Reviews for Nimetön's Gift
Innocent Harbinger of Doom chapter 2 . 10/21/2004
I'm a terrible person! I've been wanting to take the time to read/review, but school and work...
I love all the names! - Your wording is a little confusing at times, but I kind of like that (i'm odd). Really like Pekka, he puts me in mind of my uncle.
Gemema chapter 6 . 9/28/2004
I'm really starting to get into this now. I like the way that all three of your characters have their own chapters. Its a really great way to show each of their reactions and thoughts. And you did Marja's character really well, too. I'll be back soon for more!
Gemema chapter 2 . 9/17/2004
Cool chapter! I really enjoyed it, and will be back to read more the next chance I get!
Freckles Victorious chapter 15 . 9/13/2004
okay i'm done now. :p
though there was indeed few people there? i'm confused.
good description of watshisfaceinkeeperdude. quite wootly.
uh... why does marja say "what are you going to do?"
you need a comma after cat.
good ending. me likes.
Freckles Victorious chapter 14 . 9/12/2004
la di da. i hasn't found anything fantastically awful yet, sorry.
in the second to last paragraph, don't say the day of the eve of spring, its too long. chuck the day of.
and begin two sentences right next to each other with first.
and u say recent and recently close to each other.
goodly ending. adieu, adieu, remember me!
Innocent Harbinger of Doom chapter 1 . 9/7/2004
Finally! Someone who likes to use a language other than Japanese. I've actually gotten tired of seeing Japanese names and the same words and phrases over and over. You have a beautiful style and vivid description.
Thanks for reviewing Destiny Changes. I can't believe Marja is really a name! Honestly, I thought I made it up. This is the second time something like this has happened; I had a character named Ivanova, and then I found out that it's a Russian surname.
Arae Mi chapter 17 . 9/5/2004
Another great chapter...your story truly has me hooked! I also love the character names and all that...sound kinda Scandinavian. A new chapter of my story's up by the way, and you're more than welcome to drop a review or two...;)
Gemema chapter 1 . 9/5/2004
Very interesting. This is an awesome beginning, as it drew me straight in. And your description and detail is excellent! I will definitately be back for more!
Merciful Evans chapter 9 . 9/3/2004
Another three chapters, and a slew of interesting new characters in these chapters! And interesting to hear more of Risto's background.
Merciful Evans chapter 6 . 9/1/2004
One of my favorite aspects of your story has to be the names of your characters and places. You said you used a Finnish theme..? I don't know how to pronounce any of the names, and would be afraid to try, but I think they add a definite flavor to the setting.
On the other hand, after reading this second set of chapters, I do have one mild bit of advice. Your descriptions of places and people in these chapters were very brisk and spartan. A little more detail, maybe a few strong and evocative adjectives, would strengthen these chapters quite a bit.
Arae Mi chapter 2 . 9/1/2004
This is really good...I added you to my fav authors list. Thanks for reviewing my story by the way :)
Merciful Evans chapter 3 . 8/31/2004
I'm glad to have found your story. It's format is very interesting, especially as I too am writing a story of three characters. I've only read the first three chapters thus far, but I enjoyed each of the protagonists thoroughly and plan to follow them further along their paths. Your writing has an almost refreshing quality to it, and certainly an element of charm. As I said above, I enjoyed what I read greatly!
Freckles Victorious chapter 13 . 8/26/2004
hmm... u need to read the tales of alvin maker even though they're by osc. ppl compared it to lotr. or one of the characters. and don't dislike osc either; he likes tolkien. he says that lotr is laid out perfectly.
it doesn't really sound natural when suvi asks why watshisface wants to know wat she thinks. its kinda natural for ppl to ask other ppls opinions...
do you mean to
Freckles Victorious chapter 12 . 8/14/2004
um, i might have just forgotten, but was there a purpose to this ship that marja is going on? like, is it fishing or something or jjust random people who decided, hey, let's go and sail?
you need a comma after she thought in the fifth to last paragraph.
gasp, only one thing to complain about! oh my goodness! good job. kinda short chappie tho.
Freckles Victorious chapter 11 . 8/14/2004
yum, mint tea. they have that stuff at school... and it's only half the price of hot chocolate! good choice of beverage. I commend you.
so... the tea is a warm liquid that happens to also be rather cold? im a bit confused.
hm. mebbe instead of always saying my lad, just say lad sometimes. more variety. silly, u needs dialect! or actually i suppose not dialect cuz wordweb says that dialect is vocabulary, not um pronunciation. anyways, make him say ol' ship or something.
gasp! attack of the i supposes! you use that phrase twice. in the third and fourth paragraphs.
oh goody! u did use dialect!
a bother they are, but i like them still? is he trying to write a poem?
and say "sail one" instead of "sail a ship." it's repetitive.
you really are obsessed with repeating things for dramatic effect, aren't u? if you must have janne say, you're good. very good, then make him smile and say very good or something.
ooh, good line right before the breaky thingy. me likes.
oh yeah, before i forget, why is this story rated pg 13?
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