|Reviews for In the Eye of the Tiger|
| salvatore ferragamo chapter 31 . 1/2/2010
Loved the story! Seriously captured the characters well.
Ideas for your next story:
- A sequel of sorts, Sean has a big case/hes thinking of proposing, and is so preocupied over this that Leah thinks hes cheating. Would really like to see these two more!
- if not.. I really like the spy stories and there are hardly any good ones out there, maybe make it with a female spy with a male to guard?
Suggestions - hope they help because I would really like to see another story from you!
| jyottoor chapter 31 . 12/27/2009
i loved the story it was relly relly good i was wondering if u r makin a Sequel to it if not can u please think about it please :D
| Lily Brennan chapter 31 . 12/23/2009
Amazing. This story was awesome! I added it to my favorites so long ago, like 2004, and I just went to go through them and saw that it had been updated. I re-read it and read the new chapters and everything was PERFECT! The characters were all handled so well, and everything was written to perfection, even with the occasional POV switching, which I'm not normally a fan of, but you did it so brilliantly, I loved it. It actually added to the story, with the way you used it, instead of detracting from it. The only thing that I couldn't help but giggle out loud about was the name of her hometown... Sardinia... Sardines... it just struck me as a funny thing, no offense! :)
I'm glad that you didn't use Sean's POV regularly through the story, only really when needed to mix things up or help the plot move along. It kept some of the mystery alive! But then, at the same time, when you did write in his POV, it was so insightful... It made his character development believable, as he changed from the 'brick wall' persona into the 'more of an electric fence' one. (if that makes any sense...haha)
Also, keeping it in third-person was excellent, because, again, keeping that mystery alive! ...I only say so much about Sean, because, okay, I admit it, I'm in love with him! ;) And I think that says a lot about your skill in writing him as a character. It's difficult to write someone with such an extreme personality, especially when it's a romance situation, where you know there will have to be changes later on... I mean, how difficult is change? Very! Especially when you have to change him in the mind of others, your readers. Not the easiest thing in the world. I've read so many stories where it's literally "I'm a brick wall, I will never love" to "your eyes sparkle, dear-heart, make love to me!" in a matter of one or two chapters (usually short ones too! lol). You, however did the exact opposite of this, and it turned out wonderfully.
Also, on Leah's character, I should say you did a great job. It's difficult to write a captivating female first-person. Especially a sheltered, embittered one. It can easily become too whiney and inaccessible to readers. But you really avoided that when you went through the story. That was one thing, though, that I would have liked to see more of, was the connection between her emotional loss of her family to the physical loss Sean suffered (won't say what in case someone hasn't read that far yet!). It's in Sean's mind in the last couple chapters, but in the rest of the story, I think it would have added that much more of a connection between them, in that way.
Also, the whole 'sweetheart' nickname thing- so great! :)
Woah, I'll stop there... this is kind of a doozey of a review! Sorry about the length!
Anyway, again, amazing story, loved it, can't wait to read it over and over again! :)
| Mori Verne chapter 16 . 12/19/2009
do i like it?
not at all
I LOVE IT!
| omnomnomnom chapter 31 . 12/18/2009
...i'm sorta lost for words, but i...that...just that was such a brilliant ending! i was clutching my pillow and i was just so happy for Sean and Leah, even though their fictional characters you've made them come alive! amazing story!
| omnomnomnom chapter 24 . 12/18/2009
This is so good! he's starting to "feel" and to have some proper emotions now. the jealousy thing with James was really cute. i really do like the character of Sean, the parent thing really explained why he's sorta messed up.
| omnomnomnom chapter 8 . 12/18/2009
ouch...heartless much. but i bet by the end he's gonna be like wrapped around her pinkie. or not. But hey i'm loving it.
| omnomnomnom chapter 6 . 12/18/2009
i can sense another late night tonight. i don't think i'll be able to stop clicking . i love this story so far. i quite like Sean, he's dark and mysterious. sparks are gonna fly!
| omnomnomnom chapter 1 . 12/18/2009
i got three letters for you W.O.W.
i'm getting really excited. i can tell this is gonna be so action-packed! i'm glad i clicked on this story because the usual romance stories are getting a bit cliche...but i do like cliches! anyway looking forward to the rest of your story! great start though!
| Qu33n of Spades chapter 3 . 12/13/2009
I'm still enjoying this so far. Your prose is a little sparse - I almost want a little more fleshing out in description and such-like, but I don't need it.
It does seem as if one suitcase is a little much to be taking, especially if they're in such a hurry. I would think a backpack with the bare minimum would be the max that he would let her take. They want to travel quickly and as lightly as possible. Anyhow...
