Reviews for Dark Hunter
Michaelia chapter 21 . 2/1/2006
Hi. I started reading your fic about two days ago and couldnt stop. So I guess its different to me. Being able to read everything without missing months of waiting. I really love your style and the way you span everything out normally. Rather than rush everything. But on some parts I found myself getting lost. I do hope you don't kill off your characters in the end. I thimnk it would break all our hearts.
Brainstew chapter 1 . 1/21/2006
O You have updated! Oh yay! *hugs* YOU'RE BACK! Right, tomorrow, I have nothing to I will review! It's been in the back of my head for so long but I've never got around to reviewing. And I wont let myself read it until I'm ready to review it otherwise I may take even longer. So I'm verra excited. Hehe oo yay... sorry... but thank u so, so, so much for the 2 dedications! I was sure you wouldnt cuz it's been so long since I reviewed...
KaronePrincess chapter 21 . 1/19/2006 finally updated!

I've been waiting you.

The chapter is great! SHe is a very tough and stong girl. She's independent. He's a nice guy.

Please update more!
RuathaWehrling chapter 2 . 1/13/2006
So what's with the first chapter being a "default chapter", anyhow! Slacker! Go give it a name! And now, on to this chapter...

1.) "She pressed her hands against the darkness that seemed to build a wall that was surrounding and trapping her" - This isn't as clean as the rest of your writing. The two "that"s in the sentence detract, I think. Can you take a look at it, perhaps?

2.) "She touched her face. It was naked." - There's nothing technically wrong with this, but who calls their face "naked"? I mean, that's it's normal state. You might say "uncovered" or something, but "naked"?

3.) "She opened her eyes and struggled to calm her harsh breathing..." - The next few paragraphs after this are all very short, yet related. Why not combine them (or some of them) to make it easier to read? Short lines might be good for a dream sequence like above, but not for the waking world.

4.) "Adam tugged on the simple cord around his neck that supported a small, unremarkable-looking flat pendant pensively" - You've split "tugged pensively" apart so far in this sentence that it's odd-feeling. Try setting them next to each other.

5.) 'He could have them arrested on treason and killed without a trial." - Nice guy!

6.) Wouldn't King Matthew know who had raped Fenix's mother?

7.) "It was an option that most took, as it usually gave them a slight edge over the competition." - If everyone does it, how can going there give you an edge?

8.) "She brought Sam back safely" - He doesn't know that yet, and his wife certainly doesn't believe it...

I like each piece of the chapter, but the combination of so many different as-of-yet-unrelated characters was a bit mind-boggling. I hope they meet each other soon! Anyhow, I have to go now, but thanks much for the story! I'm very impressed and will be back at some point to read more! Laters! -Ruatha
RuathaWehrling chapter 1 . 1/13/2006
Hi Kait! It's Reythia from A Writer's Touch, AKA Ruatha, here. I'm sitting at work waiting for the computer to run, so I decided to read something of somebody's from the site, and your link came first. :) So, I'll comment as I read. Just to warn you, romances aren't my favorite thing to read, but since you said you didn't like the rest of your stuff anymore...

1.) "The traumatic experiences that force lives to cease to live" - This is the first line I've found that sounds kind of awkward (the rest has flown together well). But... how can a "life" cease to "live"? Lives don't live - people (etc) do. Know what I mean?

2.) "I do not want to die. I just want to hurt. Just to see if I still can be hurt." - Very nice! Well, I mean, the CONCEPT's not nice, obviously, but the writing is! :)

Nicely done, Kait! I'm very impressed with your writing style, and exceedingly pleased to find no grammar errors (which are my pet peeve). You've made me really curious to learn what exactly happened to her... and why this is a love story, of course!

Take care, and thanks! -Ruatha
Morgan Davis chapter 21 . 1/12/2006
oh man i love this! and yeah i understood the last part, like she learned that she needs to live right? well actually theres alot more than that but i cant really put it into words. . . oh well. . . ok well hurry and update! this chapter took soo long to come up!
none chapter 21 . 1/7/2006
You scare me with your awesome powers of author-ness. This story rocks.
erikphantom chapter 21 . 1/6/2006
im way too lazy to sign in. anyway, hi again! geesh, finally you updated. heh, sorry! i didnt mean that... -.-''

update faster! _
Raging Libra chapter 21 . 1/6/2006
i'm still reading! (i used to be known as Osha) loved the chapter, though i think i'll have to reread that last part again...i feel sorry for fenix though. poor thing...
bulletproof.cupid chapter 21 . 1/5/2006
the ending there, i liked how you tied it into the beginning. i like how did that. control and manipulation... not so different from guidance, now is it? i don't know. i'm being a bit random here.

haha darkness has a life of it's own. polar opposites and yet you're tying them together. you complared life to light and now it's darkness. reminds me of the starting... how love was hate. you couldn't begin to love unless you knew how to hate. i like that. everything's tying together... you must be close to ending this, hmm? she's hanging on to life here, the light... but i just see her dying in the end. absolution of responsibility. kind of like hamlet...?

