Reviews for Protector II
goanywhere chapter 1 . 7/31/2009
i'm actually going to review every chapter...or try to at least.
cnthn chapter 21 . 5/2/2009
the ending was a bit rushed,

and you should have made clear

the time period that had passed

between when he was beaten to being healed.

wounds don't heal that fast

if his back was freakin' raw

then how could he even move?

there was a big misunderstanding about that,

and if you had written about aiur's feelings

more, and have her hold out for a little longer,

it would have been more dramatic.

first she says 'i hate you you bitch'

and then she's like 'iloveyoutoo'

the end, it's like you almost forgot that

he was in pain, all bandaged and stuff.

i love the story and jack, haha.
anonymous chapter 21 . 2/7/2009
wow i swear sometimes aiur can be so frustratingly dense. her self-denial makes me want to punch her in the face. i think she deserves a fate like malloy.

other than that side note, good story
D-Mish chapter 21 . 1/7/2009
Not bad, wish there was some description of the battle though. Dragged on a bit in the middle - overall 7/10.
cherrypiesizzle chapter 21 . 12/29/2008
Haha...sorry for all my random comments. I realize that they sounded snarky, and for that, I'm sorry. In any case I liked this story and wish there was an epilogue - the emotions were particularly vivid, and the imagery was great. Good job!
cherrypiesizzle chapter 10 . 12/29/2008
I feel like Fenix loves her memory a little too's like he's put Aiur on this pedestal.
cherrypiesizzle chapter 7 . 12/29/2008
Bah. Serves him (Fenix) right. I thought that out of everyone, he would be the least likely to submit to such base desires...I thought his first would really be with Aiur. Sigh. Oh no. I feel so sad right now, even though I suspected something like this would happen as far back as the first story (Protector).
cherrypiesizzle chapter 6 . 12/29/2008
I dislike the flashbacks, no offense. Your writing and interactions between characters is MUCH better now.
cherrypiesizzle chapter 2 . 12/29/2008
Your writing has improved considerably from the first story to this one...and as this story has progressed as well.
Not Who I Look Like chapter 21 . 11/7/2008
AW! I LOVE IT! U R AMAZING! I can't belive you wrote this, it's so good. No im not kidding, it's like publishable good!
deep.water.diving chapter 21 . 6/27/2008
finally a happy ending. Loved it. Your a really great writer, this is practically worthy of being published. Seriously. You're a great writer and I frankly can't stop smiling right now. It is completely awesome and if this was a book in a store i owould definately buy it, no matter the cost.

Well...actually i have no money, but if i did i would buy it no matter the cost.

Really hope you continue to write, maybe even one more chapter to see what happens. Does Fenix then become king? funky.

Really loved it. its sad i'm trying to think of other words to describe it but i can't it's jsut totally awesome and lovely a and makes you want to keep smiling. thoiugh at the same time it was infuriating as you saw things from Aiur perspective and she kept stuffing it all up but at last! a happy ending. !

heh. this is really long. but you deserve it. its awesome!

x3life chapter 21 . 1/7/2008
no i wanna know what happends after this! with how they end up and if they get married and the kingdom overall...
Sun Chime chapter 20 . 10/30/2007
Hello! I've apparently reviewed the 21st chapter already, so this is for chapter 20! All that aside, I can't believe it's finished! A beautiful story with a slightly rushed, but apt end. Had to re-read the whole thing to make sure nothing was missed, and now, I could point out a few errors in the earlier chapters, but let's not delve into that, it was written long ago, and all of us make mistakes! I've always loved the story, and still do, but am consumed by a strange sadness that it's over now. Will definitly miss Aiur and Fenix. (ESPECIALLY Fenix...*grins*) It's been a long two years...strangely, a lot like the story! Now, I'll read Dark Hunter! YAY! It's so hard to let go of a story...but great work on it! Please do let me know if you ever write anything new, on any site, would love to read it! *waves*!
flipstahhz chapter 21 . 10/15/2007
aww k8! YOU SUCK

how are ya sis?

i sorta avoided this update for a while because i knew it would be the end of this story. it's been a long while since i've read it..and i'm pretty sure i'll go over it again. fantastic conclusion to a spectacular story. hearted it to pieces. take care, sis

love flipstahhz ;)
Bloo chapter 21 . 10/12/2007
Okay, random conincidence, but I read the story two years ago up to what you had done. And then randomly got back on today, and it was finished! Thank you. Lots. It was a little rushed, but the writing was still wonderful, as always. Especially liked the proposal over Malloy's dead body. I'll be watching for more stories! Loved it!
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