Reviews for do what is right
HenryDavid chapter 1 . 4/15/2013
Ok; I really don't want to annoy people on this site. Especially women.
But this; the only word that describes this: Is god ** *** lazy.
I do NOT understand; how you are unable to use punctuation, proper usage of grammar and spelling.
Gets not Get's. Knock not Nock. Responsibility not... whatever the hell that is.

I seriously hope that you were trying to make it look like this; otherwise you have SEVERE brain problems and should see a doctor.

I am A fan of Teen Pregnancy stories; so it IS a shock when I say this:
Take it down; As soon as you can. Just... Wow. It is a pile of crap. Whatever story there is has been completely obscured by the sheer laziness of production.
(If you would like advice on spelling and composing, read my comment for excellent grammar.)

Forever Alone

-Henry David
Q chapter 1 . 1/23/2013
Man , he was gonna be the first nigga to go to college, and u had to come along and stop him! thats bull shit
Black-Rose7 chapter 9 . 6/8/2003
Wow. It just gets worse and worse.
Black-Rose7 chapter 1 . 6/7/2003
Oh, and you incorrectly spelt 'write' on your profile... After reading more of your work I discovered that the lack of punctuation is a running theme... When you get reviews from people using dialect such as 'dis' on a literary website, it's time to worry.
Black-Rose7 chapter 2 . 6/7/2003
OK, the plot in itself is good, but it's let down by lack of setsnce and vocabulary variation as well as lack of punctuation. It kind of reads like this:

hey wake up I don't wana we have to get up and go to church oh great fundraiser yeah...

It's like having one, long, continuous inward conversation - not good.
LivingWitThrill chapter 1 . 6/7/2003
intersting plot...but its just dialouge you could add things in