A part isn't a chapter! A part is a series of chapters! On I'm doing a 5 parter. Use the name Elixir Phoenix, called The Books of Oyja I: The Tenju. Actually there is a 6th part but...nevermind. I don't really care for your characters! How is it suppose to be good if I can't relate to any of the character! You also need to edit it! If you think I'm being harsh...I edit a chapter (which is usually around 1,0 words) 5 or 6 times, I go through the entire thing. I understand that you're just beginning but...without cricism, how can you hope to win? I'm going to start an account here very soon. e-mail me, if you want to so we can continue this chat.

cute, but where's part 2?

not bad, it's very exciting, but it could use a little work. maybe more details. I can't wait for the next part