Reviews for Below the water
trojjer chapter 1 . 9/21/2003
Oh they're right, this is too incredible to laugh at! And just look at my first poem, lol...
CM12345 chapter 1 . 9/5/2003
Oh wow, I LOVE this poem! The formatting is beautiful, it adds to the symbolism of the peice beautifully! It's a wonderful peice, it reads like it was written from the heart. Good work.
DeViLDaughTeR chapter 1 . 8/20/2003
THAT ROCKED! me enjoyed it! very well done!
Michael Craig .inactive chapter 1 . 8/3/2003
No laughing here. For your first, it shows how much skill you had to work with in the beginning, and I'm glad you're working to expand your thoughts and boundaries.
Fae the Faery chapter 1 . 7/30/2003
A true tale of a loss of all hope. Such a wonderfully defined piece that I will enjoying critiquing. You have a defined flow of rhythm in this story and the rhyme scheme was well-developed. I was intrigued by the phrase "I could sleep again, breathe again...You held my head below the water". It intrigues me simply because it is common for depressies (such as the narrator) to have trouble breathing normally when they are overwhelmed with this sort of emotion. I go through it daily myself. Ahem, back to you. The last stanza is my absolute favorite. "After the storm, is there always calm?" A true pessimistic thought, though so it is also very true. There is never calm after a storm...but at the end of one, just as there is never a collapse to the ground unless a fall after the trip. It was a marvelous piece (you are a very enthusiastic, flattering reviewer as well...) and I expect further, more indepth works from you.

Not without respect,

Miss Fae
AutumnRhapsody chapter 1 . 7/28/2003
I like the way you set the poem up, w/the third line after an ellipsis, and the first three rhyme. It's cool.
Inoperative chapter 1 . 7/18/2003
why would we laugh? it rocked...
LuvTro3Ladies chapter 1 . 7/12/2003
Gothy: First poem? You sure about that? My poems aren't half as good as yours are!
AvaRicE chapter 1 . 4/1/2003
F* amazing, yo! You never said you was so brilliant at writing. _!

I mean, friggin CUSTARD!

I really, really bloody love this!

You had BETTER keep on writing, mah hoe!

Jezza ;)
BecomingMyself chapter 1 . 4/1/2003
Nothing to laugh about, not about the topic, not about your poem...

It's a nicely written and in a way sad poem...

You are doing great according to me...

Please, write on!