Reviews for When You Own the Universe
DofD chapter 2 . 6/20/2011
I love him already.
DofD chapter 1 . 6/20/2011
Soooooo... I had every intention of going to the QoaQR part two but then I made the mistake of reading the summery for this one and well... Part two may have to wait.
youngin-matomon chapter 26 . 6/13/2011
okay.. this is going to sound really mean but...

the only part i liked in the entire story was this quote "I do, I really do love you. I love everything about you, every single quality, every quirk, and how these things can sometimes annoy the heck out of me. I love it all, because I love you." and the ending of this chapter. i know that might be bad but its not all that bad actually...

man that's confusing.

ok. what i MEAN to say is: you're an ok writer, your plot line is pretty good, your characters could sometimes use some work, and the any real problem you have is that you make your characters ramble a lot when they're explaining something. like Elliot's first secret admirer note? that was really long i almost didn't read it because it was long. the thing is, secret admirer notes aren't supposed to be that long nor that gushing. sometimes you deviate and your story becomes more unreal and... weird. like ur overdoing the romance or something.

you're not a bad writer, you're actually better than most of the pathetic weasels i sometimes see here on FP (no offense to anyone though) and you're plot line is MUCH better than the ones i've been reading recently. this was an ok read. i didn't like it but i didn't dislike it and found a lot of things to admire.

so job well done! XD
elma chapter 26 . 6/11/2011
I think you got the tone of it just right :) Not overly sappy, lots of fights. And from Jonah's point of view, remembrance is pretty funny (HAHA) oooh I want to read the rest of your stories :) (did i tell you that I think their names are super cute? Remembrance Olivia Pierce. Remington Oliver Pierce. THEY MATCH! SO CUTE! and seriously never heard people with their names before...)

I read somewhere that you actually want to be an author? I want to wish you the best of luck in that endeavour :) Just curious (if you'll reply to this, no worries if you don't I'm sure you're very busy with your life as I should be but.. am not.. ) what kind of genre would you like to write if you were an author?
elma chapter 24 . 6/11/2011
read the first four words. "remington's point of view"

YAAAAAAAAAAA THOUGHT I WOULDN'T GET TO SEE THIS; ONLY THE AFTERMATH! YAY! 3 cookies and warmth and much love to you! :D

I love it! Love their relationship and how he names it as a "tone". :)
elma chapter 23 . 6/11/2011
I've got no idea how you write each of the character's perspectives so well. Like there's this one event, but each person sees it differently and you encapsulate their personality, their bias and everything in their reaction that event. It's AWESOME!

and I don't think I've ever seen the guy say "no", "I'm not ready for it" seriously! It's refreshing. And then also kind of nice because Rem didn't do that, he went for it! :D

Love this story :)
elma chapter 22 . 6/11/2011
I liked the ending of this chapter! Nice comic relief :D (remington chasing jonah)
elma chapter 21 . 6/11/2011
they're pretending... i'm alive again. wow, that was an emotional rollercoaster. and the revelation actually lives up (and fits to) the expectations :) like you foreshadowed it right! i wish I could actually hear his irish accent haha :)

NEXT CHAPTER!
elma chapter 20 . 6/11/2011
AHHHHHH

I DIED

NO WAY

ELIOTT AND JONAH ARE A COUPLE NOW?

i died. here lies my grave. may i rest in peace. i can't believe you did that. i am so glad you've finished this story. you wrote this so long ago and you have more stories! i must read them all! whyy am i in my senior year? actually truth be told i am in exam period (HAHA)

NEXT CHAPTER
elma chapter 19 . 6/11/2011
IRELAND! HIS HOMELAND! THIS HAS GOT TO MEAN SOMETHING! is ... ellie the mystery girl? :) at first i was terrified it was alicia (really.) (so relieved when she wasn't... hehe)

I SHALL READ ON
elma chapter 17 . 6/11/2011
Wow! No I love what you did to Alicia :) you said, "I'm one of those writers that love to take absolutely dreadful characters and make them grow up into better people" I love that :D Definitely an admirable trait :)
elma chapter 16 . 6/11/2011
I love how your story is actually cohesive and events that happened before actually foreshadows what happens in the future. Your characters are consistent! It just works! :) Great job!
elma chapter 15 . 6/11/2011
A touching chapter. You've characterised them basically perfectly! Just letting you know :)
elma chapter 14 . 6/11/2011
haven't finished the chapter yet but am laughing SOO much about how the bad boy thing is all just a facade and he had to lie and use oregano to kick somebody out of school.. HAHA.. love it ! :D

okay he is sooo cute. ("It's just.. I don't want that (italics) to mean nothing, you know? It's supposed to be an act of love) - that's basically where I decided I liked him. kudos to you the author for making me have a complete turnaround for jonah! (and i seriously don't know whether i like rem or jonah better :s
elma chapter 13 . 6/11/2011
I wasn't expecting that from Alicia :( but I am SO glad rem pulled through and didn't fall for her.. skin.. and such.. LOL yeah. okay. just giving you a review count to tell you I am liking the story :D
3,642 | « Prev Page 1 .. 4 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 24 .. Last Next »