Reviews for Addiction
BlueFish chapter 1 . 5/7/2004
I think you made it clear how it must feel for person in that situation. I think you did a great job, since I study psychology and what you write is in essence, accurate enough.
Celestial Sailor chapter 1 . 12/7/2003
Drug addiction is a terrible thing, it seperates families, shatters relationships and leaves that person with bitterness for many years to come. What struck me so amazingly about your writing was how a simple, everyday person could sit down, read it, and understand exactly what you were trying to say. It is, indeed, blinding to have an addiction that powerful, and surely not the greatest thing to be experiencing. However, the positive trait reminds us that whatever doesn't destroy us, only strenghtens us. Remember this.. and very well done.
-Celestial Sailor
Birdaloo chapter 1 . 12/5/2003
THIS IS IT! youve GOT IT! this poem is exactly it. i wish i could express myself like you! another job SUPER well done! *hgih five*
Birdy
light of middle earth chapter 1 . 11/9/2003
Yeah! Great... i will add this on to my favs! Only one line "being.. brings" that doesn't quite fit but the rest is something really special.. I like this a lot.. Can i have permission to put it on my wall?

Cheers,

McD
Seras Nova chapter 1 . 11/7/2003
Wow, this is even better then my Haiku "Herion" I love how you made this is the drug addicts POV. Nice work and great poem.

Keep writing.

-Seras
Victor Soulstorm chapter 1 . 11/6/2003
I think the rhyme is a little weird, but nice job on the whole. and to answer your question: Victor is my middle name
Miamouse chapter 1 . 11/5/2003
For some twisted reason I love drug poems... hm... anyway, this is really good, but I sense that maybe you're being restricted by the rhyme. Your poems are definitely good, but maybe after a certain amount of writing experience you're at a stage where rhyme doesn't help to shape the poem, it holds it back. But if you're more comfy with rhyme, keep at it, it works.

Mia
Cirien Phoenix chapter 1 . 11/4/2003
This was quite an interesting idea. I like the way you took this idea and showed it in your own way. You know what I mean? The rhyme seems a little awkward, but it's not horrible. Perhaps, you should try some freeverse poems. You may not like your first results (I never do. I write things over and over until I feel they are right.). Anyways, this was pretty good.

Cirien Phoenix of the Eternal Phlame

P.S. I haven't written much because my Grampa has been having a lot of medical problems lately, so I haven't been in the mood to write. I'm also trying to keep up with other sites I'm signed up for. I might be posting a few things pretty soon though!
DelightOrDelirium chapter 1 . 10/29/2003
It's very good at telling a story, but you seem to be restraining yourself a little bit. I see untapped potential begging to burst from the seams of your writing. I have a suggestion for you...Next time you have really intense feelings for something grab a piece of paper and desribe everything you feel without nameing anything that is causeing the situation- don't worry about grammer or rhymes or anything.

-

Example:

Busting open with inner screams a thousand shards of glass prickeling raw nerves nails trying to fasten me to the earth as sand scorched wind scrapes across the island of my heart

-

Then shape it kind of like a painting by adding grammer to a phrase -giving shape like line values- and take or add nouns and verbs to what suits you best- like variuos forms of color:

I remember that day, not long ago it seems.

And I remember busting open from rabid inner screams...etc.

It's really A LOT of fun if you have the time. I'm sorry this was so long and I hope I helped.

-Delight