Reviews for Tales of Etharion
Orion Alai chapter 1 . 6/20/2003
Okay, really quick. Paragraphs. You really really really have to break that up into paragraphs. It doesn't matter how short a story is, if it's ten sentences or more, break it up.

It's very tiresome, and not to mention hard, to read a story that's all stuffed up into one big long chunk (unless of course you've got pictures or something in it somewhere to break up the monotony). Sorry, if I sound harsh to your very first story, but I really really really have this thing about comfort reading, and the block style is really really really not comfortable.

Just remember: Paragraphs every five or so sentences, and when you're changing speakers. Don't cut corners. It's all for the readers.

Other than that, the title sounds very interesting, so I'll probably bookmark this and check it out again. Again, apologize if I sound harsh, but in the end this will only benefit.
Kezarahk chapter 1 . 6/20/2003
First off, it's hard to read this because it's all crammed together. Try breaking it up into several more paragraphs, especially when people are talking.

That said, this reminds me a little bit of the fairy tales by Frank Stockton (I think that's his name) who wrote "The Lady, or the Tiger?" - it's a really famous story. )