oO This is...oddly very good. I dunno how else to say it. It was not delusional or unreal, but in fact, very honest, and gives you a sense of hopefulness inside hopelessness. Very good.

Really well written.

that was great.

SP

Wonderful. Really really sad and moving. Keep writing :)

I...what? I got a bit confused at the end. I'm not so bright, leave me alone.

Anyway, this was good. I loved the Jaysen/Jake relationship, how they compete against one another, and Jaysen's love for Jake.

Just thought I'd add, since I'm such a picky person, that God should be capitalized. You don't have to believe in Him, but you *have* to capitalize! It's a grammatical error. My teacher would always ram that into our brains! If only she could see me now.

Great job on a very well-written story. More maybe?

-Bitter B.

...Queer. I'm sad to say I actually agree with his psychologist. *shivers* Jake seems like that ordinary kid gone wrong. Pity Jaysen, he had the perfect life and it takes one wrong turn and his life goes swirling into a mass of trouble. You said that Jaysen neglected Jake but didn't Jake do the same to him earlier? So it's sorta like payback, with a -much- higher price. Does Jaysen love Micheal because he's himself or because he's like Jake? I suppose he should sorta happy the rest of his family still keeps in contact with hime and didn't severe ties with him because of what he felt about others. Eh. Like it tons. Write more please?

well, I read it, I might as well review it ... but I'm not sure if I should be reading it as a fictional text... well, it was well written and nicely expressed. The only thing was that comment about African american minorities came awfully close to crossing the line... but other than that, yeah, nice work!

*sniff* This is a wonderful story. You managed to capture human emotions so well. Amazing descriptions and such powerful words. Wonderful. Please write more.*sniff*

~Dreamer~