|Reviews for George Bush Is An Evil Alien SheepClone|
| Tiger SilverWing chapter 1 . 7/2/2004
HAHA! I knew it! That's great, keep up the good work _~
| Lain-the-kitty chapter 1 . 6/13/2004
OMG! HOW FUNNY! *gigles*
| CountessErzsebet04 chapter 1 . 12/18/2003
That story was hysterical! I couldn't stop laughing! Great job! Write more about George Bush PLEASE! I have something that may give you some ideas. Here in it's, um, triumphant glory? is GEORGE W. BUSH'S RESUME!
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE
LAW ENFORCEMENT: I was arrested in Kennebunkport,
Maine in 1976 for
driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled
guilty, paid a fine, and had
my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas
driving record has
been "lost" and is not available.
MILITARY: I joined the Texas Air National Guard and
went AWOL. I refused
to take a drug test or answer any questions about my
drug use. By joining
the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam.
COLLEGE: I graduated from Yale University. I was a
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I began my career in the oil business in Midland,
Texas in 1975. I bought
oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The
company went bankrupt
shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took
land using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing
friends in the oil industry
(including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected
Governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making
Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as
the most smog-ridden
city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the
tune of billions in
I set the record for the most executions by any
Governor in American
With the help of my brother, the Governor of
Florida, and my father's
appointments to the Supreme Court, I became
President after losing by
over 500,0 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing
cost of over one
billion dollars per week.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted
the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual
deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private
bankruptcies filed in any
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in
the history of the U.S.
I am the first president in U.S. history to enter
office with a criminal
I set the the all-time record for most days on
vacation in any one year
After taking-off the entire month of August, I
presided over the worst
security failure in U. .
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical
Bunker Buster," a WMD.
In my State Of The Union Address, I lied about our
reasons for attacking
Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I set the record for most campaign fund-raising
trips by a U.S. president.
In my first year in office over 2-million Americans
lost their jobs and
that trend continues every month.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a
I appointed more convicted criminals to
administration than any president
in U.S. history.
I set the record for least amount of press
conferences than any president
since the advent of television.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.
history and refused to
intervene when corruption involving the oil industry
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and
support a cut in duty
benefits for active duty troops and their families
- in war time.
I have set the all-time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously
protest me in public venues (15 million people)
shattering the record for
protest against any person in the history of
I've broken more international treaties than any
president in U.S.
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the
richest of any
administration in U.S. history. My "poorest
millionaire," Condoleeza Rice,
has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
I am the first president in U.S. history to order an
pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a
sovereign nation. I did
so against the will of the United Nations, the
majority of U.S. citizens,
the world community.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the
largest bureaucracy in
the history of the United States government .
I am the first president in U.S. history to have the
United Nations remove
the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S.
prisoners of war" detainees)
and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva
I am the first president in history to refuse United
inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for
receiving the most
corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of
my best friends,
Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate
bankruptcy fraud in
U.S. history. My political party used the Enron
private jets and corporate
attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme
Court during my
election decision. I have
protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or
prosecution. More time and money was spent
investigating the Monica
Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating
one of the biggest
corporate ripoffs in history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the
World Trade Center
attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the
most hated country in
the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world
I am first president in history to have a majority
of Europeans (71%) view
my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted
criminals to be awarded
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring
Osama Bin Laden
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as Governor of Texas are
now in my father's
library, sealed, and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
attended regarding public energy policy are sealed
in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.
Please consider my experience when voting in 2004 -
Send this to every voter you know.
| outruntheavalanche chapter 1 . 10/16/2003
George Bush's secret life as an exotic dancer? NO! *cries*
| Mercury Silverscale chapter 1 . 7/20/2003
wow. people actually think i'm funny. thank you! and to the one who thins i should be shot... well, i'd like to see you come on down here and try it! but wait! you don't know where i live, so you can't! hahahaha! once again, mercury silverscale triumphs!
| i'm dam proud to be american chapter 1 . 7/19/2003
Your so meen!1 give our presedint a break!1! hes just trying to get rid of those dam aribs!11
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED!
YOU SHOUD BE SHOT!
GO TO HEL!
| iccess-america chapter 1 . 7/2/2003
I have been tempted to read this for days and I say this: you are genius. You know what's funny...I saw in the inquirer that yes, saddam and osama are IN LOVE. I just about laughed my ass off and I'm doing it right now! *recovers* this was genius and I think I'll read some of your other stuff!
| JainaTina chapter 1 . 7/1/2003
funny altho i like our president..yeah..maybe u do someone else like that too?
*falls out of chair laughing and hits JainaTina for the second time today and she now looks like she wants to strangle me(which can't be good)* THIS WAS ONE OF THE MOST HILARIPUS THINGS I HAVE EVER READ! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! IT WAS SOSOSOSOSO FUNNY!
This is JainaTina and TenshiNoSaturn reviewing.(P.S. Yes, lotsa times we sign reviews together. Got a problem? Get a life.)