Excellent poem, truly admirable how you can tell a story with poetry! Each chapter can stand alone by itself and be understood, but when all are read together they fit together like a very beautiful puzzle. Your vocabulary is superb! It keeps the rhythm of the poem flowing perfectly. Your rhymes are original and refreshing, thanks for posting this! :)

This is really chilling, but completely awesome at the same time! Your epic is amazing, and although there are one or two lines that I would rephrase, for the most part, the flow and drama of this piece are as sublime as they are terrifying.

Nice. I can't wait ot read the end!

Erisah

I see this has been around forever, but I'm still going to review it because it's better late than never. And it's too good NOT to review! ;)

Wow, really, I'm nearly speechless. First of all, the flow was amazing, and it seemed to flow so perfectly that I tried to pay closer attention, finally realizing you wrote this in iambic tetrameter...yes o_O? *tried to sound really smart there...ahem* Word choice is awesome, and the description is impeccable. The imagery it created was a beautiful, vivid, sinister little movie slide show type of thing. :) The rhyming was a little rocky in certain parts of certain chapters, but as a whole, amazing! I don't think I'd be able to rhyme that much.

I loved the entire epic poem, but my most favorite parts were I, I, XII, XI, and XVI. Amwesome! I think you deserve a virtual award. :)

In all honesty I never really read this whole thing, and all the way through, till today. This is truly amazing! Somehow I foresaw what was gonna happen in 18 and 19 but to actually read it was altogether different. If you sold this, you could make billions. I demand a part two!

Great piece!

awesome poems. it rhymes too! very vivid and very sad. love it so much i cannot stand!

This is really really good. It was so vivid, and I like how you managed to ryhme without going off topic. GREAT job.

Wow. I like it.

I'm loving this. _

Just so you know, there's an error on chapter five: you wrote "begins" as "beings." Not sure if anyone else has pointed that out. It's the first error of any kind I've seen yet, though. Great job - and keep writing.

Delightful metre and rhyme—smoothly crafted with rich images and visions enthralling. Well done—a pleasure to read. m

Hey, I see you are still working wonders with this story telling poetry. And it is fantastic, just as it was when i left...like 12 years ago. I haven't been here in ages. I love the last four lines the best, esp. the part about the sails catching the draft of the sighing souls.
You rock!
Cheers

:S
Maybe cos it's 6am or maybe cos it's a chapter about her transforming, but this just widened my eyes!
'long fingers stretch like spider legs'
'starvations aura round her wails'; just everything, she becomes this pained creature- it's such a horrifying picture!
'immortal death'- nice!
Cool ending- the heat glowing at her.
(ps- :S You mention in your grovel how much worse a reviewer you are, yet I've missed this for months! I've missed lots of stuff for months... but it was so cool to read this whole thing again!:)

Your poetry is so-*good*. I wish you would put up more individual poems, I can never remember where I am in these anthologies! haha. Anyway. I just wanted to say thanks for all yor reviews-you always say the sweetest things, and it always really makes me smile to see what you have to say. Keep writing!
~lyv

I have a general rule regarding poetry. I don't read poetry. This caught my attention, though. The subject matter seems a bit morbid, but cool, and you're great with details. I don't know if you're familiar with the lady death comics, but that was generally what I had pictured reading this.

Epic poem is right. I want to check the rest of this out, but sadly, I pulled a long night and a longer morning. I'll have to come back after I've got some sleep.

love it