Reviews for Horizon
Deirdra Chaeli chapter 1 . 9/9/2004
The images in this poem are absolutely wonderful... I can see the scene in brilliant clarity. I love it. I have only one suggestion: if you need to invert word order for something to rhyme ("...together stay" for example) then you may want to move the word ("together" in this instance") down to the beginning of the next line so that your words flow more evenly and it is easier to read. Even so, this is beautiful. The unique image of a horizon is simply... astonishing. Brilliant as always.
EWindheim chapter 1 . 8/30/2004
You can't have love without the pain, it's just the way it is. You can't grown stronger and make the bonds unbreakable without hurt and pain. Hence the reason I added blue to the wings of the butterfly of love. A heartbreaking, saddening poem. Beautiful though.
Saraiyu chapter 1 . 5/26/2004
this was extremely well-written
Shinji Boi69 chapter 1 . 5/1/2004
This is true talent. i liked this one alot. You have a talent for writing. how do you find the time? You have 77 writings and you've been a member since 4/7/04! I'm amazed.
I wish I could read them all right now. maybe i'll read more tomarrow. Keep up the great work.
Karasu no sei chapter 1 . 4/30/2004
"As its silken shape slips silently to the ground
The only sound
Is your Heart cracking"
It's completely beautiful. Amazing. The english language doesn't have words enough to describe this. But it really... spoke to me, sort of showed itself to me in a way a lot of poetry doesn't.
Just... wow.
Cry Tears of Darkness chapter 1 . 4/30/2004
"If only we could together stay
But it would break us both, can't you see?
It would have broken you and me
I wish this didn't have to be."
my fav lines... just wow... i need a new word for wow... if you have one feel free to suggest it. ive already over used nice, great, cute, amazing and wow... LOL! but your poem is all of the above :P
A Girl in Denial chapter 1 . 4/30/2004
Damn my bad memory! I can't tell if this is an edit of an old poem, or a new poem, or a second version of a poem... x_x Either way, a little blah, nothing major. Nice choice of words. Isn't "vermillion" wonderful?
freethephoenix chapter 1 . 4/29/2004
*sad sigh* Ow, my heart hurts. Did you break up with a girlfriend recently? These emotions on the paper seem incredibly pure and authentic. I'm struck to the core by the honesty in your words. Wow... just... wow.
I like how you capitalized 'us'. Nice stylistic touch.