|Reviews for The Thirteenth|
| authorised1960 chapter 1 . 4/11
Hmm, I'm struggling to find the 'romance'; in this story as it appears to be more about rampant hormones that the sensual seduction one might normally associate from a true romance story. It reads somewhere between a sexual fantasy and borderline soft porn... For me, too much dialogue and not enough descriptive passages left me feeling as though I was overhearing an anecdotal conversation between two girl friends. The 'chatty' tone just didn't work for me. On the plus side, you do have a talent for telling a story, but it needs refining and polishing. On the whole 7/10
| mishxx chapter 1 . 11/3/2014
amazing plz write more!:):):)
| Jess chapter 1 . 8/17/2014
Daniel is soo awesome! really cute story :-)
| XO Ione chapter 1 . 5/8/2014
Once I've read a scene I found utterly cute, I can't help but read it all over again ;) This is so beautifully written, and I completely love the characters — I love this story, especially the couple, Daniel Jay Aleron and Samantha Kylee Tyler. PERFECT 3
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/21/2013
| Cool chapter 1 . 2/20/2013
Wow, I loved this! Very well written! :D
| Tina3 chapter 1 . 12/23/2012
I think that this one shot is well written and very detailed with the actions the charaters take. I think you should just put more detail of what the people are wearing and their eye colour etc as its a bit vague however well written and make more one shots! I enjoyed it ;) hope this gives you the help you were looking for. If not I'm sorry ahahaha xD xxx
| glowphone chapter 1 . 6/25/2012
Barry Hall Kravatz like if you switch the b and the h it's Harry (Hairy) Ball Kravataz (Crevasse, a.k.a. a crack)! That must be intentional! Am I the only one who got that?
What an awesome story too! Love it!
| An chapter 1 . 4/8/2012
Haha aw so cute and perfect :) Loved it!
| ffh chapter 1 . 11/17/2011
really cute story !
| Rosedreamer101 chapter 1 . 11/4/2011
LOL - olalala ;)
| DofD chapter 1 . 10/25/2011
| its-like-i-sed chapter 1 . 9/28/2011
.AWESOME! D xx
| Call Me Irresponsible chapter 1 . 2/23/2011
This story was cute. Reading it was relaxing. So thank you.
I know that was probably a short review, but it was a short story, so...
| Brolinshipper chapter 1 . 11/6/2010
Amazing, i loved it:)