I'm not sure what I can say. This is an amazing poem, an amazing story. Powerful, evocative, and thoughtful. You have lots of talent for this.

Woot, I'm probably the first to read and review this poem...I like it, sort of mystical and vague, and your language is very nice. On the con side of things, the rhyme is good but awkward at times, and I think your sentences are sometimes too long and not rythmic. Be that as it may, it's wonderful. :)