Reviews for When You Own the Universe
random chapter 20 . 5/26/2014
God, her mother is annoying. She talks like the 'wise old woman', and she's-pardon my non-Gaelic- a bitch.
my princess ending chapter 26 . 4/27/2014
Let me just say Mem is beyond perfect for Jonah. They click so well and you can tell that they love each other so much without them saying anything. Watching their relationship grow was amazing because I loved watching their small bickering. My phone is acting up right now so I can't leave a longer review but I like this story a lot. :)
my princess ending chapter 11 . 4/15/2014
The dream was a bit far fetched since she's so lucid and she remembers everything in it, down to the detail of so much dust on the chairs but I appreciate it because I want to know what happened between them. Hopefully Jonah and Mem get to talk about their past someday. I was thinking Mem's dirt on Jonah was probably going to be something about his dad and his family but it turns out to be even better than that. I appreciate your creativity and that kiss at the end was on point. :)
SiriuslyPink chapter 2 . 4/10/2014
Remembrance is a HORRIBLE name. It almost made me want to quit reading. Why on earth would you pick it?
my princess ending chapter 2 . 4/1/2014
I love your choice of names and I love how you start off with the auction and get down to business. I also really like how you give a little background of the past or a little explanation when needed.
Jess chapter 14 . 1/31/2014
I love Jonah's pov...hope theres a lot of it in the future!
Jess chapter 12 . 1/31/2014
Im in love with this story.
loivissa17 chapter 26 . 1/12/2014
after reading this whole story, i have one word for you. Beautiful.
Guest chapter 26 . 12/18/2013
I really do hope you're a published author now.
Lexi chapter 26 . 12/7/2013
Same person as reviewer #3,602. I am also hoping you put a sequel up yourself. And yes, I did read the author's note.
Lexi chapter 26 . 12/7/2013
Hi, um, Secretive. I got inspired by this story, so I wrote my own sort of sequel. If you want place a comment here with your email, and I'll send it to you. Maybe you could even put it here, on FictionPress? So, uh, yeah.
Kylie chapter 26 . 12/7/2013
NONONONONONONONO! Please do a sequel, please! I already fell in love with Jonah, Remembrance, Remington, Elliot, and Chris! Heck, even Alicia. Please. PLEEEEEEAAAAAASEEEEEEE!
UrbanWonderland chapter 26 . 11/26/2013
My fucking god. This story was so goddamn amazing I am in love with it! It made me cry like legit in tears and I never cry like ever. This was so fucking amazing! It gives me the shivers just how much I am in love with this story :) You are so talented! Amazing! Really oh my glob! I am in love like seriously! You must never stop writing! This was one of the greatest stories I've read and I've read soo many! Oh shit you are like my new fav. author! I loved this so much :3 -Matty
FreekyDisaster18 chapter 1 . 11/21/2013
Hey! I'm here to share some news with you. This story was added to the Geek and Hot Guy category over on A Drop of Romeo!

Here's the Review:

"Helen Thinks: “When You Own the Universe” by Secretive is the story of Remembrance “Mem” Pierce and she has just been bought in a school auction by her worst enemy; Jonah Mills. However, because of their hatred, the pair of them often share arguments that end in insults but this one time they had a bet - whoever knew about more than the other was the winner and the loser was to leave the boarding school where they lived. Mem thinks she has this in the bag because Jonah is a shallow, spoilt rich kid, right? Wrong.

The pure delight in this story was that the characters; even though they can seem almost whiny and pathetic at times; were really padded out and had realistic flaws that you could imagine the rich kids having. The characters names are unique and quirky - hello, Remembrance has a twin called Remington. Can you say amazing? - which is just one of the traits that makes this story stand out to so many that have loved it.

The story bounces between points of views which could be viewed as annoying if not done correctly but I think Secretive had the perfect balance between all the characters. There was no seeing the same moment over and over again in each viewpoint, Secretive smoothly used the new viewpoint as a transition into the next scene which made it flawless.

My one downfall of this story is that it starts with an auction where Jonah buys Mem and nothing much happens with that, nor does much happen of their bet apart from the odd mention of the odd fact about a favourite. However, in the end when Mem does learn that there is more to Jonah than meets the eye, I believe Secretive makes up for the lack of fluidity with their plot.
Despite this, I believe that “When You Own the Universe” is a unique, funny little story that really stands out in the crowd. We may not own the universe as readers but we definitely own the time to read this fantastic piece of fiction."

Keep writing,

Helen xo
Nami98 chapter 26 . 11/18/2013
This was absolutely amazing! I regret nothing (just spent hours reading this) they have the cutest relationship x3
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