Reviews for Lose My Spark
JazzPizza chapter 1 . 5/22/2003
I like this poem...the message comes across clear and it's a good one...just a few cadence problems. Most of the lines fit together perfectly, like pieces of a jigsaw puzzles, but the few that stick out do like sore thumbs...those kind of trip a reader up.

I liked these lines:

"I wonder if you’ll love me

in the black and in the white—

And I hope you’ll see them both in me

like the starry, moonless night."

The overall tone of this kind of comes across as...optimistic, hopeful somewhat. As if there's some great faith in love embedded in the words. Hmm, could just be me. Anyway, good job.
All Mighty Terrestrial chapter 1 . 3/8/2003
FINALLY! New stuff! (broad grin) IMHO, you need to go through the wrong ones in order to be prepared when the right one comes along. There aren't that many people that are willing to deal with the dark side, I've noticed, but when you find one they're definitely a keeper. And you know I always like your stuff, whether you think it's your best or not. Keep writing!
Whiro chapter 1 . 2/25/2003
Hmm, I am glad you have written something too. I am not sure what to make of this one. But I understand the fear. I fear if people see my darker side they won't like me as much, or be scared away. Good stuff. I get it. Bravo!

~Whiro~ (been awhile since I have been heard from huh? I have new stuff up btw, and have 2 ready to go up)
Needa S chapter 1 . 2/24/2003
I like the depth in this piece it is very meaningful! Put together very well! Good job! K/Writing..
Rini chapter 1 . 2/22/2003
I like this poem for we all have our skeletons ne? The dark side we wish to hide from the ones who fell in love with a part of ourselves we sometimes think we lack, and wonder what they really are seeing.

Terra Tigra chapter 1 . 2/21/2003
We need something to help get the cobwebs out, ne? And I would say this is a pretty good start! Good rhyme scheme, by-the-way. I like how this is kind of one of those love poems but with a little more. Its not just one of those "Oh, I love you so much! I hate you ! I love you!" kind of things. Your also expressing your fears. I think it adds a nice touch.


-Terra Tigra-
ScarletDreamer chapter 1 . 2/21/2003
I absolutely love this poem!I love the words you used, i love the idea of it!it rocks!keep up the amazing work!I'm adding it to my faves :)

Paradise of Envy chapter 1 . 2/20/2003
I like this poem. You see, I kind of hope when I have that "bad mood/dark side" that everyone won't just actually leave me be.

I kinda' get a nagging that maybe my friends won't be there to cheer me out of it. Like today, I almost bitch-slapped a girl in my class. She really deserved it, but my friend clamed me down.

Once again, I like the poem!