|Reviews for Tainted Angel|
| Jess chapter 5 . 1/15/2004
Great chp! Hope you will update soon! But I know it is not easy to do. heheh... (o_o)
| disha chapter 5 . 1/15/2004
awesome! don't worry about the punctuation, you have the ability to capture your reader's attention and maintain it-which is more important.
| Kass chapter 5 . 1/15/2004
Wow, you updated! I'm so happy!
| disha chapter 4 . 1/15/2004
Great story! Very well written and interesting. Please e-mail me when you update at
| shyreader chapter 4 . 1/13/2004
HELLO if that was your idea of bad bring on the 5th chapter.
I can't understand why you have not updated but hey everyone is busy so your forgiven.
| dotcom chapter 4 . 12/26/2003
OMG! I am like...so hooked up with this fic. You have to update soon! It's a matter of life and death.
| lilia chapter 4 . 12/23/2003
OMG!This fic's update soon.
| MimiGhost chapter 4 . 12/22/2003
i really realy luv this fic
| DrowningInTearsOfCrimson chapter 4 . 12/19/2003
Just a warning, I give constructive criticism, not just compliments...
Well, let's start with something nice. I like the characters. Laurel and Seth seemed a bit awkward, but it's only the 4th chapter, so *shrug* I hope they develop a little bit more in the future because they sound quite interesting.
Now, for criticism... I think you should check over your word choices here and there. You have some great figurative language and some adjectives and nouns worked very well in their respective places, but there are times when sentences don't make sense. Also, there are some punctuation mistakes and such that made some sentences a little hard to read, like,
"Laurel was so preoccupied, she didn't notice a small child walk up to her and tug on her black jeans. Laurel looked down in surprise, a little boy stood there, his hair was caked with dust, his body was tanned, but he was obviously malnourished."
Your quotation marks were a little bit off, like,
""Well the king isn't always right," Laurel said getting annoyed, "are all these people here because of their partners and children?""
There's a period after annoyed and the 'are' should be capitalized since it's a new sentence.
I apologize if it seems like I'm dissing the story, but I'm just trying to be helpful. There -were- lots of things that I did like. The descriptions of the Gods and Goddesses were interesting and I adore the overall story line. I can't wait to see the finished product
Um... Well, I thought I had something else, but I guess that's it. Keep up the good work. Until next time,
| le petite corsair chapter 4 . 12/10/2003
I just checked and saw that you had updated- I hope you update again soon! This is turning into a very good and interestng story.
| Blind Silence chapter 3 . 12/4/2003
I have already reviewed on the other chapters and I just wanted to get your attention and ask you to please write some more.
| Fyrefly chapter 4 . 12/3/2003
c'mon! where's an update? please hurry!
| fehrocious chapter 4 . 11/15/2003
Oh I love it so much! God, it's gotten pretty interesting now. Though, the word 'booby trapped' didn't really fit with the whole tone of the chapter. But that's just me, eh?
Anyways, here's my email :
I wanna be on the mailing list!
| Alcapacien chapter 4 . 11/13/2003
Actually, I loved it! I really really can't wait for more!
| wow chapter 3 . 11/8/2003
That was interesting. Write more soon.