Twisted doesn't mean bad though! I really liked this piece. It flows really well and it's just grand all around. Keep up the good work.~Dream Forever

That was very powerful and vivid - like a rich b&w photograph with a splash of ominous red. I especially like the first paragraph - as it hooks one through metaphor.

I didn't follow the last part of the poem as well. It was more narrative rather than visual for me - but I still found this all very striking, leaving me with mental echoes.

What can one say? This was twisted, yes, but extremely powerful and amazing.

It's (for lack of a better word) beautiful. For some reason this actually speaks to me. Your poetry is beautiful and you are very talented.

*shiver* I really have nothing to say. It is so sickening. Amazingly written. Wow.

The imagery in this poem is simply delicious. I like your style. Keep up the great work!
~The One and Only

Aww, defiantly sad. Poor guilty little peep. Came back to be punished. Stains on the wall make you remember past sins. I'd just do it myself, hehe, course since I'm not one to seek help for anything. But this is very nice. And scary. Heh.
Very illuminating as to how the brother thinks. Never painted it, as if knowing the sister/brother would be back. The speaker's been spoiled, tainted by the little brother's influence. Seems like he tried to do the same that was dwelt to him/her.
Ah, perhaps the little brother worships the elder. Kept him as a prize, like the speaker guessed, or like some earthly god. Or perhaps, they just wanted to be better. Sibling rivalry taken to the extreme.
Love the description, they really bled and fought there, a major drama of human against human unfolding in that room. Quite fascinating.

Hmm, yes, twisted does describe it. Nice flow, I didn't loose interest. I can't be more helpful I'm afraid because I have a hopelessness when it comes to poetry.
As for the review you left me.. No, I am NOT human. And the vampires (at least most of them) end up alive at the end, much to my disgust and my muse's delight.
happy hunting
~Midnight Predator~

I usually avoid poetry like a health food store. (I just don't get it.) Anyway, in the 3rd segment "you're haunted me as well" might not have come out the way you wanted. Other that that, this piece is well written and creative. Great job, keep writing.
**Slave**

Disturbing? Hardly. Vividly expressed to the point of perfection. I absolutely love the very first stanza. May I make a suggestion? Ah yes, I do believe the threat of personally rearranging a thiefs bowels is much more fun than choking them. Just my personal opinion.. Which reminds me: Another line I loved, "(the bile rising in my throat accompanies the memory of you, my dear)."
Continue with the good work.
-Sarah-

(sos, not signed in)
This is really good and thoughtful.
It could make a song
Ps: Thanks for reviewing.