|Reviews for Together as One Apart|
| Frenzied-Thespian chapter 1 . 8/1/2004
You're right that is hard to explain. Its good. Very good.
| saiya-jinmira chapter 1 . 5/3/2004
beautiful...I like it becaues I could feel the winds
| Sarah Parker chapter 1 . 10/27/2003
Oh this is such a gorgeous poem. Absolutely beautiful imagery and your word choice is amazing... wonderful, wonderful job. So very heartwrenching.
| glitterjewele chapter 1 . 7/16/2003
wow! this is astoundingly vivid and powerful, you create the scenes and the emotions expertly. the pain and helplessness of the lovers really jumps out at you. i loved how you classified the natural elements as belonging to specific emotions (i.e.-the seas of longing) and kept the same mold going through the entire poem ~ it served as a very effective connecting device. got a wonderful sense of a plummeting movement when you switched from the girl on the top of the cliff to the guy stranded on a rock in the middle of the ocean below. also, i loved how they never spoke except for that one cry (which didn't make any noise at all the way you wrote it - very cool) ~ the denial of their simple motions accomplished *such* an amazing effect. my most favoritest lines in the piece overall were "hair of streaming golden love," "she turns her crystalline eyes of patience," "surrounded by a sea of ridicule," and "they give in to the reeking power of fate/and tumble into the black sea of tragedy." the end was absolutely gorgeous ~ on par with romeo and juliet 'beautiful tragedy'ness, i'd say. fantastic work. i shall most definitely be back to read more of your stuff as soon as i find another free moment. kudos!
| Dirty Wallpaper chapter 1 . 7/16/2003
this poem was so strong, it literally engulfed my entire attention, and captured my mind, it was absolutely amazing. the descriptions were tragicly clear and so i got a very very vivid picture of what exactly was heppening, and it was so sad...and here i was thinking i was the only one who wrote poems as depressing as these...ther was something very trademarkie about the poem, like you had really put something into which just made it all yours. i absolutely cannot choose my favourite line/section in this, its all to riviting and essential that i wouldnt dare single out even one little bit.
you obviously have massive amounts of talent, kudos for the magnifico poem.
| Pa-Ja-Mas1 chapter 1 . 6/29/2003
WOW that was great it made me think it actually gave me chills it was a very well written poem it hard to describe it without sounding like a sissy lol keep it up
| Winged One1 chapter 1 . 6/27/2003
This poem has such wonderful imagery! You tell such good stories through poems. Never stop writing, I'd have to kill you. ;)
| Angele Raye chapter 1 . 6/25/2003
This is amazing. It feels like it was written for me, and only me. Your phrasing is simply beautiful. I truly love it.
| Softly Jae chapter 1 . 6/24/2003
As the tempest of deceit climaxes
Awesome line. Great poem. Very true to my life. Good visuals.
| J. T. Phlaan chapter 1 . 6/21/2003
Depressing, emotional, and visuals up the ying-yang. Perfect, but reminds me of a friend of mine...and I hope her life doesn't erode away in pain.
Touching, and powerful
| Jenis chapter 1 . 6/19/2003
agree with "victim of life", it's too good for my words.
| Baby Milo chapter 1 . 6/18/2003
That's really good!
| Zainab chapter 1 . 6/17/2003
Wow, well written. Very mysterious. Love the descriptions you put in, especially about the girl. Good imagery.
| TL Demeter chapter 1 . 6/17/2003
it's too good for my words...
| recalcitrant chapter 1 . 6/16/2003
hey seriously thank you, that is the only worth while piece of work that i have read on this fuckin site. i would say 99 percent of the stuff i read it horrible but that was very good.