‘Ello! My name is Owlwhisper (obviously) and I love to just sit down with a good book and read, painting pictures that capture my interest, and writing stories and poems. My two best friends so happen to be on FictionPress (Hmmm . I wonder why . . . :D) and some of my other friends too, but they keep on changing their name so I lost track a while ago.

I have written some stories, so please look into them! I have to go to thet so-awful thing called school so I won't be able to update as much as I like. (that includes replying to PMs too)

Annoying riddles

1. I turn polar bears white
and I will make you cry.
I make guys have to pee
and girls comb their hair.
I make celebrities look stupid
and normal people look like celebrities.
I turn pancakes brown
and make your champagne bubble.
If you squeeze me, I'll pop.
If you look at me, you'll pop.
Can you guess the riddle?

2. One by one we fall from heaven
down into the depths of past
And our world is ever upturned
so that yet some time we'll last

3. I drift forever with the current
down these long canals they've made
Tame, yet wild, I run elusive
Multitasking to your aid.
Before I came, the world was darker
Colder, sometimes, rougher, true
But though I might make living easy,
I'm good at killing people too.

4. Reaching stiffly for the sky,
I bare my fingers when it's cold
In warmth I wear an emerald glove
And in between I dress in gold

5. Every dawn begins with me
At dusk I'll be the first you see
And daybreak couldn't come without
What midday centers all about
Daises grow from me, I'm told
And when I come, I end all cold
But in the sun I won't be found
Yet still, each day I'll be around

6. This is a most unusual paragraph. How quickly can you find out what is so unusual about it? It looks so ordinary you'd think nothing was wrong with it- and in fact, nothing is wrong with it. It is unusual though. Why? Study it, think about it, and you may find out. Try to do it without coaching. If you work at it for a bit it will dawn on you. So jump to it and try your skill at figuring it out. Good luck - don't blow your cool!

7. It's true I bring serenity,
And hang around the stars
But yet I live in misery;
You'll find me behind bars
With thieves and villains I consort
In prison I'll be found
But I would never go to court,
Unless there's more than one

8. What question can you never honestly answer yes to?

9. I live in water
If you cut my head I'm at your door,
If you cut my tail I'm fruit,
If you cut both I'm with you

What am I?

10. This thing all things devours,
Birds, beasts, trees, and flowers.
Gnaws iron bites steel,
Grinds hard stones to meal,
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down

11. It cannot be seen, it cannot be felt,

Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt,

Lies behind stars and under hills, And empty holes it fills.

Comes first follows after, Ends life kills laughter.

Answers

1. The answer to this admittedly lame riddle is, "No." The reason is that the question at the very end asks if you can guess the riddle and there is nothing that satisfies the requirements above.

2. Sands in a hourglass

3. Electricity (or lightning)

4. A deciduous tree

5. The letter 'D'

6.The most common letter in the English language, the letter e, is not found in the entire paragraph.

7. The letter 'S'

8. Are you asleep (or dead)?

9. A pearl. They're found underwater. Removing the head (p) leaves Earl, a guy who could be at your door. Removing the tail (l) leaves pear, a fruit and if you cut both off you're left with ear, which is with you because it's attached to your head.

10. Time

11. Darkness

CAN YOU READ THIS??? Rcenet sutdy sowehd taht olny 25% of poelpe can raed tihs. All you hvae to do is tkae the frsit and lsat lteter of a wrod and the rset can be ttolaly mxeid up in the wrod. The sduty siad taht the hmaun biran dnesot raed the wolhe wrod, but olny prat of it. If you are one of the 25% taht can raed tihs, put tihs on yuor usperpgae. I can raed tihs, so I'm in the 25% - sewet!

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

-When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it

-When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand chocolate

-If at first you don't succeed, burn all the evidence that you tried

-When life gives you lemons, throw them at the mean people and hope it gets them in the eyes

-Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered, "Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?"

- I couldn't repair your brakes so I made your horn louder

- There's a light at the end of every tunnel, just pray it isn't a train.

-I never let school get in the way of my education.

- Those who say nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door

When life gives you lemons you're delusional

- Silence is golden but duct tape is silver

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity. Copy this to your profile

16 THINGS TO DO AT WALMART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice leading to the restroom.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "code 3" in housewares.

5. Go to service desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. Move a "CAUTION-WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you begin to cry and ask "why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look write into the security camera & use it as a mirror and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look'' using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say ''PICK ME! PICK ME!''

14. When an announcement comes over the speaker, assume the fetal position and scream... ''NO! NO! It's those voices again!''

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu I choose you!"

IF YOU LAUGHED AT THIS REPOST ON YOUR PROFILE .YOU KNOW YOU DID SO POST IT OR ELSE

PLEASE READ.

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't

forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for

the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that

mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister

is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices:

1) Repost this message.

2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart

One early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "When I was born I was black," "When I grew up I was black," "When I'm sick I'm black," "When I go in the sun I'm black," "When I'm cold I'm black," "When I die I'll be black." "But you sir..." "When you're born you're pink," "When you grow up you're white," "When you're sick, you're green," "When you go in the sun you turn red," "When you're cold you turn blue," "And when you die you turn purple." "And yet you have the nerve to call me colored" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Copy this onto your profile and help stop racism.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb a*s?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DA*N!" we messed up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds a*s that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this sh*t!

37 Things to do in an Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5. Meow occasionally.

6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.

7. Say "DING!" at each floor.

8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.

9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."

11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."

14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.

16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

21. Swat at flies that don't exist.

22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.

23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.

24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.

25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.

28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.

29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."

30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.

31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.

32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.

33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"

34. Tell people that you can see their aura.

35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."

36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time” When someone walks in.

Did you know . . .

Kissing is healthy.

Bananas are good for period pain.

It's good to cry.

Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94% of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

Lying is actually unhealthy.

You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89% of guys want YOU to make the first move.

It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

Chocolate will make you feel better.

Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

A good friend never judges.

A good foundation will hide all hickeys . . . not that you have any.

Boys aren't worth your tears.

We all love surprises.

Now . . . make a wish.

Wish REALLY hard!!

WISH WISH WISH WISH!!!!

Your wish has just been recieved.

Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and . . .

Your wish will be granted . . .

If only computers didn't lie . . . Oh well, it was fun to just sit there and wish "really" hard!!! :)