Reviews for The Return
foxracer186 chapter 6 . 3/8/2005
This story is going great. I hope to finish it soon. I really got hooked when Edward started beating the shit out of Joanne but i'm glad he wasn't trying to kill her. Keep up the good work, and i'll keep on reading.
one winged fallen angel chapter 10 . 12/16/2004
Hell yea! Way to come back strong with a nice chapter. The guy turning into a werewolf was a nice touch. It was also pretty cool to see Edward act more like a vampire than in the past chapters. The chapter was nice after the last one, but it didn't really explain much. It didn't really seem to serve much of a purpose, but then again every chapter doesn't have to inspire an epiphany. Good job.
one winged fallen angel chapter 9 . 12/15/2004
You are being too hard on yourself. Don't worry you haven't lost your edge and the chapter was fine. It certainly wasn't good, but it wasn't all that bad either. Sure it was a little boring since nothing happened, but everyonce in awhile you need a chapter that exists only to add a little meat to the story. It had story involved stuff so it wasn't all bad. there was one major mistake that i remember seeing. It was in the first paragraph;"A came toward him and grasped his shoulder"it seems like you switched trains of thought in the middle of that sentence so it was a little confusing but not unforgivable. anyway, keep it up. this is a pretty interesting story. also in closing i would like to say that you rock for Edward's last line that ended the chapter. the delivery of that was beyond perfection.
RedXfire chapter 1 . 12/13/2004
Its allright... i mean i started reading the first chapter kinda got bored of it and then went back to read it all and it was very good i loved it so keep up the good work
Liar Through and Through chapter 1 . 12/12/2004
sounds good, i would read more, but i have to go to bed. also, maybe you shouldn't describe the people in such detail. when i read i like to creat them for myself, and i'm pretty sure other ppl do to.
one winged fallen angel chapter 8 . 8/13/2004
Well, that certainly was interesting. other than some grammatical and spelling errors, a great chapter that intros some promising characters.
one winged fallen angel chapter 7 . 8/13/2004
short, but surprisingly freaky. making the swords of rock with only his mind was pretty sweet, but the mirror thing was just too creepy for words. great job
one winged fallen angel chapter 6 . 8/13/2004
Another superb chapter. Man, you are really on a roll with an intriguing story. the plot is shaping up great and the characters feel rooted in reality somewhere. also it is a nice twist having the people thought dead alive instead. keep it up
one winged fallen angel chapter 5 . 8/13/2004
whoa, that was rather action packed. Perhaps a little too much. Overall the fighting was entertaining, but it did feel repetitive and slightly drawn out at the end. Not much else to really say since the whole chapter is this one fight. the reasons behind Edward's assaults were elusive at first, but not too difficult to forsee. anyway they were out of the ordinary. good work!
one winged fallen angel chapter 4 . 8/13/2004
Good chapter. the flashback was well done and while giving a taste of the much needed backstory, it also had a sense of eeriness which was a nice touch.
Roadside Dryer chapter 6 . 6/14/2004
Werid, and if the vampire guy-Edward is a vampire, wouldn't he know not to like do that stuff infront of normal people? Or do normal people know there are "real" vampires and werewolfs and witches?
Roadside Dryer chapter 5 . 6/14/2004
Stupid stupid stupid! Make it stop! Gosh, that's...werid (this is not an insult) I would tone down the fighting, it kinda got boring-it was like the same thing over and over.
Falkner chapter 5 . 4/30/2004
That was definitely not what I expected, but now, I guess I can see why it had to happen. I only saw a few typos in the first three paragraphs; a couple letters got switched around, nothing major. Keep up the good work.
Hunter chapter 4 . 4/27/2004
nicely done. i like it. when do i come in again? overall, very good
Falkner chapter 4 . 4/24/2004
I like you you cleared up who Horton was and the like. Good chapter.
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