Reviews for Afterworld: Volume 1
Daphne Tyson chapter 1 . 2/27/2006
Wow. So far I like it. I'm not really once for Sci-fi but I thought I'd give it ago since it sounded so cool.
Iren Masot chapter 11 . 1/19/2006
eek... 0_omy old reviews are in need of improvement.

Well, I decided to reread everything, seeing as its been a long time since I was here last. And there were some spelling and punctuation errors that just need some tweaking. Keep up the good work!
Sn4tcH chapter 8 . 3/11/2005
Hey! Thanks to everyone reading this. I started this like a year ago, and now in one month I have more updates than I have in the whole year past. Maybe it's because I've decided to get my nose out of the books, and start writing my own story again. With this whole Quickling story, don't expect it to be anything huge, it's just an ends to a means. In other words, it's a small part of a bigger story. Though I will say the end of the Quickling storyline is the end of Series one, as I have decided to serperate the story by villains, except for in the case of the 13, but that is a LONG ways off, and I may be saying a little too much... ;)
Iren Masot chapter 7 . 3/6/2005
NO!nonononononononononoNO!I ran outta chapters! UPDATE SOON!

OR ELSE!
Iren Masot chapter 3 . 3/6/2005
oops...its "ring a bell."

Pillow fight? wtf kind of name for a chapter is that?
Iren Masot chapter 2 . 3/6/2005
ooh! a cliffhanger!

no... wait... theres 7 chapters right now...:P oh well, at least i don't hav to wait!
Iren Masot chapter 1 . 3/6/2005
Whoah... I think that you might be the only author that has good taste in writing that I've seen in a long while.

And that's saying something.(don't ask for me to say anything else, I found NOTHING WRONG. And that's saying something else.)
Sn4tcH chapter 5 . 9/21/2004
Wow that was a really kind review. Thanks! I have to say that the one thing I kind of pride myself on is dialogue and characters, I think I would be a better script writer than a book writer any day. I have a friend that prides himself on details. If anything he almost deserves co-author status, except he didn't write anything. lol. I wish he had actually co-wrote this with me, so maybe there could be something going on in the middle of monologues.
ShredOfReality chapter 1 . 9/16/2004
Couple of things: One, I really like the News Broadcast thing. It is one of the most convincing 'Last News' writings of any post-apocalyptic sci-fi sotry I've ever read, which are usually handled quite badly. It disappointed me to see the classroom scene though. THe exposition was handled rather badly, and, while you do introduce characters,almost all of what the Professor is saying is clearly for the reader's benefit, since virtually all of what he's saying would already be known by the 'teens'. A good way to avoid this is to never begin a bit of dialogue with "As you know" since this usually screams at the reader 'Blatant Exposition'. This classroom scene would be on par with having a teacher tell a US history class in high school, "As you know, America was founded after we defeated the British in a war known as The Revolutionary War." They already know that. Also, keep in mind that you don't have to set up everything in scene 1. You can stretch it out over chapters... even the entire book. Sci-Fi readers are, as a whole, smart, and if you mention a 'City-State', even in passing, it will instantly tell them what kind of World Situation the story is facing. If you can streamline this section, and fix a couple of rough edges, I believe you may have publishable material on your hands. Good luck!
biminator chapter 5 . 9/16/2004
heheh. nice chapter. update soon.
biminator chapter 4 . 4/25/2004
interesting story. the empty passenger ship was a good touch. update soon.
Hook chapter 1 . 3/27/2004
I think that this is one of the greatest sci-fi stories that i have read in years. I know that it isn't finished, but this is good. Keep writing this story and others.
Sn4tcH chapter 1 . 3/26/2004
Okay, all fixed, hopefully.
Mbwun chapter 1 . 3/26/2004
You should put all of your chapters under one story. Otherwise, it's a violation of the Terms of Service. And it makes it easier to read the whole story.

Just thought I'd let you know.

About the story itself: it's well-written and fairly imaginitive; I'd be interested in continuing.

~He Who Walks On All Fours
wyldflowa chapter 1 . 3/26/2004
The news reports and the classroom lesson are a good way to introduce the reader into this world and to help explain what is going on.
Nicely written and well paced.
My curiousity has been roused by how Larn knows so much about anthros and who is Kyran...?
I really would like to read some more of this! _
lotsa love
wyldflowa x