Reviews for To Mistake A Girl For A Goddess prev 'Serendipity'
ShinobiWolf chapter 3 . 1/28/2005
I've been following your other story, but I really like this one too! Poor Jo, I kinda know how he feels. I want to go to an art college, but my dad thinks I'm going to starve. Literally. I love your descriptions of everything, as usual. That part where Danah snuck out of that old cardiac facility was really suspenseful. There was a little, mousy voice in my head yelling at Danah to hurry! I can't wait to read the next chapter! And I like Jo's apartment...
refused chapter 3 . 11/3/2004
Hehhe, so Jo's an icq-user then, eh? :D
Great work, my Princess! I really love your language, but I think I've drilled it into you so many times now so you probably already know it! And character-development at it's best, great work there as well!
The only thing I'm a tad bit worried about is, especially Jo, being too perfect somehow... He's a really good artist, has a black-belt and loads of other stuff. It works good as it is now, but if you add more to that list, it might seem a little too good, or something.
Danah is cool though. All those small details are great, like the thing about telling her cat for example. Details like that is what, imo, makes a good story awesome.
Anyhow, excuses: Terribly sorry for not reading earlier, I really love this story. Didn't help that I signed up for fictionpress with my old e-mail, so I didn't notice the author alert-thingie.. Gah. Please-don't-hate-me? :P
Me me me and only me chapter 3 . 10/18/2004
hnn.. I like your story. it's getitng better _
Keep updating~!
Eva chapter 2 . 10/7/2004
That was the BEST story I ever read! *_* I can't wait for the next chapter! U express things so beautifully and clearly.
anamika chapter 2 . 10/1/2004
your style of writing is marvelous. it's very intruging how you go down to minutest details . i think i'm going to love this story.
refused chapter 2 . 9/28/2004
Diana, Diana, Diana. You silly silly silly little girl. :P
Ah, great chapter! I really love this story now, you got me hooked. Nothing you say can change that, so learn to live with it, eh?
As I've mentioned, oh so many times, before, I really love your way of telling a story, your way of writing. All the details, it's like watching a painting instead of a piece of text. And the way the text flows... it's just... awesome... That's the best word I got to describe it.
Now, for the constructive part of this review - A little much 'cheese', so to say. Yes, we all love it, and it's no-where near the limit in this chapter. But if it keeps up being like this, it might be a problem. Just a vague warning. Also, you expand a tad bit too much on some points - mostly the 'mushy' parts. Like, when describing some of the feelings, you tend to do it a bit to much, sort of. It gets incoherent, I think.
Example: - "Revolving, sparkling depths that seemed to contain something mysterious, enchanting, enthralling … something was always continuously stirring beneath the outer surface, belying the hidden magnificent, might power within those scintillating rotating and utterly breathtaking beauty of her eyes..."
Other than that - GODNESS!
Margot Tenenbaum chapter 1 . 9/24/2004
hey! this is really good so far. great use of word choice! update soon
swtjemz chapter 2 . 9/24/2004
oh! too cute! i love sappy romances...but then again, you knew that!
I really like this chapter. i can't wait to see how their romance develops! :-D
feel better soon my dear!
lilith chapter 1 . 9/23/2004
Wow. absolutely stunning begining!
can't wait for more ..
hieiluver168 chapter 1 . 9/18/2004
it's really very good. you should update soon. i like it a lot. that jo chap seems very interesting. hurry!
Mourning Fox chapter 1 . 9/11/2004
This piece is stupendous! Keep up the good work and update soon!
SilverMoonLight chapter 1 . 9/11/2004
great! as usual!
Guest chapter 1 . 9/11/2004
really good chapter. carry on writing!
refused chapter 1 . 9/11/2004
We, finally we get to see this story here! :D
Ah, Jo, is it? Great name, it fits his personality somehow.
Jo & Danah. Yeah, that fits somehow.
You already know how excellent I think this chapter is - I've tried to get that past your thick-headed mind plenty of times already, and I think that you finally got it.
I wish you all the best of luck on this page, as well as on - and knowing you, you'll knock them all out with your great story-telling and awesome language.
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