Reviews for Wanted: Scuba Diver
Former Kimmi Gray chapter 4 . 3/17/2006
Ha! Thats what thw world needs, more love between the monsters and humans... ::le sigh:: Makes me have hope for the future. I love it. Great job!
Former Kimmi Gray chapter 3 . 3/17/2006
Oh and it keeps getting better! I'm really loveing this story! It's not a normal vampire story, hehe I love it. Bravo.

Again, I have to say, give it a once over. End of that thought...

must read more now bwaha.
Former Kimmi Gray chapter 2 . 3/17/2006
Wow! This is getting good... bwaha Mr Drake sounds dreamy... pur.. bwah. Great job though, I can't wait to see what comes next.

I again wanna say, you might just wanna give it a once over, check for punctuation and word usage.

Great job.
Former Kimmi Gray chapter 1 . 3/17/2006
Oh this was very well written... I could hear the annoying chipper voice.. hate people like that.. lol but good job!

I do want to say you might want to proof read for spelling errors, punctuation, and word choices. Nothing major, just wanted to tell you to give it a quick once over, or perhaps someone else do it, usually they can catch mistakes that you normally wouldn't.

Anyway! Great start, I have to go read the next few chapters bwah! -Kimmi Gray
Tessabe chapter 4 . 1/23/2005
I think it would have been better to fill in more of the story, what about the oath, what was involved, how did he meet his wife, It seems like there is a lot missing. And perhaps a few more stories, that could be writen from this. This has been interesting and I think I'll be checking you other stuff out. If they are as good as this one, short as it is, I think I'd be adding you to my favorite authors.
Tessabe chapter 2 . 1/23/2005
Mr. Bugupbut, funny. I really like this one. I'm glad it picked it to read, and I like vampires. So I'll definately finish this one.
Val Mora chapter 1 . 7/29/2004
Interesting beginning, though you have a couple of grammar mistakes, and your prose would flow better if you combined sentences - as it is, the narrative is too jerky to be properly appreciated.
In the first sentence of your second paragraph, the comma ought to be a semicolon, by the way, and a direct quote (inside quotation marks/inverted commas) is still part of a sentence. For example, you have, "'Excellent! Do you have the necessary experience sir?' She said in her every so chipper voice", when it ought to be "'Excellent! Do you... experience, sir?' she said... very so chipper voice." The 'she' is still part of the same sentence as the direct quotation, so it shouldn't be capitalized.
Otherwise, a pretty good beginning that starts out well.
Marigold Futura chapter 4 . 11/13/2002
Good story! Although it seems to end kind of abruptly, but I guess since his finding out is the climax, the end would have to come shortly afterward.
Marigold Futura chapter 2 . 11/12/2002
Yay, it's finally up! Been getting some stupid 'story not found' message all day long...I'm still giggling at the name Mr. Bugupbutt. And hooray, more Italian shoes! Hmm...if the entire Drake corporation was so famous, wouldn't people be more suspicious/curious about it and the person at the center of it? Just a random thought. Donovan certainly treats his underlings well. _ Can't wait to see what happens next.