Reviews for Aurine
Lady Peach Blossom chapter 17 . 11/15/2004
Oh my gosh! You have to continue this! Did she find the antidote? Is she going to die? Why is the prince such an airhead? More pressing questions than that pop into my mind, but I'll just wait and see, so update soon please! Good job, I love this story.
Thou chapter 17 . 9/15/2004
It's me, ocacaoo/cicatrice/M /VQ3lT...yeah. I changed my name...yet you can call me Indesicive Freak. Ooh...I should change my pen name to that! (just kidding...I hope) And I couldn't sign on to review because Fido the stupid secirty dog thing wouldbn't let me... [mumble grumble grumble] Anyway, nah, I won't die so long as there is no discontinuation of ethereal! I'm in love with that story! (this one too, but it's dead now, blah)
tangible mandible chapter 11 . 9/10/2004
Okay then, here's the run down...
Aurine survives (no duh, and sorry but Marc survives too) and begins training as a court official. She meets her new roommate, Cassity, who it turns out is a former love-interest of the prince. The prince continues to harass Aurine with his near-retardation, until he is found dead two weeks after the test. This leaves the Cair Tas without a ruler (the king is near death himself, and until then too sickly to govern a kingdom) so the official oracle (who it turns out is none other than our friend Sir Harlton) was consulted in a secret-ish meeting which Aurine and Cassity accidentally overheard. The oracle tells them (in weird verse, of course) that the prince's "true love" is to be the next ruler. So, of course, there's this frantic search to find out who the prince loved, but Aurine and Cassity know that it must be Cassity. Cassity, however, refuses to come forward because 1) she doesn't want to rule and 2) she's betrothed (and was during her little fling with the prince...ooh, scandal!)
So Harlton keeps on turning up "secret" letters from the prince to random girls, putting them on display to the entire court. On top of that, Aurine is faced one day with an assassin in her room. But was it for her or Cassity? And she keeps seeing these strange symbols (remember the beast and the book?) but can't remember what they mean.
So, through this long boring drama, it's discovered (you've probably already figured this out) that Aurine was actually the prince's love or whatever, but Harlton's trying to deflect the throne onto himself by mixing up evidence. Harlton also is responsible for the assassins AND the "beast" (a little added touch of mine-the beast was killed by Aurine's mom dumping coffee on her head, Harlton says he's allergic to coffee in the test. No one else caught that? Oh well.)
So, I hadn't really decided how it would end, probably something involving Harlton's death and the choosing of a king more worthy that our little heroine (possible Knillington). All in all it sounded too much like a Tamora Pierce storyline, and I realized that all I had written up to now was back story. Ugh. I didn't want to end up with some 8,0 page POS.
So you are spared the agony of the long version, and I am spared having to write it. *Ah, I feel so refreshed*
Any other questions? Did I leave anything out? You won't be hurt too bad, MX#R person?
~As always, COTCW
MVQI3T chapter 17 . 9/8/2004
Yes! Me! I will be phsically harmed-ed..ed...(anyways...) if I do not find out how it ends! T-E-E-E-E-E-LL M-E-E-E-E-E-E-E!
And I couldn't sign in becaus ethey wouldn't let me review again on any of the chapters!
tangible mandible chapter 17 . 9/8/2004
For those of you who missed my bio note, Aurine will be ending here because frankly I'm sick of it. If ya want to, then email/comment me and I'll tell you how it would've ended. Sorry, all! Just too many other things I want to write!
Empyrea chapter 17 . 8/30/2004
This story is rather good, it's just a little rough around the edges. You need more details about how the characters in the story look and to describe the enviroment. Such as what the country is like. Drop some hints as to what time period it is. Great story so update soon.
sparklypiggy chapter 17 . 7/20/2004
Continue... It's doing well, but it's not the best out of your things... but it comes close...
shameshame chapter 17 . 7/14/2004
Nice chapter, as always. Can't wait to find out if Marc lived or died, as I assume Aurine is a survivor... I'm off to read 'Ethereal' now!
sparklypiggy chapter 16 . 6/17/2004
YAY! I forgot to review this story when it was way back on chapter 5, so I didn't know you updated so much! Well, continue! I like it a lot so far! Royal blood, neh? So past family heritage making way? Or is she just special? Try to update soon!
OCacaoO chapter 16 . 6/7/2004
Hi! It's Cicatrice, i just changed my name! Anyway, great chapter,I loved it! ... Now to see who livea and who... doesn't. DUN DUN DUN DUN!
tangible mandible chapter 1 . 5/29/2004
Esay, you astound me. You're exactly right in that review. I wrote this story in 8th grade, and am too lazy to edit it and make it sensible. I put it on here because I like hearing what people have to say, even if I myself know the story bites. In fact all my stories on here are the ones I really have no hope for. If I were to put a good story on here, I couldn't ever publish it. (*Laughs, knowing she hasn't written anything even close to publish-worthy*)
Thank you for being honest. So many people are just like "Oh, good story." and that is evil.
Esay chapter 2 . 5/28/2004
So far I haven't enjoyed this story as much as some of your other peices. The writing is at times jagged and ideas seem to be develpoed spontaneously throughout, making it lack a little clarity. I think you need more elabortaion earlier on about who the character is, where the character is, and, as I've said before, the world/situation the character is in.
In chap's 3&4 the description is done very well, but again the story is developing to many aspects which lack clarity such as Marc, What the test is, why the test is, who mom is, the beast, the king, the setting, the mood (which is very hard to place because, so far, everything is so disconnected). To tell the truth I would have put chapters three and four first and moved to the test later, as the story is now it just builds more and more questions to the point you can't keep up with them all. Basicly the plot is not unfolding very smoothly simply because the events happening so far dont really relate to each other. As I have said before, your writing is great, but right now it seems as if this is just a collection of chapters and not a real story just yet. I do plan to finish this story and see if it comes full circle. Not a bad effort, and the writing was enjoyable (which is more than can be said for many of the other stories I've read lately, and those were professional writers).
A person who loves the story but sees so much more potential in it.
Cicatrice once again too lazy chapter 15 . 5/22/2004
Wairtaminnit... call me slow, but it's not Knillington, is it...?
Anyways, GREAT chapter, with an evil evil cliffy!
Hope you update soon, but... ah well. I'm too lazy to write it out yet again.
Cicatrice too lazy to login chapter 14 . 5/11/2004
AHAHAHAHHA! I was kind of wondering in the back of my mind what the hell happened to Marc... Anyways, great story, I hope you update soon, but no pressure, 'cause pressure sucks.
shameshame chapter 13 . 5/4/2004
That was so cute (the side-story thing)... even though it was a little depressing that she actually ended a relationship. Oh well. I still don't believe how good the names you make up are. I can't make up names of places or people to save my life. I'm so happy she's getting closer aND CLOSER TO THE LINT-EATING TEST! Stupid caps lock... Oh well. I'm too lazy to go back and fix it, even if it would've taken less effort that typing out this excuse. Anyway, great chapter, and I hope you get the next one up soon! ...And at risk of sounding like a broken record; no pressure, 'cuz pressure sucks.
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