Reviews for The Dark City
Keely chapter 4 . 11/15/2003
Hey! Guess who? Anyway your story is great. There are just a few spelling and grammatical errors, but only things that normally occur when you're typing. Keep writing! I can't wait to read more!
Flames and Shadows chapter 1 . 11/14/2003
I like a story that starts with action; it really gets the readers attention and interest. I like the way the story seems to be going.

Sorry I haven’t reviewed earlier I am a very lazy person, I am sorry. Must go read more.
doughy-gossip chapter 4 . 11/13/2003
You go gurl! this is liz, fyi!lol

I love it! write more! lol

cant wait. the only thing that i have to say is to add some more details. Other than that, BRAVO!
Andaren chapter 1 . 11/11/2003
Wow, good start. Only critisism is that you should 'show' rather than 'tell'. For example you should use the senses to describe things.

Other than that, it's good.

Blessed Be,

Andaren x
Belle the Shadow-cat chapter 1 . 11/6/2003
Xaviara, just wanted to let you know a new chapter of Spirit Guardians was up Nov. 1, i'm not sure if you know.

Just F.Y.I

-Belle
DigiDayDreamer chapter 1 . 10/28/2003
Hi, Xaviara! Just wanted to let you know that I've accepted your characters in Dragon Warz 2 but I won't be able to write new chapters due to NaNoWriMo and also I have to update first my other stories. So I hope you won't mind waiting for about a whole month or so.
Belle the Shadow-Cat chapter 1 . 10/20/2003
Xaviara, i got your e-mail regarding SG (Spirit Guardians.) I think i'll be able to put you in . . . but i'm unsure at the moment. (I'll try, i've been trying to fit new entrants in.) But i need you to change your special ability, if that's all right. No, it's not that its "powerful" it's just that somebody else has already chosen that ability, and i'd prefer to have a little difference between it. But otherwise,it's okay. And, most likely, anything you suggest will be fine. And for your special ability

think along the lines of "something that a normal human being nomally wouldn't be able to do."

e-mail me, or put it in a review.

-Belle the Shadow-Cat
violingirl7 chapter 3 . 10/17/2003
Another good chapter! Plus you fixed the problem of duplicated stuff. I don't have much time so I'll just say nice job, and keep going. I want to know more about why the attack ocurred!
cdalloway chapter 2 . 10/17/2003
i wonder who wrote that last review *coughs, looks around*...wasn't me...that cdalloway sounds likes a psycho...

yeah, it's me again lauren...god, i sound like such a freak in that last review...i'm never good at reviews...i usually just tell about all the spelling mistakes and whatever...
cdalloway chapter 1 . 10/17/2003
lauren, lauren, it's me amy...*giggles excitedly*... i like your story, i think you're really good with the names...i thought you were going to use the story you let me read; i didn't know you had another one...by the way, i'm not riding the bus monday, so i'll give you your story in Spanish...wowzers it's fun talking to you like this...you have to read my story when i finish it and post it here...i might put it on ...i don't have anything to say now so bye
violingirl7 chapter 2 . 10/17/2003
Nice beginning; already the plot is engaging. Did you know that you posted the same thing twice? You posted part of the chapter first, then the same thing again with more added to it. Anyway, your description is your strength, but remember to use sentence variety to keep the readers engaged. You don't want them skipping over the best part of your writing, do you? That's a minor detail, though. You definitely have talent. One tip though: people post new stories and updates on old ones all the time. Depending on the time of day, your story might be swallowed up within an hour of updating it. So, write a summary for it! You could probably do it fine yourself and just haven't yet, but if you want a suggestion for one, I'll write something.(I haven't updated my story for a while and like to write summaries for other stories just for kicks :]) How 'bout:

Young princes Adir and Dale can only hear the chaos above them as they hide under the floor. But Princess Zala witnesses firsthand the entire destruction of her castle and people. Will they survive the menace now hunting them?

I have no idea where you're taking your story, so the last sentence is a guess. But, even though I'm in a writing mood, I'll stop bothering you. Keep writing!