a fuck about anything because I'm a snail. --Jess

I am...

The Goddess of Fluffiness and Kittens (only on very specific occasions in The Literate Union) . Cappy (Lurker’s Paradise) . Lovely (Pep) . KittyKitty (Blake) . Bast (Rachel) . Fluffy (Oz) . Cantaloupe (Reid) . Bitter (Pride) . EC (short for Estonian Chick; Jess) . Kitty (Chris) . Maria (for everyone else)

Hello, current/future stalkers and people who have accidentally clicked on my profile to see what's this Bitter Sea Light creature! :3 Omg, yesh, that is a smiley! And on my profile, too! This is a special occasion indeed and you'll now have a moment to screencap this place before I continue.

Done?

Goodo. :3 So, as said earlier I'm generally known as Maria on this site. And no, I'm not paranoid about you -- yes, you behind that huge screen in that dark-dark room doing George knows what -- knowing my real name. You'd probably even find a picture of me somewhere if you wanted to. I used to be really obsessed about keeping my real life details hidden in safes and damp vaults, but at some point went 'fuck it' and started adding FFN people on FB as well. Nope, I'm not adding everyone who wants to add me and only my friends see my wall. Also, my location isn't up anywhere. Let's face it, though, even if it were I doubt anyone would travel here just to follow me around like a lovestruck puppy and do nasty things between the sheets. Or to throw a pie at my face for running the LU alongside with Jess. Mostly because it's freaking expensive and stupidity on a whole new level. However, if that pie does appear, I'll be very amused and then gloat about being so important. :D

Lasted a year in uni, studied Ecology. Loved it, but just couldn't deal with the workload after the first semester. Better luck next time, I guess. I've been in France since August 9th, spending my time with an adorable 4-year-old as an au pair. Yup, a year away from everyone. Although I'm missing my home a whole lot, this time away from everything was exactly what I needed. Things have fallen into their right places yet again. :) But yes, not a French, but an Estonian. :3

Something that you really need to know about me...I really love to hug people. 03 And I'm an eternal optimist. And a lover. And a very protective friend. And a very honest person. And a dog person. But a mixture of cat and dog personality. I can also be very bitchy and arrogant if that's how I want to come across. Sometimes very temperamental. Calm otherwise. In conclusion? A very difficult person and it's up to you whether this is something you can/want to put up with. ;)

Writing is something I really like, but since my life has been as it has been lately, I just haven't had the time for it. I've opened my MS Word pages with the pure intention to start writing several times in the past, but haven't really gotten around to writing/finishing something. Yeah, I guess you could say that I'm a lazy writer. Sorry. :P

Even though I haven't been all that active in the FFN world lately, I'm still around. Mostly in your forums, hugging you(r people). :D Still review as per request, too. If you want my second opinion on something, don't be afraid to contact me. Just know that it may not be as flowery as I seem to be. :P Example #1. Example #2. Example #3. I don't frequent FP that much, but am always up for providing a review. :)

Aaaaaand this guy. Yeah, keep your hands away from him. He's mine. ;)

http://www.springhole.net/quizzes/marysue.htm -- The ultimate Mary Sue/Gary Stu quiz.

http://andromeda.rutgers.edu/~jlynch/Writing/contents.html -- This site has proven to be useful on several times. It helps when one wants to improve their language skills.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/ -- A dictionary I love to use. Whether you need to find a synonym for a word (because constant repetition is your enemy) or just check the spelling, it helps.

http://lord-kelvin.blogspot.com/ and http://verymuchtext.blogspot.com/ -- These both are links to Lord Kelvin’s blogs, and one would benefit from reading through them.

http://twifandomrant.blogspot.com/2010/03/fanfiction-concerns.html -- Although Merevaik is a great friend of mine, this isn't up here without a reason. She once made a pretty wholesome list about what every writer should pay attention to when writing a story. It used to be on her profile, but is now moved to another place.

http://www2.gsu.edu/~accerl/punctuation/PU.html -- Punctuation rules that should help.

http://www.grammar-monster.com/-- English lessons and explanations about different things. Basically, your online teacher.

http://www.waynesthisandthat.com/writefanfic.htm -- Many hints that help you to write a better fan fiction...and hopefully more. Amusing, interesting to read, and educational.

Scale of the Universe . Sushi Cat . Number Ones . Oh, and...GO TO SLEEP! . Cats or the Internet? . Do You Have the Time?