|Reviews for To Fight or Fall|
| writer-in-progress101 chapter 1 . 8/3/2007
i like you spin on an old plot line!
| R.F.Y chapter 18 . 8/3/2007
that was so amazing. wow! so are cale and ember going to be friends now or something? or is this just temporary?
| MeZzeDUpGuRL chapter 18 . 7/28/2007
I love it.
It seems so real, but there's sill a lot of questions, no?
What exactly is happening? Why is Johnson(was that right?) such an old, scraggly, bitch? Agh, i hope you update soon, coz i'm on my toes in excitement!
And the verbal battles and jabs? Lovely.
| Ms.Romantic chapter 18 . 7/27/2007
oh my lord.
are they FINALy going to be togetherr lool
| Zozma chapter 11 . 7/25/2007
I'm back, which I'm sure you're getting increasingly sick of. I'm sorry :P. Congratulations on the awesome nomination for the FictionPress award thing.
"Ever-conceited and always self-assured, they are infallible in their belief that they are the Superior Race—and conveniently forget that they are descended from glorified monkeys"
Christian ethnocentrism in a nutshell :P
I could have sworn that prior to the last chapter a teacher headmaster would be a good thing, but Ember's evidence to the contrary is still a good point.
"Bond. James Bond.
So at the moment Ember is tired, grumpy, and pmsing? Poor girl. I guess the ice cream didn't do the trick.
"or had gotten beat up by some CHEAPASS wimpy boy in fake leather"
"NO FREAKING CLUE!”
Sounds like Ember isn't the only one whose PMSing o_o
Very nice scene altogeter. You can tell they're all pissed at one another, but a friendly kinda pissed.
Ha! I was right. Head*mistress*
"Which made it sound kind of like a horse"
I heartily approve of this line.
"My hyperventilating and Angela’s hyperventilating could have combined and we’d have a beautiful chorus of wheezy breaths and flared nostrils and rolling eyes."
Ick. Funny, but ick :P
"Rage at…at the people who had invented bubblegum. Yes"
Heh heh. This is a very funny chapter. But without gum, what would we use as currancy?
Nice description on the little kissass figure.
Cale's apparent cootie problem will make his and Cale's future mackage difficult.
"But damn. He was getting beat up by a slab of dead tree. That wasn’t cool. That was as uncool as…as…and he was too unimaginative to figure out how uncool being defeated by a door was. Just that it was uncool."
Aww, an unimaginative artist :P. He won't do too well in his chosen field.
Mac seems unreasonably worried about his collarbone?
And a ladder for Romeo? You're just full of clever observations and commentry :P
Oh, wow? The etiquette teacher? I didn't see that coming. Mayte she's just a puppet for Mysterious Shadow figure, like an Umbridge of sorts?
See, that's interesting. I didn't know Robin Hood existed outside of fairytale, let alone that there was more than one of them.
Ah, so Johnson is like a lesser-Umbridge, of sorts.
It's very original that the evil arch-nemesis turns out to be an etiquette teacher. Like: Harry Potter and the Terrors of Culinary Preparation or something. I don't think any dark lord has started his or her relationship with the protaganist by teaching them how to make brownies.
Tea comes in saucers? Also, and this is by no means an inquiry target at your work so much as the broad range of British-esque settings in literature, how come every single character ever likes tea? The stuff is bitter, stagnent, and just generally uck.
"and grinned wolfishly beneath little lambskin cloaks."
It's a pretty unique situation they've got. Allying with your rival so your joint efforts may quell a third party just so you have the opportunity to trage open war with said rival unmolested. They're willing to join forces so they can kill eachother better?
"Shut up, Daniel, I wasn’t making a pun"
"She wasn’t someone with finer cheekbones and breasts and legs and another hole where males didn’t have one."
Quite possibly the least sexy and poetic description of the fairer sex ever formulated. Excellent work :P.
"And why the hell did his thoughts keep circling back to Ember?"
'Cause you lurve her, Cale.
Aww, puppy dog love.
I absolutely *loathe* the name Momo . . .
