Reviews for Musings of a Warmonger
Chris the Wolf Boy chapter 3 . 3/4/2004
Great, I like this story too. Its very interesting, and I can't wait to find out what happend to him after that. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Flamehail chapter 1 . 2/22/2004
Yay, starting on a new story from someone; oh, happy day for me. _ Ok, let's see it.
Typos:
**"Albeit they never got much attention," "Although they never got much attention," "Albeit" is so much more entertaining than "Although," but only if used properly. _
**"carriage, drawn by only one horse was" "carriage drawn by only one horse was"
**"huge. Around six feet" "huge, around six feet"
**"beard grown out" "beard had been grown out" or "beard was grown out" or "He had grown his black beard out" It's a distracting fragment the way it is, is all.
**"the merchant to come to the door. As it came to a stop, the man drivnig it" It what? There's no antecedent for your pronoun. I assume "it" means "carriage," in which case it should be "the carriage" instead of "the merchant" for which they are waiting to arrive at the door.
**"and steped in" "and stepped in"
**"made it's way from" "made its way from"
**"You know I expected better" implies that the guard really did expect better (emphasis on the know, as in a mother telling a child, "You know I told you to clean your room."). If you wanted the reflective sort of "You know," then there should be a comma: "You know, I expected better"
*dramatic cliffhanger music* Hey hey, that was pretty good. The whole back-history about the boy (whom I assume to be Rok'tu) seemed a little awkward, a little distant. But the ending, "present-time" (I assume, again) part promised good things for the rest of the story. It's not a bad beginning, and I hope the grammar et al. tips help!
I'll come back and read more another time.
Flamehail
Spasmodic Rice chapter 3 . 1/30/2004
Great story! The plot is original, as far as I'm concerned. The descriptions are written quite well, too. I can picture everything happening in my head. Just one question: what does Rok'tu look like? Character descriptions are a bit lacking, but the rest of it is good. Just quickly tell what they look like and it'll be taken care of. )
Anyways, I'm hoping to see where this story goes. Please continue soon! I'll be sure to leave more reviews for the coming chapters.
~Blizz
Ravage Blue chapter 3 . 1/28/2004
GREATSOFAR! *feeling very rushed* can't stay on very long...i'm at school... i totally knwo what you mena by school... it sucks... -_- well i really enjoyed it so far..well later!
Sock chapter 1 . 1/27/2004
Nice. I've only read chapter 1, but I'll probably take a look at the other ones soon. The story is pretty good so far, and the writing is all right. Your descriptions could be a bit more detailed, but it's an okay story.
wanequelle chapter 3 . 1/26/2004
Dun dun dun... I wonder why they took the men if they just let him go. Was it because he was just a kid and they didn't think he was fit for what they had planned for the men and they belived they had left him to die on the streets? Okay my immagination has run off with me again. Cool chapter, short but awesome to read. Update soon.
~Laura
Ravage Blue chapter 2 . 1/26/2004
MWUAHAHA! I SNUCK ON! even though i'm grounded... -~- well anyway... that was cool. and kinda painful too... *shudders* Poor Rok'tu... *sniff sniff* he sounds awesome...have i said that already? *shrug* who cares? GREAT CHAPTER! NEXT ONE PLEASE!
Ravage Blue
wanequelle chapter 2 . 1/22/2004
I don't know how you did it but you made a mercanary likeable. Maybe it's the fact that he has honor and wouldn't kill someone in their sleep. Or it could be that he is the main character. Well anyways I hope he doesn't die in the end and somehow miracuously escapes.
Ah! A judge with an evil glove!
~Laura
Foureyedsnail chapter 2 . 1/21/2004
No! Let him finish! *looks around* Am I talking to myself? Anyway, good story. Please continue.
wanequelle chapter 1 . 1/15/2004
Oh that's awesome! I don't know why I didn't read this fic earlier! I hope you continue with this and any other of your fics. I still can't believe you gave up on Path to Freedom.
~Laura
Ravage Blue chapter 1 . 12/16/2003
OO
that was great! *thnks* ow hey, question Rok'tu was the kid at the beginning wasn't he? *thinks over and over and over* ow ow ow... GREAT CHAPTER! NEXT ONE PLEASE!
Ravage Blue