Reviews for Not Just Pain
Kusje chapter 1 . 3/23/2006
Ah yes.. I like the point of view that was used, and just the overall flow with the 'realizations' you made in this poem.. good job.
Manuel Fajar chapter 1 . 3/23/2006
Those days now past that form geology,

Where heart lies stratified and mountains form,

Upheavals marking fracture lines of pain,

Of shock where continental forces met,

With crazy jagged intersectioned lock,

Shearing down to volcanic lava flow,

To blow explosive and disrupt clear air,

As your words sank into my heart that day,

As my words pierced your frail and pale beliefs,

¿What greater force could nature have than this,—

That tore our love asunder forcefully;

And, left heart landmarks showing this great rift?
SweetGrape chapter 1 . 1/27/2004
THis gives me such hope- you have no idea.
For months I've been in the stage of almost crying whenever I'm reminded, but now I can half-smile and you reassure me taht eventually, I'll just grin.
You said it perfectly 'reminding me of not only sad times'- I'm sure heaps of people could relate, whether you lose a friend or a relative, to death or otherwise- this is a very soothing piece (well, in my current state, anyway:)
SeaVoi chapter 1 . 1/24/2004
I like it, I can relate.
karmakaze chapter 1 . 1/24/2004
Yeah, I know how you feel...
I've been there too.
I like how you showed the perfume making you think of your grandmother by selecting a single impression:D
The reason So Beautiful will have a new story is because the first plot of Natalie's coming out is over and the new plot is about the GSA.
Anyway, cool stuff:D
flowerthief chapter 1 . 1/24/2004
I think you should leave that last part in there. It goes with the rest of the poem. Are you deciding which title you should use or is that the title. Hm...well, nice poem. Great idea. Thank you for reviewing so many of my poems. It's greatly appriciated :)
-
AC
William Ironclad chapter 1 . 1/24/2004
Nicely written. Conveys your emotion very well.
W,
The Great, the Mighty, the Orc King
Unchained Soul chapter 1 . 1/24/2004
I think u should leave the last part in but change the line "Maybe someday I'll be able to think of you" to "Myabe someday I"ll think of you", the rhythm fits in better with the rest of the poem. And I think the title should be "Not just Pain" cuz "Happy Times" sounds too care-free and happy when this poem isn't. I loved this poem and can relate so much. Keep writing!