Mac's history is a bit bizarre, and possibly a little less condemning than he has any reason to angst over. Teens will be teens, though, and God knows we'll take the opportunity to angst on anything.
Poor Ember :-/
| StarvingxArtists chapter 2 . 7/20/2007
everytime i think about what Cale looks like, i see Zack Morris.
LOL. is that weird?
| daretobe-dIfFeRnT chapter 18 . 7/17/2007
what! WHAT! Angela left! omgsh! i wasn't expecting that at all! whoa...man, that kinda sucks:[ i really liked Angela too:[ we'll see her soon enough though, right? i hope so! update really soon!
| Rah chapter 18 . 7/10/2007
| Demi Dear chapter 18 . 7/5/2007
OMG HOW CAN I HAVE BEEN IGNORANT OF THIS STORY FOR SO LONG?
I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!
I don't know whether you have a similarly imaginative... imagination (ahem), but when I was younger, me and my best mate and my siblings would play games where we were rich kids at a boarding school in an old mansion where everyone waged war!
Although ours was of the violent variety, as opposed to the vocal variety. Ah childhood... haha.
I was actually quite freaked out when I was reading the first few chapters, as it was creepily similar to our old games!
Anyway, nostalgic ramblings over, I'd like to focus on the characters :)
Quite simply, they're very well developed - even the side characters like Angela and Mac (my favourites!)
Ember... well for starters, I love her name. She's just so quirkily, neurotically... crazy and because she has her faults and her diva-moments, she seems real. In fact, she bears a striking resemblance to my afore-mentioned best mate. Again, rather creepy.
Cale... I LOVE Cale. He's just the right mix between bad-boy and good-boy, with a dash of craziness thrown in. I've read stories where the girl is all quirky and everything, yet the guy is perfect and normal. It's much more interesting when they're both a bit crazy!
(Also, HOW do you come up with all of their arguments? Some of the things they say had me in stitches!...I'd go back and find them, but I can't be bothered ;) haha)
One little problem... when are we gonna get to the romance? WHEN? I mean, I know Sara and Mac are all together and nice, but Cale and Ember? Not even a spark?
...You ARE going to get those two together... aren't you?
Anyway, this is turning into a complete ramble, so I'll wrap it up.
I love it. Please keep up the fantastic work and update soon!
| KT chapter 18 . 7/5/2007
That was really good! Lol i feel all giddy i have no idea why, maybe it was the whole 'touching/hugging Cale' thing, lol what a hormonal teenager I am tonight. Anyway my main point is...update! Hehe i feel demanding.
Wishing you smooth writing (wow i'm lame tonight as well),
| Midge-The-Hopeless-Romantic chapter 18 . 7/3/2007
i love this story
| Zozma chapter 9 . 7/1/2007
Yay Ember characterization! It's neat that deep down she likes the school. A very unique perspective, that, probably helped along by all the secret passages :P. "simpler times," though? You mean Ember's life gets more complicated! Poor dear . . . As if she didn't have enough on her plate with torturing Cale and the entire male student body for no discernable reason. :P
"I did not want…Cale…"
She hesitated. This just proves she wants to mack some pretty boy muffin. Hurray for future shiperdom.
Ahh, "woot," the telltale battle cry of pigheaded, chauvinistic frat boys everywhere.
"George and his friends go to the market"
A literary classic. I can see how its depth and symbolism was lost on an uncomprehending upstart like yourself :P
"like little woodland creatures committing adultery with the elves."
Fight mental image, Zozma, fight mental image.
"Which was wrong on more than two levels."
The image is winning. The image is winning .
"Caffeine was Cale’s unmatched drug of choice."
Clearly Cale has yet to meet my good friend Jack Daniels or the ever lovely Mary Jane. Maybe in college . . .
"everything else cheerfully ing-ing whatever they were supposed to –ing."
So Cale's crush on Ember is fast developing, while hers is trudging along at a snail's pace? I assume they'll get together eventually; the stated genre is romance and they're the only two main characters.
A mountain of jello. What a way to go.
You used "dispel" twice in the same paragraph. I can't say I approve :P
Aww, now Ember's pining for Cale and his jealous of his hunger for perfection. A fairly hypocritical quality, really, when, aside from possibly Cale, Ember seems to avoid the mae gender entirely.
