|Reviews for Conformance|
| glitterjewele chapter 1 . 10/4/2003
the brilliance of this poem was like a bell curve: it started kinda slow, then gradually got better and better and hit 'genius' level in the middle, and then kinda slowed down again until the very last line, which just kinda slaps you out of nowhere for quite a great effect. it's kinda like being punched in the stomach, actually (only without the physical pain, hehe) - you just kinda stop breathing for a split second. now, i just read 'damned' so i'm still floating on the amazingness of that poem, so i'm going to compare them: i really liked this poem a lot, but i liked 'damned' better. i thought about it for a while and i think the reason is that 'damned' transforms the profound and often striking philosophies that run through this poem into something physical, with color and temperature and sound and silence and things ~ and because of that, it keeps you grounded in the thoughts without losing yourself in them, you know what i mean? this one is *really* a very good piece and it does in fact make some things physical like 'damned' does, there's just less of it, so you have to work harder while your reading it to grasp everything you're trying to convey. that being said, my favorite lines and bits of lines are: "the knife diving deep beneath the flesh with ugly accuracy" ('ugly accuracy' is a GREAT phrase), "the disgusting flesh that you call/yourself," and "'why can't you be more like everyone else?'" great work! post again soon. :)
| gold against the soul chapter 1 . 10/3/2003
" the knife diving deep beneath the flesh with ugly accuracy" - that's a great line. This poem is again, very eloquent and nicely thought out, ending at the right place, the lines seem exactly how they should be. Well done.