|Reviews for Tripping On The Way In|
| Julius Gillian chapter 1 . 11/14/2007
This was so exquisite Juliet, it touched my heart. 'tripping over your lips' that's a funny and innocent line. How do you kiss? There's nothing like a first kiss. And to think it comes so automatically when you do kiss, but before that first kiss you're totally clueless. You must've been floating and flying.. that whole elevated feeling tingling through your body. Can you even remember it now? I've never ever ever had a first kiss so I don't know what this feeling is like, but I have a hunch :)
I'm very touched by this poem, because I can sort of see you trying this away shortly after you recieved your first kiss and all these words are flowing from your finger tips. It shows. The way this read it was like skipping, or frolicking.
What I like about your style is you tend to write about the topic you choose from, and then you take a step further and tie in some aspect of your life revolving around that topic.
It's also interesting to me if whether the person you had your first intimate kiss with is still friends, fell out of contact, or are close friends now. Can't really explain why, but that kind of history intruiges me.
| AshGurl2897 chapter 1 . 12/30/2005
That was beautiful. Really, great job.
| pointythings chapter 1 . 6/23/2005
Lovely as always, Juliet. No issues with the lining this time. A couple of things: I love the concept behind 'you made me end in a way that lead me to believe I could go on' but I think it could be shortened to 'you made me end so that I could go on.' Just a suggestion.
Also, at one point you say 'the thunder of the sun and the lighting of the moon.' Thunder is such a wonderful word, but I think 'lighting' is weak. You might want to look into a , I noticed one or two spelling errors, so you might want to run a quick spell check on it mostly though!Yours in writing,~pointythings~
| D chapter 1 . 6/7/2005
I get it.D.
| SleepDontWeep chapter 1 . 7/30/2004
that is beautiful! i feel like im gona cry! it reminds me of my first kiss! keep up theses wonderous works! x