Reviews for be quick jack
Kirney Slate chapter 1 . 11/7/2002
Well, that was incredable.

I almost peed my pants at your writing:

"that your ennobled quiescence glides/

after the calyx of your muted/

eye"

What, you make refrences to 3 senses, with hundreds of insanly spesific connotations to boot.

I was flabbergasted. And

"palestine of autumn..."

I speant about a half-and-hour trying to crack that one, there are so many layers to it.

Blownaway, just blown away.

Oh, I forgot:

"the stringent frost over the frocked/

alpine robe of thinned grass is & is far here-/

the blunt smack"

I'm sputtering incoherently.

Now, one little, tiny thing.

I felt like some of the imagery, formost the 'be quick jack' theme. Was not sewn in as well as the rest. it flowed well, but you needed some more to adaquitly (spelling?) explain what you were talking about, I mean, I've got some kind of an idea, however, but it could be clearer.

In this poem you used connotation like a laser beam, but you could have cut out a little more for reader.

Disgustingly good work, on my fav. stories list now.

-kirney
Catch Ya Later Alligator chapter 1 . 11/7/2002
I really like this one, too. Your poetry is so wonderful, and your diction is absolutely beautiful. "Sure eyes / watch the / high fires / trancend / above the /bank of / clouds." I love it! Wonderful!
Kievsky chapter 1 . 11/6/2002
Ah, I've been offline too long, there's so much I have to read...so anyway, the review.

To start, I have to have respect for someone who can still send me to my dictionary (virtual dictionary, hmph, I still prefer the old 1972 Webster's). And you use your vocabulary in actual context, not just for show. Not to mention the value of single words-were this a poem to be studied academically, one could write an entire essay just on meanings of "palestine of autumn."

That said, this sounds like a farewell-Victorian in style, a noble fleeing persecution and bidding farewell to her trusted servant, knowing she'll never see him again. But that's just my interpretation, and I've probably obscured the real meaning completely.