All Mighty Terrestrial chapter 1 . 3/29/2004
Wanna meet a girl that isn't stupid or drunk? Very simple. Stop going to bars and parties to meet girls. (The stupid and drunk kind of go hand in hand, at least from what I've seen).
Let's see, technical stuff... flowed really well, empathize with your revulsion of drunk people (because nobody acts like themselves when they're drunk), nothing else to say, so I will hit submit.
Sleepykitten chapter 1 . 1/3/2004
I don't know what it is exactly about this song that I like so much. After reading about 5 of your other works, I think I like this one the best. It's raw and honest. I don't want to say the same things as other people have said about your song, but I liked
"Alcohol induced sense of humour
but to me your just a bore
Socially produced sex appeal
but to me your just a whore"
Looking forward to reading more.
likeFIREFLIES chapter 1 . 10/19/2003
wow. i reaally love it. my favourite parts: "chemically produced reaction, and she's just another chick" and also "sexually produced sex appeal, but to me you're just a whore"

it sounds very blink 182. sorry if this offends you in some way. sounds very similar to "The Party Song" by Blink 182. it's a great song. great job!
i was a postcard chapter 1 . 9/22/2003
You have a way of writing certain lines that just stick and are just great! Like "Socially produced sex appeal" and

"Perfume induced attraction

yet it makes me sick

Chemically produced reaction"

I tell you, as a girl myself, I don't understand girls. I prefer guys...well, that makes sense. lol. Anyways I'll stop babbling.
avidelecteur chapter 1 . 8/21/2003
I actually like this a lot. It makes me wonder about your age tho. You're really good at rhyming stuff- it doesn't stifle the feeling like it does in so many poems/songs.
Enter The Coil chapter 1 . 8/21/2003
Actually, I quite liked this one, and the title was interesting to say the least _~ ha...well yeah, really kool song, your work is really awesome!

Winged One1 chapter 1 . 8/12/2003
I'd feed the flames...but it wasn't *that* fact, I kinda liked it...

winged one
moon-dragon3 chapter 1 . 8/12/2003
Ok, forst of all I'm going to be blunt. I didn't like this, in general. It seemed so samey, all love-lorn mush. BUT there were some brilliant lyrics: Alcohol induced sense of humour

but to me your just a bore

Socially produced sex appeal

but to me your just a whore

was a real stand-out verse, really sharp and clever. Unfortunately there weren't enough verses like it. You say this was written a while ago. im going to see what else you have in your protfolio but while i thought this needed polishing there are some excellent raw lyrics.
Angsty Teenage Scribbler chapter 1 . 8/12/2003
I really like the idea behind this! You said you didn't think it was good, but this song definately has it's ups and downs. I wasn't enthusiastic about the chorus, but I liked the third and seventh paragraphs. The title was a bit much though, wasn't it? _ All in all, it wasn't bad, though I agree that there could've been some things better.