Kina Kalamari
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since: 07-07-09, id: 677898, Profile Updated: 01-07-13
Author has written 4 stories for Fantasy, and Romance.

About Me

Age: 17

Gender: Female

Some Descriptive Words: Witty, intelligent, stubborn, silly, a bit lazy, snarky

Location: Vermont

Education: Homeschooled

Hobbies: Reading, writing, listening to music, playing the piano, obsessing about whatever it is I'm currently obsessed with, collecting quotes, analyzing human behavior

Favorite Book: Runemarks by Joanne Harris


Other Places I Occasionally Frequent

YouTube

FictionPress

NaNoWriMo

RuneScape (My display name is currently TheWordDeity)

The RuneScape Wikipedia

Blogspot

TV Tropes

DeviantART


My Very Favorite Stories
In case you don't feel like trudging through my favorites list

Shades of Gray by Odalisquia

Eulogies And Post It Notes Can Change The World! by Imaginary Parachute

Letters from a toothpick fiend by Plinky

When In Rome by SweetUnknown


And now, for the section that made my old profile so enormous…
Favorite Quotes

"Shut up," said Maddy.
Loki shut up.
"Now listen, both of you."
Both of them listened.
-Runemarks

"I feel like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain."
-Iggy, Maximum Ride

"You're mad!"
"Thank goodness for that, because if I wasn't, this would probably never work."
-Beckett and Captian Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

"Advise your brethren. You can fight, and all of you will die, or you can not fight, in which case only most of you will die."
-Beckett, Pirates of the Carribbean: At World's End

"We'll never survive."
"Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one has."
-Buttercup and Westley, The Princess Bride

"Such a strategist was the king that he had a contingecy plan for his contingency plan, and even, if circumstances required, a contingency plan for his contingency plan's contingency plan."
-Seeing Redd

"I find everyone's pain funny but my own."
-Le Frog, Flushed Away

"This is getting ridiculous. The first assassin kills the second assassin sent to kill the first assassin, who didn't assassinate anyone until we hired the second assassin to assassinate her."
-Lee Mercer, Angel

"Patience, grasshopper. Good things come to those who wait."
"I always thought it was 'Good things come to those who do the wave'. No wonder I've been so confused all my life."
-Maia and Simon, The Mortal Instruments: City of Glass

"Grimms scare the living daylights out of most wizards."
"There you are, then. They see the Grimm and die of fright. The Grimm's not an omen, it's the cause of death! And Harry's still with us because he's not stupid enough to see one and thing, right, well, I'd better kick the bucket then!"
-Ron and Hermione, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban [book]

"This is Berk. It snows nine months out of the year and hails the other three. The food that grows here is tough and tasteless. The people that grow here are even more so."
-Hiccup, How To Train Your Dragon [movie]

"This is me. I am amazing."
-Zemouregal, RuneScape

"Maybe I'm going crazy, Damon thought, intrigued. He had never gone crazy before that he could recall, and there was some appeal in the idea."
-The Vampire Diaries; The Return: Nightfall

"You know about this stuff?"
"Penny. I am physicist. I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains."
-Penny and Sheldon, The Big Bang Theory

"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually—from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint—it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly… timey-wimey… stuff."
-The Tenth Doctor, Doctor Who

"Doctor, they've got guns."
"And I haven't, which makes me the better person. They can shoot me dead, but the moral high ground is mine."
-Rose and Tenth Doctor, Doctor Who

"Do you trust this man?"
"I absolutely trust him."
"So he's not some kind of madman?"
[beat]
"I absolutely trust him."
-A soldier and River Song (about the Eleventh Doctor), Doctor Who

"Okay, need a proper look. Got to draw its fire, give it a target."
"How?"
"You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas?"
"Yes..."
"Sorry." [runs into the open] "Look at me, I'm a target!"
-Eleventh Doctor and Amy, Doctor Who

A Selection of Quotes from me, my friends, and my family:

"If I had a dime for every time I saw a monster called Gray Main the Jagged…"
"You'd probably have about a dollar."
"I'd have a lot of dimes… How many dimes are in a dollar?"
"Ten."
"Right. That's a lot of dimes."
-My friend Alex and me, while Alex was playing Diablo II

"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
"Okay. Go feed the cats."
"I'm suddenly not fine. I'm dying."
-Alex's mom and Alex

"Open foot, insert mouth."
-My mom, who had no idea what she'd said until I pointed it out

"My hand looks really pale next to yours."
"Most things pale in comparison to me."
-My sister and my dad

"Could you cook it rare or medium rare?"
"No. I'm going to cook it until it's shoe leather and fix the hole in my boot."
-My friend and her dad, about steaks

Alex: -drinking juice pouch- "Have you ever squirted someone in the face with one of these?"
Me: -gets up and moves-
Alex: "Well, that's a conversation stopper."