All that remained was letting go and giving in to the light, not the dark, the light that she’d always run and hid from and cut off her arms.- lol, so death is light? i'm reading into this too much and confusing myself.

ah purgatory is a freaky concept. just waiting there... waiting for so long... until salvation. we do that in life - we wait for hope, for some kind if escape and even when you're dead, you have to keep of waiting. when does it end? i'm talking to myself again.

lots of this in this chapter reminded me of other things. allisions, if you may. snow white lying in her glass coffin... and then saw2. the whole twin bland thing made me remember the first scene. hte guy cause so much pain to other people but he feared it himself. he couldn't gouge out his own eye to get the key and escape. messed up world, huh? i think i've said that twice.

btw, forgive me if i ruined saw2 for you. it's bloody awesome, no pun intended ;)

ah a thought can up when i was reading this? have you ever been in love? fenix' behaviour reminded me of infatuation - his heart racing, the googly eyes and shit. and then it reminded me of true love. how could one not be disappointed when the one you love goes back to old habits... torrake. old habits never die - addictions never go. you may stop smoking, but you get the urge to every so often. you like the taste of it, the feel of the fag against you lip. again, like i said, tying into the beginning.

ooh that last scene proved that fenix really didn't know her. not that she'll let him. the scars she hides, the torrake, etc. i find him a little naive. but yes, quite true to his character. he has no clue what's going on but just has to help somehow. all he knows is his feelings, nothing more, nothing less.

keith. i like his character... and i bet that's a first for you? there's nothing wrong about him... except some leettle issues to deal with - sexual releases, etc. lol. it seems like he was betrayed by her... like she belonged to him some time back - and maybe he belonged to her? he was accusing her of taking in fenix as a lover, jealousy hmm?

hah i dont think i'm making sense anymore. i dont think i have anything left to say... and if i do, shit it. i'm porbably going to stay up till five anyway... and i have no clue why i'm telling you this. don't chide yourself... i know you're good. you should know you're good. i'm sure you do ;) keep hanging in there kid,

amanda chapter 21 . 1/3/2006
that was an amazing chapter. i love every word you write. please dont ever stop writing for this site.
FireBringer chapter 21 . 1/3/2006
Holy, you're back! ::squeals:: YAY! Wow, that was a chapter worth waiting for. This story really touches something deep inside. I treasure it. Always. Its so good to have you back.
Pamela chapter 21 . 1/1/2006
Yes, I'm so glad you updated! I don't know how you do it, but this story just keeps getting better. I love the line,'you can't heal until you know how to bleed.' I totally got that last part, by the way. Please update again soon!
uusernname chapter 21 . 1/1/2006
Please update asap!
liz chapter 21 . 12/31/2005
What you keep saying about messing this story up is a lie. I don't believe you could mess it up if you tried. You are so amazing. This story is so amazing. It's the best I've read on this site because of how personal it is, how everything weaves together. Your writing is so beautiful it's life changing. I'm serious about that.

I loved the flashback in this chapter because it's more into Aiur's mind that we don't get in the actual story much. And it always relates to the actual story. When she was talking about her lessons, I got a chill because I didn't like the kind of lesson it was. I didn't want to think what it meant. You write her brilliantly, if you haven't been told enough. I have never read a character that was so complex and yet so real. She lives and breathes. And Fenix is amazing, too, in a simpler way. But he's so believable. You can imagine a guy exactly like him.

The middle part was amazing. It was you at your best. It doesn't show that you've been away from this site for so long. Your writing shows no decline at all. If anything, you've gotten better. There wasn't so much imagery, more action. But you wrote it so well. And what Fenix was thinking ... I can only imagine how hard it is to write from his point of view. I can't do anything like you can.

And the end. Wow. The whole idea of letting go and mutual relationships - that was so brilliant. You have so much in this story that blows me away because it's simply so amazing. This entire STORY lives and breathes.

Please keep writing this. I can't wait to see the ending, though I will cry when it's over. Thank you so much. I am in awe of you, every time you update.
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