More! Please!

This will be my shortest review ever:

I didn't breathe through most of that.

-'- Rallen -'-

This is great! I can't wait for the next part, and I love your stories!

One of the things that enables me to enjoy a story is the level of originality and tone. I can always conclude what stories actually affect me by how much of the plot, characters, and writing tools I am able to remember and enjoy even after reading the work. I love this story because it could so easily be sappy considering Jaisyn's thought process, amusing as it is, but once be lays on a bit of the cheese, he affectively backs off. The character's themselves would normally confuse me on terms of individuality, but you immediately display personality in each "new" character that appears. Even the bouncers have defined characteristics that I enjoy.

Usually I can also tell what I want to happen in a story, but with this one I truly don't know. I think Jaisyn and Nate would most definitely be gorgeous together. However, there is no clear obstacle, and I am a sucker for inner conflict. Thusly, I enjoy Jaisyn's battle with his inklings of "hope" and dare I say pessimistic tendencies? Over-all I love and support. I will be reading.

-'- Rallen -'-

YEA! This is really good! I like the way you portray the friendship between the twins and Jaisyn! I can't wait for Nathen and Jaisyn to get together!

. drunk friendfriend who talks too much. If it isn't their own secrets they spill, it's yours. My profoundest sympathies to Jaisyn.

Excellent chapter again- though the sexual tension here was fairly well-portrayed, it did not come across as intensely as I expected. :)

*cries* oh gods you didn't! you stopped it there how could you toy with my emotions like that! please write more soon! *begs* i'll give you cookies! homemade cookies! i love you're writing it's great i love the way you describe things! and the way you put in the dialouge is great because in some fics (like mine mostly) the talking just some how seems forced but you just flow into it so beautifully!

(\_/).#(_(")(") bunny for you!

and pleas update soon this is me after i finished this chapter - *eyes water up* what that's all so far? *reloads* come on damnit say it was updated! *cries* no!

yeah i really like it if you cant tell so thank you so much for sharing your wonderful writing you're so talented, i can't wait for more and i hope you keep on writing!

Dun, Dun, Dun! Poor Jaisyn! I can't wait to find out if he and Nathen get together! I can't wait for the next chapter!

You gotta continue with this one. I like it a lot. I love all of you characters. Nathan is great! Keep writing and I'll keep reading.

Awsome new chapter! THe plot is wonderful. Nathen is really neat. I can't wait for the next chapter! Please update fast!

Hey, great. If there's one thing I really loved about this story, it's the way you've managed to bend the English language, and seeing how your writing is- technically flawless. I keep getting bowled over by the grammar, and the spelling, and the punctuation. ;

I'd like to say, also, that I liked this chapter very much better than the last good, eh? I think the little twist about how the band members weren't getting along was just right, and Jaisyn is a great character and very real, especially the part where he just burst into hysterical laughter. I should know- I've been in situations like that. p

I like this story a lot! Sounds like the plot can go just about anywhere. It really has a great start.

You've got very remarkable writing here. Excellent use of language, humour slyly and judiciously mixed in with the narration style, lightening it, and you've given Jaisyn a solid, absolutely thumping solid character development here. I'm very glad you're writing more.

OMG all that and all we know is this new guys eye color AH That ain't right, please update soon pretty pretty pretty please!

One helluva good story! Send me mail and tell me when the next chappies out? like I said one helluva good story!