"I feel really random today. I got out of the shower and my first thought was, 'I'm bleeding water'."
-Alex

"In order to get away with performing in front of an audience with just maracas, you have to be very attractive and partially naked."
-My dad

Me: "I'm going to kill you."
Alex: "You know, if the person you say that to has an unfortunate accident, you could go to jail."
-Later-
Alex: "If you put styrofoam in my coffee, I will eat your soul."
Me: "You shouldn't say that. What if someone eats my soul?"
-Alex: "Like who?"

Me: "I forgot my sunglasses."
Dad: -gestures at sky- "Sun, begone!"
-sun goes behind cloud-
Me: "By golly!"
Dad: "That'll be five dollars."

"There was a spider on my arm so then I had a fit and then I died."
-Alex

"Having your online friends try to stop you from procrastinating is like asking a blind guy to teach you how to read."
-AmyQueen95, in one of our awesome PM conversations

"Honk your horn like crazy and see if someone will come beat you up so we can get an ambulance ride home."
-Alex's plan to escape clogged up traffic

"I think I'm a conversation suicide bomber."
-Alex

Grandpa: "It's older than we are. Alas, no one has offered to preserve us."
Grandma: "Just dip us in bronze and stick us on the mantle."
Me: -laughs-
Grandpa: "That was a little weird, dear."
Grandma: "You would need a really big mantle."
-Me and my grandparents, in a discussion of the restoration of a historical building

"How are your eyes? Really bad or just kind of bad?"
"Just kind of bad. If I didn't feel the need to see details, I wouldn't even have to wear glasses."
"That's what I say too… except 'details' for me are small animals and children."
-My mom's boyfriend and me

Other Quotes:

"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."
-A bumper sticker

"The newscaster is the person who says, 'Good evening,' and then tells you why it's not."
-Anonymous

"I reject your reality and substitute my own."
-Adam Savage

On a gravestone: "I told you I was sick."

"I want each and every American to know for certain that I'm responsible for the decisions I make, and each of you are as well."
-George W. Bush

"I get up every morning determined to both change the world and to have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning the day difficult."
-E. B. White

"Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid."
-Albert Einstein

"Always deny the apocalypse, because you'll usually be right, and when you're wrong, there'll be nobody there to say, 'I told you so.'"
-Charlie McDonnell

"Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."
-Anonymous


A Short Poem

There Was A Man by Dennis Lee

There was a man who never was
This tragedy occurred because
His parents, being none too smart
Were born two hundred years apart


I beta'd In Which A Shirt Comes In Handy, by Seamir. It's a really great little oneshot that would definitely give you a few laughs if you wanted to go check it out. ]


1. The Little Things In Life reviews
A genie with the ability to fulfill all your little desires sounds nice, but when said genie is completely unconventional and has the aggravating habit of vanishing unexpectedly, it might veer just a bit toward the annoying side. -Oneshot-
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,047 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 5-3-12 - Complete
2. Red Wine and Inner Truths reviews
Kate Blaze knew her friends loved a good laugh, but she never expected them to lock her in a hotel room with her best friend for twenty-four hours in some twisted matchmaking attempt. Go Fish can only go so far... -Oneshot-
Fiction: Romance - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,771 - Reviews: 36 - Published: 10-11-11 - Complete
3. The Weight Of The Worlds reviews
A threat of war, a love triangle, traitors that really aren't...Who knew life could be so complicated? Well, for Kiri, it is. Her ability to teleport between dimensions seems to keep attracting attention, and some of the attention isn't the nice kind... -REMOVED-
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 286 - Reviews: 54 - Updated: 10-12-10 - Published: 11-22-09 - Complete
4. In Search Of Adventure » reviews
When Alanya first saw Leeah, she knew she needed help. Joining together, they set out to rescue Leeah's little sister from a pack of wolves, and got a whole lot more than they'd bargained for; Watsies, Shade Wolves, and even a Witch... ON HIATUS.
Fiction: Fantasy - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,395 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 10-27-09 - Published: 8-18-09