It's a little cliche that you vilify characters for being ugly. Most of your presumed antagonists (Cale not included, as his added perspective makes him a neautral character at least) seem to be predominately unnattrative, such as the old headmistress and now this woman whereas Ember herself is gorgeous. On the other hand, perhaps it's extremely clever that Ember see's the highlighting flaws of everyone she doesn't like (Cale once again not included, as I'm sure she likes him)wheras she finds her own company and friends appealing. Who knows? Aside from you, of course.
A little melodramatic that they chloroform-ed her, but a hilarious line to go out on nonetheless.
Does everyone have troubled pasts? Ember, Mack, Sara, sheesh. There isn't such a thing as a happy teen, is there?
Aww, poor Mac. But yay for Mac/Sara shipperdom.
. . . An apparently prestigious Italian resturant allowed an incredibly handsome young man and attractive woman carry a *unconscious and gagged, gorgeous woman in and take a seat*? Either Cale and Angela are incredibly sneaky, or it's one of *those* kind of Italian resturants.
See, I never got the appeale behind two women fighting. I'm always worried that they'd get hurt. Maybe it's that thing I've got that most men don't. Wossit? Intelligence?
“Me Tarzan. You Jane.” I muttered.
I'm not sure, from a medical perspective, that wolfing down all that food after what, a solid week of not eating is a good idea. There's definite reprucissions to eating that much after starving for so long. Poor Ember's gonna have an even worse tummy ache.
You've accomplished the deepest awkward silence I've seen in quite some time. Good work :)
Disparaging is a great word and I plan on stealing it. Don't try to stop me!
"Others were convinced that the new addition to the staff was a Headmistress, and that she was only 21 years old and a former porn star."
Ooh, I just got a great new idea for a reality tv show.
"Which sounded slightly like we were about to embark on a secret love affair, but the very thought makes me nauseous."
Nauseous with desire, yes? Elope him, Ember. Elope him hard and fast.I'm in a strange mood, today, sorry :P
Aww, Sarah and Ember are being all friendish. A lot of writers seem to forget their the main character has friends for something besides barking at, but you've proved your skill by overcoming that. Look at Rowling, for example. Did Harry do anything but bitch and angst at any point in the sixth book?
"and is consistently rumored to have an iron fist"
Porn stars don't have iron fists. They certainly have some plastic somewhere in them, but certainly not their- y'know, I think I'mma let that one die prematurely.
Ah, woman problems. You know, I've never read a single volume that ever actively tried to follow a woman's cycle. Not a single book I've read has ever recorded an angsty teen, sexy bombshell, or warrior princess' time of the month. You'd think that kinda thing would be important ot character development. Not that I'm not reprimanding you for it, of course; I have no idea what my characters' timee of the month is. In fact, the only writer I can think of who *would* know the cycles is RespectIsSexy, who probably goes as far as to keep tabs on when her *male* characters' periods if they were women.
Back to the story.
Ah, misplaced manical laughter. Then again, when is it ever properly placed?
I don't get it. I thought a teacher subsituting for the old headmistress would be optimal, as all the teacher's present are lax on security and don't seem to pay any attention at all.
It's neat that you know your characters' comfort movies, though. Nice touch.
| S. E. K. Arouet chapter 18 . 6/30/2007
i like where you're taking the story and i love the satire. also interesting characters. i'd love to meet more and see more from the others, though i enjoy the ember-cale focused chapters. great job and keep up the fantastic work! :)
| Scribblesandink chapter 18 . 6/30/2007
Ooh, I hope you update soon! I really like this story, it's interesting. I wonder, though, that's a lot of people living in the woods; I'm interested to see how this plays out.
| The Cheerio chapter 18 . 6/30/2007
Eh. Forgot to review all the others. Oh well.
I believe I idolize you now. Oh great and wonderful authoress take pity on my pityfulish soul and PLEASE UPDATE SOON!
I have forsaken the love of my life, sleep, to read to this point. So please, dont make me spiral into depression. With the patience of my mother around dirty socks, I await your next chapter. :]