Reviews for The Pirates Daughter |
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![]() ![]() ![]() that it? Come on just a little more? |
![]() ![]() ![]() Uh. Darling. Nice story and all, but you used alot of common slang words that are from today's world. Use more words that would be actually said back then. Also, Jake and Kayna's feelings for each other were a bit abrupt don't you think? |
![]() ![]() ![]() nice :D |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh~ I like it, I like it I myself am a regency writer and enjoy reading these historical romances. Please update! Your plot is lovely~ |
![]() ![]() ![]() are you familiar with how dialogue is supposed to be written? and what's with that "yeah" in there? I don't think that slang like "yeah" existed in the time of pirates, hon. Oh, and do you know how drews are assembled? Not that way. They don't hire everyone and they all go to the captain's house. It's more of and every able-bodied man seeking adventure, kind of ad. Pirates were very rarely old drunk and fat. If they were old drunk and fat it would be very difficult for any crews to get their ships going. |
![]() ![]() Revise, revise, revise your English! Your possessive, eg. your hand You're you are |
![]() ![]() This story could be amazing...but it's not quite there yet. You rush a lot with scenes and it feels like u just throw words together to make a sentence and not even care whether it sounds dumb or not. You need to put more thought and detail into this story. Realism would be good too. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Woah! This is so strange... I have a story called GLIMMERS IN THE MIST, which is a pirate fic as well. The strange thing is that I have a main character called Kayna who is also the daughter of a pirate captain. Is this a coincidence? Strange. |
![]() ![]() ![]() yes very good, sorry i cant read the rest that you have up today but i will definately read it sooner or later...you are a talented writer...perhaps you could use a bit more description in the boat adn teh surroundings to give it life(where are they? are they out to sea or docked at a highly populated town? just little stuff like that so the erader doesnt have to guess well they could be here or here...) other then that, yes this is very good |
![]() ![]() ![]() Nicoley, this chapter is really good. Nice way to put imagery or w/e into it, cause it really paints a picture. Don't tell Geena I'm reviewing your story, cause she is upset that you have more reviews...oh well. much luv, Bri |
![]() ![]() ![]() Not Bad. this review is probably a little late, but hey. It's a reveiw right? Ack! you make my head spin! the events aren't connected enough. Like Kayna and Jake's love, it just kinda popped up outta no where. Go into more detail. Other than that I like the story. :-) cool idea, keep it up. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Great chapter nicole. Keep up the good work! Not much to say since its perfect.! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Nicoley, this is awesome! Please please please don't make me wait as long as you made me wait for this chapter! I wanna keep reading! Just, make up something else! Cause this is such an awesome story! much luv, Bri |
![]() ![]() ![]() Good story. Please update soon! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Nicole that was terrific! You stop fretting about your stories being bad, I read them and they are so good. They aren't boring at all! You have talent keep up writing and I will be happy! |