Reviews for The Temptation of Dorian
Skeet chapter 3 . 12/5/2004
pomegranate sky chapter 3 . 12/3/2004
Really interesting story...please update soon! I haven't seen any mention of the God of Darkness yet, he going to appear soon?
The Fallen Caryatid chapter 3 . 11/30/2004
AH! This is such a good story, please please please write more! Grr, so much sexual tension, I love it!
An Inside Joke chapter 3 . 11/20/2004
Sorry about that old man comment, the cane threw me off. I suspect that Dorian's physical reactions may be important to further plot development, but I think you should probably describe them just a litle more sublty. I think it's alright to be really detailed about that sort of stuff occasionally, but after a while, it starts to seem a bit too much.
An Inside Joke chapter 2 . 11/20/2004
I like the subtle humor. Some of the wording was clumsy around the middle of the chapter, but I still like the way this story is going.
tmelange1 chapter 3 . 10/23/2004
Great continuation. Kudos.
Stormbringer chapter 2 . 10/22/2004
I like this a lot. Please continue.
Shadowofaman chapter 1 . 10/9/2004
This fairly well written, with a nice opening line (I just like it in its simplicity of short sentences) and no mistakes that I can tell of-though, personally, I would do the opening as "Peace, elation." as one paragraph and in italics.
I didn't expect Dorian to be so old, but I really like this little conflict he has, on whether he should go against his religion and speak with the two next door-thus possibly creating anger.
Also, I hadn't expected it was a man that Arthur was with.
You said in your profile that you had problems with doing descriptions, but I don't really see it here. Though if you do need help, ask me, because I'v been through the same thing before.
Keep up the good work, and I hope you will continue this sometime!
Yellow Log chapter 1 . 9/19/2004
hm interesting story...but id just like to say how old is Dorian?
thats all
update soon
tmelange1 chapter 1 . 9/3/2004
Great beginning. Would love to read more.
An Inside Joke chapter 1 . 8/29/2004
How old is Dorian? I think it would be cool to write a story where the main charecter is an old man- especially since there's so many about teenagers around.
Khenna chapter 1 . 8/28/2004
I don't know. The plot and charactors seem interesting enough, but there is something that seems to be missing from this, I'm not sure what it is.
It might be thoughts, but you put so many thoughts into it, I don't know why I'm feeling a sort of blankness from the charactors. All the same though, an update would be nice
Infinite Abyss chapter 1 . 8/24/2004
This is pretty good. Keep up the good work.
JonPon chapter 1 . 8/24/2004
wow, usually I'm not into yaoi(gay) stories and such, but this is very well written and i think it has potential. Great job! By the way, i have a story if you want to check it out.
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