Reviews for Secondhand Sunshine
godawful teen-angst poetry chapter 1 . 12/2/2003
*stands in awe for a moment, basking in the wonderfullness*
This was...wow. Certainly unique. This is almost more powerful than poetry, more poetic, but then again in a way it *is* poetry...your vocabulary/word-choice/diction is nothing short of amazing, and the entire thing is just beautiful. Favorite story indeed.
lyv
Prophecy Puppet chapter 1 . 11/14/2003
This is terrific! Even though I have to look up most of these words in the dictionary, this is very inspirational.

Lovely imagery...
strangerthanthou chapter 1 . 11/1/2003
the imagery is a little confusing in this one, it kinda runs away with people. suprisingly, the sentence structures (all four of them) are still strong and valid. each has a subject and a predicate - you certainly didn't get lost while writing them. unfortunately, the singular event escapes me still. so, i made one up...

what i do imagine happening though, is the moon, symbolizing a force of radiant evil, fraternizes with some innocent maiden on the earth below. the gods do not care for such association and strike the maiden unconcious until the morning dew wets the land and the sun rudely awakens her.

hm...could be analygous to parties, parents, and alarm clocks.

a couple good words and phrases:

1. sanguine means relating to blood (or a red color) however, it is synonyms with both murderous and hopeful. i sure hope you mean the hopeful kind 'cuz when unseen moon pieces get murderous, things get ugly.

2. 'platinum radiance' vs 'coiled black light' - the first implies something pure, holy and bright; the second ('specially since it's seductive) implies evil...yet, it is the same light from the same source (the eclipsed part of the moon)...deadly like snow.

all in all, i admire your vocabulary and your ability to paint pictures with words upon the canvas of the mind. i hope you don't mind my criticism, i didn't mean to be rude or to demean the seriousness of your work at all. i just wanted to try and understand it...

how close did i get to the actual event - if there is one?
obsidian katana chapter 1 . 10/31/2003
wow...beautiful piece! wonderfully written and described, with simply breath-taking imagery. i love your use of diction here you always fill your pieces with, you really have a way with painting vivid images with your words. this piece has a nice flow to it as well. awesome work. keep on writing!
Once in a blue moon chapter 1 . 10/27/2003
I like the title in relation to the "story". Although it does seem rather random, it shows... underlying thought. The words are well chosen.
Jane Austen the 2nd chapter 1 . 10/18/2003
*drools* wow that was really amazing. I wasn't expecting it you evil person giving me such talent when I wasn't ready.*goes in corner and makes shrine around computer* it deserves the praise ok! Don't laugh at me like that...ok i change my mind do! Really beautiful work although I looked up some words in the handy dictionary this proved to have very large amount of vocab like you fowarned(scared me half to death I wouldn't comprehend it)*sighs* thank goodness i did lol. The imagery here is amazing, I can't wait to read more of your work!

pretty pink:)
Bob n Kazzi chapter 1 . 10/16/2003
Hiya sunshine

Just to say, hope ya okies, and come and read me stuff. When don't I write that? if you wanna talk, just drop me an email, I'd love for you to.

Kazzi
Pont chapter 1 . 10/15/2003
omg, BEUTIFUL, I bow to your expertise in descriptions *bow bow bow bow bow curtsey*

anywho, georgeous descriptions. You could possibly break it up a little, as it seems a little cramped, and it'd be cool if you arranged the words in an arc or something, but you don't have to.

applause, and love,

pont
NoSpace chapter 1 . 10/15/2003
2 words. Simply Lovely
EvelynWhitly chapter 1 . 10/15/2003
I like the detail that is enscripted in your story, you're an excellent writer.
Eternity's Secret chapter 1 . 10/12/2003
Was that it? Please don't tell me that that was it?
Black Tangled Heart chapter 1 . 10/10/2003
Definitely one of the most gorgeous cascades of prose I’ve been lucky enough to read.
UK-meets-USA chapter 1 . 9/29/2003
Hi. God, I ma so tired of writing this out . . . . . . *takes deep breath* Hiya this is Bob n Kazzi on my joined account with Ishuzu - you know her - and we have written a collab story for some unknown reason other than we felt like it,,and we would lvoe for you to come and check it out because we want reviews, and more specifically we want yours. *deep breath* thank you.

Bob (the muse) : There there Kazzi, breathe.
Ishuzu chapter 1 . 9/25/2003
I love the way you string your words together so they become like vines intwining on a terrace. Bravis...
Bob n Kazzi chapter 1 . 9/25/2003
Soothingly lethal snowflakes. I love the imagery you use, it's so . . . powerful. I would love for you to read some more of my stuff e.g. the story to one of my poems.
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