|Reviews for To Peter Pan|
| Darian Porter chapter 1 . 9/14/2004
This poem fits completely with your other poem about your arguement with your mom. "Come and take me away to that land where you play/For childhood magic is leaving/Like smoke upon the wind"... this childhood majic to me is your dream to be a writer, and in Never-Never Land you could certainly be a writer and all your dreams would come true and there would be no mother to tell you that you have to get a job and all that other stuff. When I was a kid I used to dream about being in Never-Never land all the time because I never wanted to grow up and I think I kinda knew that when I was older the world would be tough, which it is. Anyway I hope you're feelin' me on this one. Ok now, I loved the poem, that is why I am reviewing you, but of course. You have a way with words my friend, you bring out thoughts as if they lived in your fingertips and you just let them go where ever they want and they write the poems for you. Now going back to those three key lines, "Come and take me away to that land where you play/For childhood magic is leaving/Like smoke upon the wind", these are your catchy lines that you need more of. You finally used a simile, I'm not sure that you use them very often, maybe I should check, but besides that key phrases like this, in my eyes, make a poem unique. Without key lines you are simply writing ideas, or possibly rhyming and putting a smile on peoples faces. Except beyond that I have to admit you do have a way with words, and for this reason you write unique poetry. I like it very much, now write and or add more poems because I've read them all. I'd be happy if you read more of mine also, if you could see me, I am using my pouty face... Ok I'm not that lame... just please read my stuff! I'm not gready... really I'm not. Ok I could be a little bit. I try my best not to be though. Adios. Hey if you have MSN (which is instant messaging if you're not familiar) I added you... so review me, tell me your thoughts, about MSN and my poems, and I will be totally pleased.
| sirius chatham chapter 1 . 9/14/2004
Oh man, that is one amazing poem. The message is so deep and I feel like I relate to it. I really really enjoyed this poem; it's incredibly well written and has a really deep message.
Very nice. :) Definently on my favorites.
p.s. r/r my work too :-D