amazing update. please write more.

great chaptre update soon, lemme guess is tim a nobleman

ONE THING TO SAY UPDATE!

I love ur story! i normally dun review stuff...but dis 1 was great! plzplzplzplz dun stop!
luv Dee

I really like your story so far...I think u should have Will give Tim a title so that he can marry Cecil! or that he's already has a title! lol update soon! : )

This is amazing! Who said "I love you"? And what's going to happen between Tim/Cecile,Annisse/William,Annisse/Paul?
Agh! Update!

Great job. Try to balance dialogue and writing.
I'm sort of doing the same thing in my story. I have another side couple, but they entwine into the main couple. Anyway. The plots are alike, but still really different. Great job though. I am put to shame. :)

I liked this chapter too. Even though she called him pathetic, it wasn't like...putting him down, just disappointment.
On a side note. This may be purposeful, but it seems that one can't help but begin to dislike Anisse. She's being very two faced and moody. William however is trying his best to not make her mad, and to control his feelings, but he's failing at both miserably. This isn't a good or bad thing, I just wanted to note it. If it wasn't purposeful, great job it sounds good anyway, if it was, great job.

I liked this chapter because Will got to show off his masculinity. And, I admit, the inexperience with horseback riding helped your story more than I thought. However, I still say he shouldn't plead to get off the horse. Anyway, this was a good chapter.

I forgot to mention. I even though I would like for William to be more masculine, I really thought his sincerity towards Selisse not sleeping in an uncomfortable place was sweet, and gentlemanly. And I also thought it was funny, and characteristic for Selisse to decide she was going to sleep in the bed with William.
When talking about when William is thinking about the bed, you could say "this bed, as opposed to the bigger beds" etc. That way the sentence would move smoother.
I feel bad because it seems to me that I'm being really critical of your story, but I put emphasis on these things because they're really the only things I can find wrong. But I still feel bad because I'm being so critical. Please, feel free to review my story and note every nitpicky thing that's wrong with mine. Though, it may keep you too busy, and you won't be able to update. ha. Anyway. You're really doing a great job. I bow to your genius.

Again, William has found that he likes Selisse because she is different from all of the other women, but the way William is acting, if the two of them end up, it won't really make sense. You said yourself that most men couldn't handle Selisse. You could make it so that William allows her to win, as opposed to just giving up. I guess what's bothering me the most right now, is, what makes William different from any other man, Paul, for example. Paul is more masculine than William, though not a handsome. But Paul also allows Selisse to walk all over him, as does William, such as when he 'pleaded' to take a break. I guess one could make it so that Selisse is the only one that can make him behave the way she wants him to, but what would Selisse be attracted to in him? It would just be physical attraction, which obviously is fun, but isn't enough for her.

I really liked this chapter, but again, if he's a handsome prince, he probably spent a lot more time on a horse, and, this is just a suggestion, but it seems to me that Anisse would like William more if he were better than her at a lot of things, being unlike any other man she'd ever met. Those small, physical differences would set him apart from Paul, as well as Tim. P.S. I really like how you change her name depending on where she is, and who she's talking to. It really enhances the differences between her personality, and her expectation.

I forgot something on my last review: I really liked the humour again when William off the bed. But at the time he sounded more flirty than serious, then one found out he was serious, and it was sort of like, "oh..." anyway. This chapter was really good, but again, try to balance your dialogue and writing.

Again, I liked the sleeping without sex thing, but the changes were a little bit abrupt. And, you may want him this way, but William sounds a little bit too much like a girl, with Tim, it kind of suits him to be cute and sweet, but not with William. His voice should be a little more demanding rather than questioning since he is used to having whatever he wants, but again, if you did that on purpose, it's fine.

I read this story partially because the writing sounds a lot like mine. As well as the plot. I'm making a plot about pirates too, but our plots are extremely different, as is the romance. Also, I think the plot is a great idea, and I slap myself all the time for not thinking of it, however, if I had thought of it, it probably wouldn't have been as good, so I read yours instead, and you're doing a great job.