I will probably do some more either tonight or tomorrow. I look forward to reading the next chapter. :-)
| Qu33n of Spades chapter 2 . 12/13/2009
Hi, me again.
Okay, the first thing I'm having a problem with is this: You're using actions as tags. For example...
Jack got straight to the point, "blah blah blah"
Sean nodded, "blah blah blah"
Jack breathed an internal sigh of relief, "blah blah blah."
You should have PERIODS where those commas are. Only do the commas if you have a dialogue tag, meaning "said" or "asked" or some variant thereof. (Don't worry, I'm in a 400 level fiction workshop class in college, and there are people in there who are STILL doing this.)
Once again, instead of typing LEAH in all caps, give us a page break. That'll make it easier on the eyes.
I like the mention of the fact that normal, every day things like hunger seem strange in the middle of this crisis. Makes it easier to relate to the character.
Obviously I can't just sit here and move on after that cliffhanger, so it's off to chapter three!
| Qu33n of Spades chapter 1 . 12/12/2009
Hey, I just got started reading this. So far I'm pretty intrigued!
I review pretty thoroughly, but since I'm just getting going on reading this, I'll keep it short... also this chapter's been up for a good six years, so any issues that I may bring up I'm willing to bet you've already noticed. Time is one of the best editing aids ever.
There's some formatting things, first of all, that almost turned me off to this chapter, but they're pretty simple fixes.
1. Having the summary right in the beginning of the chapter is fine, but you don't have any separation between "how much can she trust him?" and "Chapter 1: EscapeLEAH" Obviously you know that you should probably put a page-breaker in there (you can do that in the editing box used for editing exported chatpers), and then for the title of the chapter, I would almost say put a dash between "Escape" and "LEAH".
Also, instead of putting LEAH between the exposition and the mother's dialogue, I would just put another page-breaker. We already know that this chapter is from Leah's POV, so remind us again just feels weird.
Story-wise, the only thing I'm having trouble with so far is the complete lack of affection between the parents and Leah. Since you seem pretty masterful with your prose, I'm willing to bet that you've thought this out already, but I'm going to go at it like I think you haven't, because assuming doesn't get anyone anywhere. Needless to say, the familial relationship is a little unlikely - although anything more commonplace would totally take away from the story, I think - but in order to believe that her parents are such complete sociopaths (and they are, in fact, sociopaths) I need to know WHY, and that would come from some talk about Leah's grandparents. How did her parents grow up? I can definitely see her father growing up in poverty, and some kind of abuse, which would definitely screw him up to be detached enough from his children to make it possible, even believable, that he would only view them as stepping stones for his own advancement. Leah's mother doesn't need to have grown up so horribly, she could just, I dunno, be one of those people who never recovered from post-partem depression and has been drugged up ever since she popped out her first kid, I dunno.
As for the concern with advancement, I feel like Leah's father would have SOME concern for who's going to carry on the family name, you know, which makes it seem a little odd that the only boy in the family got off so easily, but it doesn't bug me enough that I'm really going to make a big deal about it.
Keep in my mind that my suggestions are musings are totally that - mine - and that this is YOUR story. I'm not telling you to change anything, and it's entirely possible that you've already taken care of these things in subsequent chapters. I'll read one or two more today and get back to you, how's that?
| E. M. Isle chapter 31 . 12/12/2009
hello, so i just read the last two chapters. they were great, i just think i'm going to reread the whole story again, because i forgot half of the plot since reading it the first time, but i'm happy happy happy that you finished it. i remember loving this story so it's really great that you completed it. thanks :) hm, what else to talk about, i'll read "in the eye of the tiger" again and then i'll tell you all my thoughts about the story in another review. in the last chapter you said that you think about writing a different story but you can't really think of a new storyline, so i thought that i could tell you some of my ideas :) if you're interested. it's just that i got way to many ideas, but i'm not good at writing, even though i wish i were as good as you. and i have a tendency to start a story and never finish it. so if you want to talk about new ideas, just write me a mail to
looking forward to hearing from you :)
| XxSiennaxX chapter 31 . 12/10/2009
I'm really glad they ended up together and happy - I love happy endings :)
When/if you post another story could you add an authors note/chapter at the end of this story to let those of us that are subscribed to story alerts know that you've released another story, thanks.
| jessie0754 chapter 31 . 12/9/2009
I'm feeling sympathetic for James, but I'm happy with the ending (was rooting for Sean the whole story). Thanks for the story.