Reviews for Orion Drop Unit
Lightning chapter 8 . 7/6/2005
You write your action real good. Im looking forward to the next chapter. I can excuse for playing Halo 2 maps lol but only for one day! lol Have fun!
Lightning chapter 7 . 7/4/2005
Welcome back! I really like this story. Keep it up!
LightningFlash21 chapter 6 . 8/16/2004
Cant wait to see all the info. looking forward to it. that was a fun chapter forward to reading more. keep up the good work.
LightningFlash21 chapter 6 . 8/16/2004
Cant wait to see all the info. looking forward to it. that was a fun chapter forward to reading more. keep up the good work.
Leto Ghanima chapter 5 . 7/28/2004
that was very interesting, I enjoyed reading your words much. It seems to me that you are pretty darn creative, with the CATS and all. lol. Good Job!;)I like the plot that you have set, I am waiting in anticipation to read what you have in store for us next.
Zelia Theb chapter 5 . 7/28/2004
I'm a bit confused, but not in a bad way. It seems as if all of the previous chapters were just introductory chapters.
Now we have all the characters, and even the origin of the name. So it seems like all the pieces will be coming together shortly. I'm looking forward to it, and also a bit more character interaction too. Not exactly a "Tell All" about each one, but just a bit more to show their personalities.
Zelia Theb chapter 4 . 7/28/2004
Shoot to kill training session? A strange world indeed.
Nice action scenes. It just shows how well thought out the whole story is. If you wrote a glossary of all the terms, weapons, etc, it would probably be a novel in itself.
LightningFlash21 chapter 5 . 7/28/2004
Yo great chapter mate! I like the action, very fast paced. Hey why dont you give bioson the women in the team? I mean sci-fi women with guns! HOT! lol And hey what about a bio on the C.A.T.S? They are pretty cool like.
Master Chief chapter 4 . 7/2/2004
Interesting story here. There were a couple of things that I felt should be addressed though. The first was your changing of verb tense. One minute, you're using the present tense i.e. "Phal sits down"... and then you'll use the past tense "Phal dove out of the way". Try to maintain verb tense agreement. Second, your formatting. Try to have a space between each paragraph. That makes it just a little easier on us, the reader. I only saw one word spelled wrong and that was unconscience. I think u might have wanted unconscious. As far as content is concerned, the story is pretty solid. I'm still a little cloudy on who the bad guys are though. From the prologue I gathered that the CEC were the bad guys and that the Feddies were the good guys. But as I read on I still wasn't sure. You had the CEC soldiers gun down that family, but then you say later that Phal killed some of the Feddies after they killed his parents, so that seems really confusing, and i'm beginning to think that's intentional. The action scenes are just a bit inconsistent for me though. You show moments of brilliance when you were describing Phal fight his way through that first group but later, when it's the group you only give a general overview. Give it a go at trying to present the rest of the action the way u presented that first bit of action. All in all, this is very solid work. I can't wait for you to update. I'll be watching this one.
M.C.
Paul chapter 4 . 7/2/2004
Its good that we are getting into the action now. More! More!
Zelia Theb chapter 3 . 6/25/2004
I like the subtle hints of Phal's past. It gives the story suspense without rushing things too quickly.
Keep it up.
Lightning-Flash-21 chapter 3 . 6/23/2004
I like it. Its very good. Its good the way Phal has that sort of past and is following in his parents footsteps sort of thing. Action was good. I look forward to reading more
Htyn chapter 2 . 6/21/2004
Cool...
I like it, especially the idea of wrld unification...
Did he have to take a healthy 1 though?
I wish my nety hooked up as fastb as his...
::Maybe not my penname, me get back to u on it::
Love teh story
Zelia Theb chapter 2 . 6/21/2004
Very descriptive and innovative. You can tell that you have done your research on this one.
Zelia Theb chapter 1 . 6/21/2004
Really well written!
The plot is captivating and detailed.